|Don’t worry: what it lacks in teasing, it makes up in denial.
|My gender doesn’t so much sit on a spectrum as cower timidly beneath one.
|He’s a bit dim too, to be honest. Well… thick as two short planks, to be quite brutal about it. But she doesn’t seem to mind that, oddly.
|I think she might have had an idea.
|Many women just hate it when important discussions are side-tracked by irrelevant opinions. My SO has very low tolerance for that sort of thing, which is unfortunate as all my opinions are irrelevant.
… that’s what most men need.
|She’s getting mixed signals here. Fortunately, the ones she’s giving are entirely consistent.
|Thank goodness for that.
|My own SO avoids this problem by only fucking guys who despise me. Fortunately, that doesn’t restrict her freedom of action at all.
|Honestly, given the choice between fucking her and fucking you, it’s hard to see how anyone could prefer not to play it straight. But some guys have weird sexual preferences. I’ve heard.
|Actually, I have a funny story about a pair of masturbation gloves and some nettles. Well… it was funny at the time, anyway. For her.
|And if she gets what she wants, you might get what you want. Or you might not.
|She doesn’t want to, and yet…
|Don’t worry – she’s very imaginative, so it’s only going to be on the rarest occasions that you’ll have to fall back on the boring old trope of male ejaculation.
|I’d expected this was going to lead to an uncomfortable conversation but it seems she’s decided to skip the conversation part.
|Why not both?
|Thinking about her being clammy makes me clammy…
|If you’re finding it difficult to relax, try explaining to her that you’d just rather she got a second opinion from a male dentist before drilling. I’m sure she won’t mind.
|Obviously. Although it looks like it’s already got a lot of toppings, so maybe no need?
|I have to admit she’s right there.
|Breaking up is always painful – this no more so than most.
|Silly old Kurt – fucks my wife, takes my money… I think he’s just covering up feelings of insecurity.
|No regrets, though. She doesn’t allow them.
|Awww…., isn’t she sweet? How could anyone say no to that?
- Indiferent denial, with a warning
- Denial with retribution
- Desperate pleading
- Amused denial
|You can get an app for it too. Every day, it doesn’t remind you.
|He thought if he told them he was a vicar they’d go easy on him. He was wrong. My friend who’s an investment banker had a similar experience but much, much worse.
|Fortunately, the balls don’t feel like the same thing either. No more worrying about that knee! But there are other things to worry about…
|I didn’t understand why it had to be so wide, but then I met Richard.