panties – Contemplating the divine

Ghastly perversions

She finds she meets interesting people when she walks you in the park. And tedious but enslaveable ones too.

She’s a very spiritual person, as you can tell.

I don’t know what the bad things were in my brain that the doctor removed but there must have been a lot of them, because it’s very empty now. Thank goodness I have a loving wife to remember things for me.

The taste of ‘shut the fuck up’ will always be associated for me with the sharp, painful feeling of ‘because I say so’.

Or he won’t. Whatever.

Being the best she can make me

You know, there are whole ‘pick-up artist’ sites that are all about how to get women to take their panties off, but none of them have hit upon this very simple technique. It’s just about understanding her needs, really.

I would. I wonder what it would have felt like.

Going to be a long, hot summer.

More women suffer from having excessively deep vaginas than many men realise – almost everyone I’ve been on a date with has had that problem, remarkably.

It’s a form of ‘one woman one vote’ system.

Further details available here.

Heels over head in love

Like many submissive men, I pay not to have sex.

At school, once, this boy and I were talking about some girl and he said “I’d like to get in her knickers!” So when, a few weeks later, after a midnight excursion, I was able to tell him I was in her knickers, I thought he’d be jealous. But he wasn’t, oddly enough. It was just a misunderstanding. How we laughed. The whole class laughed, if I remember rightly.

Benji is actually the Honourable Sir Benjamin Kettleworth-Harcourt, FRCS, but of course he can neither remember nor pronounce that.

Married couples should talk about their interests more.

How does she know I’m scrumptious? I didn’t detect a French accent, there.