Meek and feeble

He’s made a lifetime commitment.
My SO always says a bit of bruising on a man’s face can be quite attractive, anyway.
 Actually, the market is a bit limited as sissy husbands tend not to have much time for reading, or a lot of pocket money.
It’s all a bit academic (if you’ll pardon the pun), actually, because the school moved four years ago and there isn’t actually a Staircase B any more.  Still, that’s no excuse for not memorising the rule properly, is it, boy?

I think the correct response is “Mmmmphh!”

Phone protocol

Lovemachine Serviceline, I’m Karen, how can I help?

It’s to do with your sexbot?  OK.  Is
there a problem?

Oh.  If there’s no problem then why did you…?

You just want to tell me how wonderful
is?  Everything about her is perfect?  OK sir.  Well, that’s very nice. Now, if you don’t
mind, I’l
l – 

She’s a series 5800?  Wow. 
Top of the range, huh? No wonder you’re so pleased with her.

‘She’s beautiful and you’re a lucky man
even to be granted the privilege of licking her boots?’ 
I think maybe I’m getting the idea. 
Can you tell me which programme you’re running?


Domina Deborah”?  I see. 
And you’re running that right now, I take it?  How’s that been going?

You have been ‘lucky enough to be granted
the honour of serving her and being corrected for your many faults’.  Ooh. You had the setting all the way up to
10, didn’t you?
What’s that?  Yes, I imagine you would have to be grateful.  Very grateful indeed.  I’ve seen the specs for the programme.  She’s not an easy lady to please, is she?  

OK, well it’s easy enough to fix.  There’s  a small switch behind her ear, so if you reach up, you can – 

‘You’re not allowed to raise your head above her knee height’?  Yeah, OK, I can see that would be difficult.  Can you try just reaching up and –

Ooh – that sounded nasty!  Are you all right?

Yes, I suppose you are ‘a very lucky boy to have such a beautiful Mistress play close attention to you’, aren’t you?  Sounds like you’re going to need the reset safeword before she pays you so much attention you lose consciousness.

The reset safeword.

You did create a reset safeword
before running the programme?

Why don’t you men ever read instructions?  Then you’re a very silly boy, aren’t you? Are you going to ask me nicely
for the default reset

No, more nicely than that.  Call me Mistress Karen.

Well that’s not a very nice word is it? I
don’t think
Deborah is going to like that.  Hello?



Oh well. 
Cos if you’d asked really nicely, I could even have done a remote
reset.  But you didn’t. So I won’t.

Lovemachine Serviceline.  I’m Karen, how can I help?

If it’s Friday, this must be Belgium

Regular readers will know that occasionally I depart from the fantasy theme of this blog to give practical, down-to-earth advice to subs on visiting dommes. See this, this or this, or even this for example.

But my stats tell me that this blog has readers from all over the world and especially the USA, so I was thinking it might be time for a post especially for the American subs.  No – I don’t mean one using particularly short and simple words.  I do that anyway, because I am well aware that many of this blog’s readers are male and I don’t think it’s fair to make it too difficult for them to follow, in the brief amount of computer time they’re allowed.  I mean a post that helps US visitors to Europe navigate the complex but fascinating cultural backwaters my tired old continent possesses. 

So here – in a bid to alienate the majority of my readership – is some advice to a US sub, visiting Europe. Have a nice day now, y’hear?



And when he pulls his frilly nylon panties right up tight

…He feels a dedicated follower of fashion

Oh yes he is (oh yes he is)

But you get bigger tips, so maybe it’s nearly even.

There!  Now who can still claim that men can’t take on front-line combat roles?
I’ve heard chlorinated water can be quite good for cuts and bleeding welts, so maybe if you ask nicely she’ll ask them to dip you in the pool when you’re done.

Yet oddly enough, he still gets it wrong. Men and housework… will they ever learn?

Sissy fights always end the same way, at least when wives are around to step in.

The record shows I took the blows

And did it Her way

Yum.  Has it really been a year? How time flies.

No problem.  I’ll just go and live out the remainder of my life nursing the ache at the core of my empty existence.  Bye.

Actually, if you save up enough of your pocket money, maybe you could… I mean, that would be OK, right?  About four months should do it, if you’re careful not to spend money on anything else.

Well, I think it’s outrageous. I mean, she wouldn’t wear a coat that had been made by killing and skinning a human being, would she?

Don’t forget to say gracias.  Mucho, mucho gracias, Senora

Of academic interest

In a change to the usual format, today we are publishing the preamble to an academic sociology thesis.  Pretty hot, huh?  You don’t get that on Men in Pain or Cum Eating Cuckolds, do you?  Can’t imagine why not…

Extract from Male Liberation Theory: prevention and cure, a thesis submitted for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy in the Department of Sociology (Male Studies Unit)
Sheila Harrietsdaughter, King’s College, Cambridge, May 2086.

Alan Travis (as he was named at birth) is one of the more
interesting revisionist male liberation theorists. Reading his books in
sequence provides an insight into a fascinating philosophical journey.  Born into a society almost unimaginable today, in which women had achieved mere ‘equality’ in society with men, he lived through the most profound and joyful social changes – changes that he, like many males, struggled at first to accept.  His early works are hard to obtain, but even
the list of titles evokes the dilemmas he was forced to confront, as he redefined his views on male liberation and as his thought
developed and matured.  A selective biography

  • Grateful thoughts from a
    male feminist: how the women’s rights movement has given us all a more
    equal society
  • De-gendering social change:
    the role of male allies in transformative feminist thought
  • Let men help: the concept of
    sexism and its interpretation by feminists and their male allies
  • Women’s rights, political
    correctness and male identity
  •  A united front against
    sexism? The value of male voices in the feminist movement
  • Not ‘all’ men are bastards:
    deconstructing the divisive rhetoric of the ‘new’ women’s movement
  • Reverse oppression? Sexism
    and the ‘new’ women’s movement
  • Criminalising men: sexist
    jokes are not ‘rape’
  • The enemy within?  Male
    supporters of the ‘new’ women’s movement
  • No votes, no voice – men’s
    place in the ‘new society’
  • We will not be silenced:
    free speech and the prohibition of ‘sexist views’
    (2025 – unpublished)
  • Second class citizens? 
    Men in the ‘New Society’
    (2026 – unpublished)
  • Voices in the darkness: the
    testimony of male victims of the ‘New Society’
    (2028? Published informally
    by the men’s underground movement)
  • Men’s Liberation – A

    (2030? Published informally by the men’s underground movement)
  • “Writing this line over and
    over again will help me to learn that my own opinions are of no
    importance: women are in charge and we males will do as we are
    told.”  20,000 lines written in Re-education Camp 9, published in six
    writing as ‘Prisoner M847733847’)
  • Eating dogshit – grateful
    reflections on a re-educational stay
    (2043 – published by the Department of Male
    Education and Correction, as part of their ‘The life that awaits you’
    series for schools).
  • Male Liberation – who needs

    (2044, writing as Alan Lucysboy)
  • Why I do not miss my penis –
    and nor does anyone else!
    (2048, writing as Alan Lucysboy)
  • Much-needed correction: a
    humble appreciation of the first 25 years of the New Society by a
    well-disciplined male
    (2051, writing anonymously as ‘Boy – aged
  • Pleats and seams – the
    complete guide

    (2056, writing as Alan Elainesboy, Volume 13 in Ironing for Men).
  • What silly boys we were: a
    personal recollection of the Male Liberation movement and its ridiculous
    writing as Alan Elainesboy).

  • Good for nothing – a last
    testament from a soon-to-be euthanised surplus male
    (2068, published posthumously
    as Alan Nobodysboy).

By chance, the last item on this prolific list of
publications was discovered by a worker at the male disposal plant who had read
and greatly enjoyed some of Alan’s later works. 
Accordingly, rather than being boiled down for glue, his body was taken
to King’s College in Cambridge, where he had held a fellowship until 2025.  He was stuffed and mounted in a corner of the
dining hall, where he remains today, in mute testimony to the remarkable
achievement of the New Society in convincing even its most strident critics of
the justice of female supremacy. 

This thesis is concerned with why Alan altered his views so
profoundly in mid-life.  Of course, a
facile answer is “Because he spent over ten years in a re-educational camp
being starved,  whipped, electrocuted and forced to eat excrement”. 
Indeed, a cursory reading of some of his later works, notably Eating Dogshit (2043), would seem to confirm
this.  However, I believe that a closer
examination of his works points to a more fundamental realisation and acceptance of his own
inferiority, and by returning to the original manuscripts of his texts –
including the profoundly moving 20,000 Lines, stained in places with the
philosopher’s own tears – I intend to show that…
(and so on and so on for another 98,000 words.  I’ll post the rest some time when I have nothing better to do and the Internet really needs another PhD thesis).  

Let’s just finish with the photo appendix.  What do you mean, real PhD theses don’t have photo appendices?  My own thesis, submitted last year, had over 3000 images.  It still rankles that they rejected it.  Call themselves a Women’s Studies department and what do they do when someone submits a thesis that entirely consists of studying women, close up and personal?  They call it ‘porn’.  Oh well.  “Dr Servitor” sounds a bit weird anyway.  Back to Dr Harrietsdaughter’s work:

Plate 10: This photograph, used to illustrate one of Alan’s early works, has
puzzled researchers for years. Captioned merely “The worm that turned”
it appears at first sight to show an ordinary unit of Re-education Corps
Servicewomen going about their work.  However, the Corps was not established until 2030: 11 years
after the book in which it appeared.  Furthermore, the Corpswomen are wearing extremely small shorts, indicating a hot summer day, yet the weather appears to be anything but hot.  Research into the undeleted
fragments of the Male Internet (access permitted under scholastic
exception), associates it only with the phrase “The two Ronnies”, who were presumably early female supremacist thinkers both called Ronald, whose work has now been lost.

Plate 13.  This illustration, from No votes, No voice (2023, restricted access), reproduces a poster widely used by the male resistance.  Titled “The Future Under The New Society”, the poster was presumably intended to alarm males and to encourage them to cast their votes (odd as it is today, to contemplate males voting) for masculinist parties. However, in a classic example of male incompetence, the poster backfired and is credited with boosting the New Society vote by ten percentage points or more among males, who seem to have found the image attractive.  Such self-defeating displays of stupidity were a recurring feature in the male resistance movement, as Alan himself thankfully recorded in What Silly Boys We Were (2061).

 Plate 19: Malcolm Harris. Harris collaborated with Alan on some of his early works, in particular the so-called Men’s Liberation Manifesto (not available for public distribution),
several versions of which circulated secretly among subversive males
around 2030.  Harris believed that only violent action could overthrow
the New Society, leading a party of armed subversives hiding out in the
Yorkshire Dales for over two years, before being betrayed by a
submissive male posing under-cover.  Harris made occasional covert radio
broadcasts, including the famous “Call to Arms” of 2031, which Alan
described as ‘inspiring’ at the time, but later admitted to have been “a
petulant stamp of the foot: a tantrum by a spoilt brat who was
severely overdue for a spanking.”. The photograph shows the former
Harris (renamed ‘Scrub’) some years later.

24: This photograph shows ‘Prisoner M847733847 during his years in a
re-educational camp.  Note the penis: in these early years of the New
Society, male re-educational inmates typically retained their penises
and testicles, although in most cases these items became too damaged to
function as a result of the repeated application of increasingly
sophisticated re-educational techniques

The re-educational officer to the right of the Prisoner, Karen Susansdaughter, was by chance a former student of his when he had lectured at Cambridge.  Interviewed in the course of research for this thesis, she cheerfully recalled how pleased she had been to discover him in her cell block, and the many opportunities it provided to reprise their warm disagreements over female supremacist philosophy.  The officer to the left has not been identified but may be the “Anna” whose name was branded onto Alan’s thigh at some point during his stay.

Plate 27: an illustration from Eating Dogshit (2043). Note the  lemon slice on the side of the bowl, which has caused much confusion to historians of the period.  In contrast to some erroneous claims made regarding this image (e.g. Too soft on the bastards? Re-education camps in the early years of the New Society in The United Queendom, Francine Fille-de-Marie (2062)), this does not represent an actual food bowl from Prisoner M847733847’s re-educational camp. Rather, in the second chapter of Eating Dogshit (op .cit.), the author eloquently describes the essential pleasures of drinking a bowl of clean slightly lemony water, presumably after his release, to establish a contrast for the chapters that follow, which describe the experience of being forced to eat dogshit in the detail that is now familiar to generations of male teenagers from compulsory study classes (but are best avoided by female citizens without very strong stomachs).  

These chapters can be envisioned simply through their evocative titles:  “The Smell”, “First Refusal and its Consequences”, “Begging Permission to Eat”, “First Taste”, “Second Refusal and its Consequences”, “The First Mouthful“, “The First Swallow”, “Pleading for Water”, “The Whip”, “The Second Mouthful”, “Chewing”, “Swallowing”, “Vomiting”, “The Whip, once more”, “Re-ingesting”, “Licking the Bowl, “Gratitude”, “Once is not Enough”, “No Easier the Third Time”, “A Weekly Dogshit Day”, “Attempted Suicide”, “My Life is not My Own to Take”, “Grateful Acceptance and Weekly Treats”, “An Aftertaste for Life”.

Plate 28: Alan and his first Responsible Female, Lucy Deborahsdaughter, enjoy a riding holiday in France.  Riding became an increasingly important part of Alan’s life in his Lucysboy period and the couple were a familiar sight around the hills and lanes of West Derbyshire, where they lived.  Alan’s waning strength as he aged led Lucy first to castrate him, in the (mistaken) belief that geldings are stronger and then to sell him on e-bay.  
Although academic institutions bid for him, keen to possess such a well-known figure on the philosophical landscape, Lucy decided in the event on a private sale because, as she put it “the little bastard needs to work for his keep, not laze around on display in a museum”.  His eventual buyer cheerfully admitted that she had never heard of him or read anything he had written – nor indeed ever did she.  But it was to be in Elaine Ruthsdaughter’s laundry room that Alan was finally to discover a philosophy of contentment – and personal happiness at last.
Plate 32: This image, from the frontispiece to Pleats and Seams (2056) shows Alan soon after Elaine Ruthsdaughter became his Responsible Female.  Often treated merely as a practical guide to ironing, of no use to anyone except household sissies, this work can also be read (albeit at the price of extreme tedium for the average citizen, who will never have to iron a pleat in her life) as a subtle and mature work reflecting on how males can find purpose in menial acts that provide some service to the superior sex.  As Helga Fridastochter has written in Spanked, Serving and Satisfied (2072): “There can be few intellectual journeys more inspiring than that of Alan Travis, from the petulant claim in 2019 that men’s self-realisation demanded full participation in the government of society, to Elaine’s happy houseboy, ecstatically recalling her murmur of ‘good boy’ following four hours of work on one of her long pleated skirts that he loved so much.”


As they say about President Knavs’s husband’s tweets: I think the title speaks for itself.

I understand more and more people these days are digging out cellar* conversions, creating lots of lovely extra space down there, far, far down beneath sound-proofed floors.


They could go down to the cellar* and play with her toys.

* still ‘basement’

I’ve got a special brown card – it’s kind of the opposite of a loyalty scheme.  Hotels and airlines treat me like dirt wherever I go.

 I wrote a story about loyalty cards once.  That was when I wrote stories featuring the first domme I ever visited and her friend. They appear briefly in this one, under false names.  

But this was my favourite from back then.

I dunno. Feels a bit weird, trying on her dead dad’s dresses.  Don’t know why.

Apparently she does humiliation scenes too.  She just doesn’t always know when she’s doing one.

It’s savage and it’s cruel

And it shines like destruction.

Sometimes without even noticing they exist.
The previews of the show are incredibly positive.  “Massively talented”, “Genius”, “Art’s new guru”. She’s certainly done something to impress the critics.

As I’ve mentioned before, I think men with an interest in maledom could learn a lot from a dominant woman with the right approach.

Tsk. That’s no comfort.  They’re usually so interested in each other, they might forget about me for days at a time.

I suppose the neck belt might interest someone.  And the very clean decor.

If you are not fully satisfied…

Hi, is that Mr Williams?
Oh, good afternoon, Mr Williams.  My name’s Debbie.  I’m with Trading Standards.
No, nothing wrong at all. 
Actually, I’ve got some quite good news for you. We’ve recently prosecuted a company
called A.G. Trading for fraud and as part of the settlement, they are paying
compensation to affected customers. You’re down as having purchased items
regularly from them over the last three years or so, and so you’re due for a
substantial payment.
A. G. Trading. No, I expect you won’t have heard of them,
they operated lots of different front companies.  Let’s see… you’ve made purchases from, erm…
“Mistress Alicia Amazon”, “Sheila’s Stinky Socks” and “Patricia the Piss
Queen”, is that right?
No?  Oh.
Are you sure?  “Harold
Williams, number 73 Park Road, Guildford”? 
Credit card number 5847 624 – Oh, OK.  So that is
you? Great.
Yes, it’s easy to forget these things.
So, the fraud concerned a number of different product lines
but all in the category of ‘used and worn items’, you see, Mr Williams.  Mostly lingerie, socks, shoes and boots –
that kind of thing.  Tampons and sanitary
towels too, but I don’t see any purchases like that on your record.
Anyway, the whole thing was a scam, I’m afraid.  The proprietor, Mr Patel, and his family
mostly just wore the items themselves. 
Some of them were shipped over from India – seems there’s quite a little
business going on pre-soiling items for masturbatory purposes out there.
There’s a whole village where it sounds like everyone’s walking around in
lingerie and high heels just to get the smells in.  And I’m afraid the only person pissing in
Patricia’s panties was Mr Patel’s cousin Rajesh.
Yes, it’s shocking isn’t it? 
Mr Patel made over £20 million out of it, before we got involved – can
you believe that?  All by exploiting
lonely, desperate sad little men.
No offence.
Anyway, if I can just run through the purchases we’ve got
here we can sort out your claim?
So: I’ve got nine pairs of worn panties, three of them
pissed in, a pair of scuffed trainers, two pairs of boots, eleven pairs of
socks, two bras and a sweat-stained top, is that right?  For a total expenditure of £3,540.  
No, you don’t have to produce the items, Mr Williams.  We have all the records here.  Anyway, some of these purchases go back over
three years. I don’t suppose you’d have kept them around all this time, would you?  That would be –
Have you?  Gosh.
Erm… even the items from ‘Patricia the Piss Queen’…?
Anyway, that’s not necessary, Mr Williams.  Actually, you should probably dispose of the
items.  Especially those you ordered
from, erm, ‘Patricia’.  Our colleagues in
Health and Safety say they probably don’t meet EU hygiene standards.
Did you?  Oh, I voted
Remain myself.  Still, EU or no EU, it’s
probably not a good idea to keep that sort of thing around, Mr Williams. You might want to go for a health check.
Now, I’ll send you a claim form, and you just have to fill
it in and send it straight back and we’ll arrange for your compensation, as son
as we can.
Hmm?  Oh, it depends
on how much is recovered by the auditors. 
Should be at least a third of what you paid, though – over £1000, I
expect!  Quite a nice little windfall,
isn’t it?  You could go out and treat
yourself to something nice, like…
Erm… well, anything you like, really.   Not my business to ask!
Now, Mr Williams, is there anything you’d like to ask me?
I’m sorry, what’s that?
Erm… no, I’d rather not, if you don’t mind, Mr
Williams.  I just… well, I just buy things for
my own use then I wash them or throw them away, you know? 
That’s what most people do.  Anyway, Trading Standards Officers aren’t allowed to conduct private business, so…
No – no problem at all! 
To be honest, you’re not the only person who’s asked since I started
this assignment! 
No, I’m not going to tell you what colour they are, Mr
Williams.  Goodbye now!
No, Mr Williams. 
That’s private.  Goodbye, Mr Williams!


Eugh eugh EUGH!

Dave, can you do my next call?  I’ve got to go and wash my face.
And can we PLEASE swap? Honestly, I’d so much rather deal with VAT fraud. You wouldn’t believe how much I’d like to deal with VAT fraud.

I wanna

be her dog?


He’ll be paying rent to her as well.  The monthly rate is a very reasonable “everything”.

Mistress Akella, there, showing how patient dommes need to be at times.

Oh, I don’t suppose Janice would mind.  She’s very easygoing.  As long as you stay on the leash, you can pretty much do your own thing when she’s not around. It’s that kind of marriage.

In OWK, slaves aren’t judged on whether they fail or succeed.  Just on how badly they fail.

She seems nice. Remember, though: it is very unprofessional to get involved romantically with your clients.  So don’t even think about it.

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