Warning: immature content

 Don’t proceed past this point if you’re offended by implicit sexual imagery.

 

Some women won’t even let men know they’re upset.  I’m glad she’s being so forthright.




I think she’d be good at humiliation play, don’t you?  She could build on her knowledge of real clients who want real sex – and draw a few sharp comparisons.




It’s a natural gift.  That and practice.  And a lot of Gaviscon, if I’m honest with myself.


Actually, this reminds me of yet another depressing contrast between fantasy and reality I encountered in one of the very first times I sessioned with a domme, having been too nervous to do so, for many years.  (NB: don’t be like this guy!  Contact a domme!  It’ll be lovely; she’ll be lovely!).  With the wonderful lady, now retired, who stars as ‘Mistress Valerie’ in my early stories.  ANY-way, so back then she smoked (then she gave up – clever, strong Mistress).  So I did the human ashtray thing – wow, yeah, ash flicked into my mouth!  Oh the humiliation!  And then she gave me a near-finished cigarette butt to eat, and eager Servitor chewed and swallowed and… and… spent the remaining hour of that two hour session, with stomach churning, heart racing from the nicotine and generally feeling like he would soooo rather be somewhere else.  Oh well.  Did it once.  Thank you, Mistress. 



Rather like other much-maligned minorities, lesbians who happen to have jobs that involve castrating men often lean into the stereotype by embracing the otherwise offensive phrase.  One of Jennifer’s co-workers likes to wear a badge saying “Warning: castrating lesbian”.  It breaks the ice at parties and she does get served very quickly in bars. But she also has to explain to women who are annoyed with their husbands or boyfriends that she can only do it within the legal framework… unless they’re really cute wives and and girlfriends, in which case she’s been known to make an exception.



No, I just wanted to spend a few more seconds staring into those eyes…




Describable agonies

Finally treated as a grown-up!  Looks like all that pleading and whining paid off.


So do I.  That’s why I run this blog.




See, the thing about chastity routines is all those little ‘fines’ and ‘extras’ can really add up.  I’m supposed to be on monthly release but sometimes I can go six months without, what with one thing or another.  And apparently asking what I am being fined for is ‘impertinence’ for which I get an additional three months !  Sometimes it just doesn’t seem fair, although I’m sure she intends it to be.




No, not that kind of cage.  The sort you live in.  Permanently, it would seem.  Interesting philosophical question: if a door is welded shut, is it still a ‘door’?  Something to think about, eh?  You’ll have plenty of time…



I was once told ‘be careful what you wish for’ in femdom but I’ve never really understood why.  I mean I fervently, desperately wish she’d stop whipping me, most days, or I wish in increasing frustration for sexual release.  Neither wish has the slightest effect, so I really don’t see the harm in it.

A few bad men

Let’s hope she learns from this little conundrum.  An espresso machine prepared and ready to go just within button-pressing reach of a pilloried hand and she can have her aching, tearful, regretful husband and a freshly brewed cup, both at the same time. 




Most of the choices I face are no-brainers, which all the women who have ever known me would probably agree is just as well.

Princess Kali, there – lovely and an accomplished author too.



She could even theme your confession with the outfit by putting the lasso of truth around you. That would be a nice, gentle start to what is about to happen.


 

Let’s hope the greeting ritual she chooses is number 17.  I’m particularly good at that one.

 


 

Come on… you’ve got this.  Two pawns down is nothing – you started with ten of them, right?  Something like that.  Try moving one of the little horsey ones.

Fiercely feminine

Take it from me as a long-serving married man, you really don’t want to discuss it.  Let alone ‘discuss’ it.

 

 

 

Obviously.

 

There’s a thin line between chivalry and criminal sexism but fortunately we have women to help police that line – and run the re-education camps for anyone who teeters over it.

 

 

 

He’s just a bit nervous about getting married… which is silly, really, when you think about it.

 

 

 

Actually, the entire blog is literally nothing but a lot of fuss over a little smacked bottom.  With wholly inadequate thinking time set aside for it.


 

Misfortunate males

Oh dear, not again.  You’d think she’d have learnt to be more careful by now.

 

 

 

My SO promised me, when she brought out my first little maid’s dress that if it ever became too humiliating, I could take it off.  So far, apparently it never has – in fact, she generally thinks it’s not humiliating enough – so we’ve not really tested that, but it’s good to know.  Safeguards are important.

 

 


Respect is very important in a marriage.


Young people in love can be so romantic… let’s hope he gets out of their way quickly.




This humble slave once assumed ‘supplication position #3’ to ask its revered and powerful Mistress whether She would gracefully consent to granting Her humble slave the precious gift of a high-protocol BDSM relationship, but she just told it to fuck off and stop being so irritating.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Forceful females, meek males

Oh dear.  You had one job… Well, OK, you had several jobs if you count all the chores and you even had two jobs at a time during the spit-roasting bit but you know what I mean.




It’s their ‘rattan’ anniversary.




Maybe she should.  I hope she makes her mind up quickly rather than dithering about it… odd, because she’s usually very decisive.



 

The extra said yes – well, of course he did – but sadly the scene was cut from the movie.  He has developed quite a successful career though and has now had several minor speaking roles.  He was “Squeaky-voiced guy in elevator” in one of the recent Marvel movies, for instance.

 

 

 

It’s the way she tells them.


 

 

 

 

Lashing out

In case you’re wondering, I’m not doing April Fool’s Day stuff.  I have before.  

One year I warned people in advance that the blog was going to feature occasional fem-sub content, then came up with this.  And then a year later, ran a feature on those mis-understood (and modest and humble) members of our BDSM community: male doms.  Believe me, Contemplating the Divine going M/f is about as likely as the Catholic Church embracing Wicca or a video found on Pornhub being, y’know, any good.

Then another year I did this, which was a bit rubbish but had lots of lovely pictures.

But not this year.  No, really.  This isn’t some kind of self-referential ‘tell them there’s no April Fool joke but then there is’ thing.  Sorry.  Just the usual crap.


 

So much hell to dish out, so little time.  People think the life of an OWK Lady is all lazing around eating peeled grapes, but really it’s all go, all the time.

 

 

 

You want know what I think? I think these are very good ideas and she’s right about this, as she is about everything.  That’s what I think and I’m determined not to think anything else.

 

 

 

The food’s not as good as at a traditional British boarding school, but other than that the lifestyle’s pretty similar, I understand.

 

 

That’s her sweet ‘girl next door’ look.  She has some very scared (and lucky) neighbours.

 

This is the sweet and vanilla Melisande Sin, to be found in a few places in Poland (which Russia would be well advised not to invade because (a) NATO and (b) her).

Still, at least she remembered your anniversary this time.


 

 

 

 

 

Unreasonable demands

She’s embarrassed now… but don’t worry, she has coping techniques for that.

 

 

 

Now come on – man up.  Remember what you all discussed at the last encounter group?  No, no I don’t mean the bit about ironing pleats – about standing up to your wives?  Yeah?  Right then.  Hang on – where are you going?  You can’t stand up to her on your knees!  Oh for goodness’ sake…

 

 

My SO and I have a consensual relationship.  I didn’t want to but she insisted.


They’d starve to death, I expect.  I mean, more of them would than when the Ladies actually are there, anyway.

 

 

 

This photo is actually a rather sophisticated optical illusion.  Many men, seeing it for the first time, don’t notice the slice of pizza, the big red cup, the bottles of water or the coffee maker – even after staring at it for hours.  Something to do with how the brain processes images, I understand.


 

Punishing workloads

…but these ladies always manage to deliver.


It’s a win-win for her, which is just as well because she really hates losing.



Don’t worry about whether you’ll be able to satisfy her. That’s one of the nice things about being a pain toy: she does all the work and you just have to go with the flow.  Let Joy be unconfined.



Necessary suffering, obviously, is something she can fully support.


This is, of course, Miss Chambers, possessor of the finest, most elegant nose in femdom, and to be found (nostalgically) on the Cruella web site.

My own SO, I am glad to say, does not approve of whipping for minor, trivial faults.  I have yet to discover a fault she considers to be minor and trivial, but when I do I am sure that will come as a great relief.




Hmm…  Think think think.  I expect she’ll remember eventually, as long as she’s not distracted by something more important.




Kiss the boys or make them cry

 or both, even.

Nervous young husbands might want to check out Servitor’s old series ‘Seven Secrets of a Happy Marriage‘ which contains about 30 pieces of advice, each one of them as accurate and helpful as the title proclaiming there will be ‘seven’.


Women can often be oddly protective of their shoes, can’t they?  And their panties too, in my experience.  Just ask any of the women in my neighbourhood, or the judge in my court case for that matter.  There’s probably an over-protective, nurturing, nest-building sort of impulse behind it, I expect.  The neighbours I mean, not the judge – she was just doing her job, except when she made me do that little dance dressed up and frillied in front of the court.  Happy days… where was I?  Oh yes.




Fake it to make it and escape it.



 

 

Anyway, you look so cute taking little steps, with the bells hanging from your nipple clamps going jingle jingle jingle.

 

 

If you think the client in question is behaving in a humiliating way, wanking off looking at this lovely lady but not allowed to touch her or her clothing… what does that say about what you’re doing, right now?  Hmm?

 

 

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