boots – Contemplating the divine

Memories, reposted for technical reasons

Apologies – not a new post. For a long time I have been getting 4-5 obviously automated and spammy comments per day, all of them on this post which was published on June 15th. I don’t want to restrict commenting, so I have been deleting them manually. But it’s getting worse and today I got about 30. All on the one post… which is pretty f***ing stupid even for an algorithm. As of now I don’t get such spam on any other posts.

Yeah, I do have a spam filter but these comments get past it. They’re all from different usernames, they are marginally plausible looking text (“Hi, I really like this blog, so well written” kind of thing, but with numerous variations) and they come from various domains.

So… desperate measures and all that. I deleted the original post and I am creating a new post here with the same content. I hope that this will result in the algorithm not being able to comment at all… rather than being unable to comment on this post, it starts trying to comment on other posts. If it does, then with apologies I’ll have to do something like start pre-approving comments etc. But for now, let’s just see how we do.

Some of the generic messages are actually quite funny, given the content of the blog and the post below especially. e.g. “My co-workers think I’m wasting too much time reading this blog, but it gives me so much useful information for my life.” I’d certainly like to have seen the spammer who designed the algorithm spend some time in the OWK.

Yes, it’s time for more of those highly inaccurate (and entirely made-up) reminiscences by the very first contingent of Ladies from the Other World Kingdom. Blatant homage or affectionate rip-off? Or should that be the other way around? You decide. Or don’t, if you’d rather not.

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The Facility

New occasional theme that’ll be included in regular posts from time to time, but I thought I’d introduce it in a themed post. Brutal, non-consensual – if you don’t like those things… well, you’re probably reading the wrong blog to begin with, quite frankly.

Embarassing observations

The untruths hurt, sometimes.

Wise submissive husbands will keep a notebook, recording name, orgasm frequency, cock size and any remarks their wives made the next morning. Cuckoldry doesn’t have to be something merely done to you, you see – you can help her with it.

She can wait – as can he, actually, although he might feel right now as if he can’t.

If you get really good at the ‘guess the voltage’ game, a career as a circuit tester awaits.

If it goes into the mouth and down the throat, then it’s edible, right? And she always makes sure that it does.

You’ve already taken the most important vows, anyway.

Bending to her will

Let’s hope Julie’s not still upset about that bad performance review. Sometimes feedback can be unpleasant and hard to take – but it just has to be accepted. I hope she understands that.

Remember you’re an individual: you’re not defined entirely by what’s written on your collar.

Ah, teenage masturbation! Goodness, that seems so long ago now. How lucky I am that my SO has put all that well and truly behind me.

The boots are a lot tastier than the airline food.

The female orgasm can be a mysterious – and very painful – thing.

Sourness and light

If any of you do have any nasty little habits – particularly if you happen to be indulging them right now – I suggest you visit a specialist like her. That’s what I do.

Lesbian slavegirls don’t really understand male sexuality, of course, which is probably why so many of them featured on this blog want to suppress or even abolish it.

Think of your retirement as a second childhood; that’s certainly how the staff see it.

Choosing the first option is likely to result in very drastic, rapid weight loss.

How did the conversation get onto this topic, anyway, what’s what I want to know?

Inexorable romantics

You know, sometimes I think women use ‘You’re washing my hair that night’ as an excuse, when they don’t want to go out. A bit like “Sorry, I’m just not in the mood to unlock you this month, I’ve got a headache.”

The glamorous life of an OWK Lady. Tomorrow, she’ll be going out for a slow plod around the grounds atop a human pony. Thrilling stuff.

What a bit of luck that she decided to have a meathook fitted, when she moved in.

Don’t worry, she’s very experienced. She’ll know exactly what to do.

And remember it’s a ‘fee’, not ‘tribute’, OK? It’s still going to be a suitably large number, though.

So… do you remember my post a few weeks ago, suggesting that the divine Anya rocks a dominant, fetish fashion look slightly more often than one might expect? Well, of course, the trouble with making that sort of statement is that you just know she’s going to prove you wrong immediately by showing up to every event for the next six months or so in a succession of elegant but disappointingly vanilla outfits. Yeah, that’s definitely what should have happened, by the law of averages, reversion to the mean, all that.

Only to be expected, I’m afraid.

Except she didn’t.

See if, in this picture from Michelle Yeoh’s recent Oscar celebration, you can spot a subtle difference in style between Goddess Anya’s look at and that of… oh all the people there who aren’t Anya, if you can bring yourself to waste any time looking at them.

What’s that? You want to see more of her in the dress? Yes, I expect you would – there are some at this link, others around. You like that sort of thing, being a pervert, right? That’s OK, we’re all perverts here. But be warned, let’s keep those expectations realistic, yeah? We all know what ‘femdom in mainstream’ fashion shots are like. Sadly, even when a glamorous actress puts on some kind of fetishy outfit, she’s still just going to pout for the camera in vanilla style, right? I mean, sorry to disappoint you, but it’s not as if she’s going to be photographed in the kind of haughty dominatrix pose that you and I find exciting, right?

Right?

Oh.

Hmmm.

Relationships founded on respect

Not mutual respect, obviously. No fun in that.

Go on, it’s an opportunity to show off your strength. Girls like that.

An optional 150% service charge will be added to his bill, but of course it’s entirely at her discretion.

I don’t think ‘we’ are going to be doing a lot of talking, except of the begging and pleading variety. Same as usual.

There are penalties for average scores below ‘B’ and rewards for slaves receiving an overall ‘A’, although no one has ever found out what those rewards might be. This guy here is averaging a ‘G’, but then he is very experienced and well-trained so it’s not surprising he’s doing so well.

We were bent over the desk, dreading every stroke, I think, if I remember rightly – and wondering why we can’t just enjoy normal sex, like normal people do.

Delightfully despotic

Better do as she says. But with dignity, right? Always with dignity.

For those of you objecting that getting an erection is a natural reaction to the situation, merely an expression of sexual desire, should realise that exactly the same argument applies to her giving you powerful electric shocks.

She needn’t hurry. This isn’t going to be over any time soon. Not ever, actually.

She’s not saying it’s a hard limit, mind.

Maybe since she broke her side of the bargain, you should ask for all the presents back? It’s only fair. Admittedly, fairness has never really been big in this relationship.

When life gives you lemons…

…strap him down to a table, clip his eyelids open and squeeze the juice into them.

Too unpleasant for you? Then you definitely will not want to watch this clip of women (as the title indicates) brutally torturing men to death.

No, seriously, you won’t. That clip is not some kind of happy S&M consensual game, nor are the terrified victims saved at the last minute from the evil torturers (don’t you hate it when that happens in mainstream movies?). It is possibly the most unpleasant, brutal mainstream clip I have ever seen. Very nasty stuff.

I mean, who could possibly enjoy that sort of thing? You’d have to be a truly sick weirdo to get any kind of sexual pleasure from that. Simply horrible, it is. Vile.

Mmmm.

Anyway, on we go!

Some poor sod’s going to have to clean that up, you know.

‘Non-lethal’ is how I like my femdom play.

Yes, let’s hope Ellie doesn’t take it out on them. She’d got a terrible temper, you know.

The people have spoken… the ones wanking online, anyway, and that’s good enough for her.

Thank goodness none of that applies to any of us, eh readers? Imagine the (fully justified) self-loathing you’d have to feel to get off on something like this.

Resolute women

They always make sure that their New Year resolutions are kept.

It’s odd, because generally she prefers to be asked for her approval for everything I do.

Now this one’s just putting on a show of indifference to suit the ‘callous uncaring domme’ persona. Inside, she’s a swirling mess of worry that licking up cow shit might make you horribly ill, but she is concealing it – true professional that she is.

She does teasing and denial play too. That’s when you pay her and fuck off, frustrated and lonely. It’s only very subtly different from the findomme variant, to be honest.

Happiest day of your life, boy. Remember that.

Looks like she has stuff lying around the house she doesn’t need or want any more. Many people do, at this time of year. Best to just take the bold decision to throw it out, rather than leave it cluttering the place up. She won’t regret it.