Dimpled divinity – Contemplating the divine

She’s got it

And she’s quite prepared to use it, so stop arguing and bend over.

There’s obviously no inherent contradiction in describing something as both ‘a traditional costume’ and ‘a spanking dress’. Just ask the ladies or – when they’ve finished standing in the corner – the men of the Czech Republic.

It’s shocking the state some of these railway station toilets get into. Thank goodness there are public-spirited people like her prepared to step up and do something about it.

At least she mentioned it, first. It’s actually quite offensive, the way so many women consider castrated males’ bodies almost to be public property – just reaching out for a little pat without asking permission.

Ironically enough, those discussions tend to be anything but ‘instant’, often going on for hours.

See, that’s a Mars/Venus thing right there. The male naturally focuses on the physical cause of his pain but the woman looks beyond these trivial mechanical explanations for the underlying psychological reason. Like during a beating: it’s not the whip she’s cracking across your back that’s hurting you, it’s your own behaviour.

I have follow-up questions… Let’s hope she doesn’t consider them impertinent – oh, who am I kidding? Let’s hope she does.

Someone to look up to

What she doesn’t realise is that I always do my best… it’s just usually rubbish, that’s all. Fortunately, I’ve had a lot of practice at scurrying.

She can resist anything except temptation.

At the OWK there’s always a bucket available, in case one of the slaves feels sick. Usually it’s just the bucket the food comes in, actually.

Of course, I don’t necessarily know that this is actually what happened behind closed doors, and I’m just imagining a scene that happens to fit what I would like it to have been. So… just like the actual series, The Crown, then.

His name won’t go down in the record books along with hers, but his scream will be what a lot of viewers remember, when watching the footage of that historic day. Plus, he got to attend the medal ceremony, curled up and sobbing on the grass by the podium. It did delay his trip to hospital but how many times in your life are you going to be the target of a world-record ball-busting kick?

I guess he was asking for it. But not paying… so unfair.

Pointing turns

Yup, those. Number forty in an occasional… forty? Forty?? Bloody hell, how long have I been doing this blog?

Kind of antelope, right?

Reigning in my heart

It’s best if she doesn’t do any rowing, as she wouldn’t want to work up a sweat and ruin the shoot… anyway, that’s what she brought you for. Don’t worry, she’ll probably do some paddling later, when the two of you are back at the hotel.

So much better to come to a negotiated settlement like this than have an unpleasant fight in court. More fun for her, too.

Not a good morning for her, not going to be a good evening for you. Consequences, remember?

She’s multi-tasking: doing stuff and ignoring you.

If you want to dispute the analogy, I’m sure she’d be only too happy to force your feet into a nice pair of 5-inch heels for the last two flights.

I think Ryan would definitely say it’s up to her.

Thanks be to women

Aw… he’s going to be all bashful and get confused as he tries to stutter out his question, now. But she won’t mind: she’s nice.

My own employer set up a taskforce to evaluate some external dominatrix service providers – we trialled five of them, which was a bit exhausting for me, as the only male on the team. In the end, though, the choice was easy as the cheapest option surprisingly also turned out to be the most painful. It pays to shop around.

So, ermmm, what are you both up to these days? Apart from this, obviously.

A pair of wonderful French dominatrices there: on the right, the talented and beautiful Maîtresse Blanche who has had the dubioius pleasure of inserting various medical things into Servitor and peeing on me, while on the left I believe is la talentueuse et belle Maîtresse Euryale, who probably has much better facilities into which to relieve herself… but I hope some day may yet find a stinking load of raw, untreated Servitor piled up on her doorstep needing humane disposal.

It’s important not to boil them for too long or you can lose the flavour.

It’s nice to have a change of scene but you know what it’s like with holidays… 24 hours after you get home it’s as if you never left.

Give me the real thing any day. I believe Ms Cassie Hunter is on the shortlist to star in the new one: 50 Shades: Black and Blue.