public – Contemplating the divine

That’s what she said

Don’t make her say it twice.

I’m sure Julie won’t mind at all but it’s always polite to ask.

My SO likes to play this game and would you believe it, I’ve lost 23 times in a row. What are the odds?* I would say I’m very unlucky but I’m so lucky to be married to such a wonderful lady, that would be churlish.

* Just over one in ten million. “Do the maths” – as a Governess I used to visit used to say – “then bend over the punishment bench so I can do the marking”.

Many relationships that end in divorce could actually be saved if only the woman were prepared to make her husband do the work.

There’s usually a little crowd of embarassed-looking beta-boys waiting outside that club, so you can pass the time in awkward chats with them. You can bond over lucky you all are to have the opportunity perhaps to be useful to your goddesses, boyfriend jealousy issues, how you deal with chafing from your chastity belts and all that kind of subbie stuff. As long as she’s given permission, obviously.

He must have made a mistake.

The divine Mistress Akella, there.

It’s about time an A-list star called out these creepy publications that use images of actresses without permission, to titillate their sad and perverted readership. This blog applauds Ms Scarlett’s courage in speaking out.

His purpose in life

Yeah, she’s very generous with her slaves’ time. Well, there’s plenty and it’s not like she needs or wants it all.

Wow – it doesn’t get better for a submissive than that! Well… maybe just a little better.

I once told a domme in session I was too cold and she promised to warm me up with her paddle, but after that I was still cold – just in pain, too. Of course, I didn’t tell her, after she’d been so thoughtful.

They’ll expect a tip of course.

The ‘sadistic dentist’ trope is so annoying to the profession. A survey found that only 42% of female dentists gained sexual pleasure from inflicting intense pain, which is actually slightly below the percentage in the general female population. And of those, no more than a third said they fantasised about having a man helpless in their chair and drilling for fun. So the next time you’re visitng for a routine check-up just try to remember that and relax, OK?

Kitten wouldn’t mind giving a pay piggie like you a blow job but she’s read up on it and apparently that’s only for sugar daddies and she does so want to do this right.

Fateful decisions

Fateful for you, that is. The decisions are hers alone.

I think there’s room for some negotiation here, where by ‘negotiation’ I mean abject and unconditional begging for her forgiveness and scurrying off to do exactly what she said.

It’s one of his domme’s favourite activities. The local pet supply shop does so well out of her, the owners sent her a Christmas card.

Ooh – sounds like she might be about to give you a second chance! Guess that cheesy chat-up line worked after all, huh?

‘Dress for success’, that’s her motto.

Next, I expect she’ll ask about what happens when you plug it into the electrical mains and turn the dial. They always do… those that don’t just try it for themselves without asking.

I’ve never understood guys who get sexual pleasure from tying up or gagging women. If she can’t speak, how can she order you about? Anyway, such men are nasty perves who enjoy hurting people, and there should be zero tolerance of that, so I’m sure they deserve whatever these two public-spirited ladies and their friends have planned.

Control the beast

You should care about her a lot more than she cares about you. But you probably do anyway, even without realising it.

It’s only about 40 minutes walk, in those high heels. And at her very reasonable tribute rates, that’s only a little more expensive than taking… oh, a helicopter, I suppose?

Don’t worry, they’ve all given their consent: in fact, they renew that consent in a lovely little ceremony every morning, just after the 5am work detail finishes.

Oooh – that’ll be your first discussion as a married couple! I wonder if it will feel different?

In the event, Treasure decided to keep the jar. It’s not that she wants to look at the disgusting thing, but she said she likes to know it’s there, you know? And I suppose it has sentimental value for you, too, so maybe she was thinking of that as well.

I hope the boys appreciate how pretty it is, this time, rather than just ripping it off.

She is your everything

… which is just as well, as you’re her nothing.

Oddly enough, I was actually engaged in SPH play years before I even knew what it was – in the school changing room, for instance. I guess I’m just a natural.

Don’t worry, she generally just takes little light puffs, she doesn’t pull on it to drag it down quickly. Unless she’s had a hard day or something like that, obviously.

In a very real sense, marriage to her is a stress position, so it’s all good practice.

I find being on a leash quite reassuring. My SO got one of those extendable ones – you know, that have a kind of wheel that can pay out to allow the pet to run off some way – and I have to say, I felt almost agoraphobic with it on. Unfortunately, it broke one day when I was fetching it, and after a good hard discussion of why ‘it broke’ I was dragged out of the door on the good old chain.

Bunnies are actually savage little creatures. True fact (read Watership Down). Perhaps that’s what inspires these lovely ladies.

Hmm… looks like Jake was a bit surprised by that! He really shouldn’t have been – anyone could have guessed that Bluetooth connectivity was likely to come up. Now he’s going to get all embarrassed by having his ignorance shown up right there on stage.

But you won’t cry, I know

Angry tears are too dear.

She likes it when you say please and thank you, but you need to get used to saying them quickly, because once she starts using alternating hands, it gets pretty fast.

Men need to take responsibility for their own behaviour. His body, his fault.

They say when you’re in a hole it’s best to stop digging… although my experience has always been that if I’m digging a hole I’d better damn well keep digging as fast as I can, until she tells me to stop.

Don’t get your hopes up, she rarely keeps the boys she collects when she’s out.

And if she does finally snap and put you on the leash, for goodness’ sake don’t make her drag you along. It’s not fair to expect her to do all the work in the relationship.

She doesn’t realise what a career boost a photo feature in AFM can provide. Take a look at some of the shots from the magazine I’ve featured here – A-listers, almost all of them.*

* Fans of AFM – yes, there are some, you’re not the weirdest reader of this blog, you know, not by a long chalk – can look forward to a great start to 2025. No spoilers, though.

Take you over and under and twisted up like origami

Sounds like she’s got a good understanding of the basics already.

There’s no excuse for that kind of rudeness. Hugo’s got as much right to enjoy your wife, free from any snide sideways looks, as any of the other guys, right?

Like any organization, OWK needed administrative staff but the ladies early on hit on a brilliant scheme to keep the staff costs down. Incidentally, I understand their management style was largely ‘top down’ although could occasionally also be described as ‘bottom up’.

Just a bit of harmless roleplay… indulge her. In her nurse’s uniform, mmm….

She likes to keep her slaves fit. And in pain, too, of course.

Sounds like she’s got a lot of work to do, in this marriage. I’m sure she’s up to it, though.

Heavenly beings

If there is, I’m sure it’s a problem that won’t take her long to sort out.

You know, true connoisseurs can tell from just one sniff which mistress pissed in their wine, and what she had to eat over the last 24 hours.

Actually, he has a sneaky plan to take an emetic and vomit it out, so he’s smiling inside. It’s great, being a submissive, isn’t it? Imagine how awful it would be to have a different fetish, one for which you didn’t have to suffer.

Yes, her. But her web site seems to have last been updated in 2019, so alas…

She puts a lot of effort into it too – I hope you’ll be suitably grateful, once you’re able to speak again.

Callers can end up spending a lot of time on hold, listening to annoying music broken by an occasional recorded message assuring the caller that all their operatives are currently busy or can’t be bothered to take a call and that his call is utterly unimportant to them.

Some people say it’s cruel. Others say ‘Yeah, sure it is. And?’

She’s got it

And she’s quite prepared to use it, so stop arguing and bend over.

There’s obviously no inherent contradiction in describing something as both ‘a traditional costume’ and ‘a spanking dress’. Just ask the ladies or – when they’ve finished standing in the corner – the men of the Czech Republic.

It’s shocking the state some of these railway station toilets get into. Thank goodness there are public-spirited people like her prepared to step up and do something about it.

At least she mentioned it, first. It’s actually quite offensive, the way so many women consider castrated males’ bodies almost to be public property – just reaching out for a little pat without asking permission.

Ironically enough, those discussions tend to be anything but ‘instant’, often going on for hours.

See, that’s a Mars/Venus thing right there. The male naturally focuses on the physical cause of his pain but the woman looks beyond these trivial mechanical explanations for the underlying psychological reason. Like during a beating: it’s not the whip she’s cracking across your back that’s hurting you, it’s your own behaviour.

I have follow-up questions… Let’s hope she doesn’t consider them impertinent – oh, who am I kidding? Let’s hope she does.

Someone to look up to

What she doesn’t realise is that I always do my best… it’s just usually rubbish, that’s all. Fortunately, I’ve had a lot of practice at scurrying.

She can resist anything except temptation.

At the OWK there’s always a bucket available, in case one of the slaves feels sick. Usually it’s just the bucket the food comes in, actually.

Of course, I don’t necessarily know that this is actually what happened behind closed doors, and I’m just imagining a scene that happens to fit what I would like it to have been. So… just like the actual series, The Crown, then.

His name won’t go down in the record books along with hers, but his scream will be what a lot of viewers remember, when watching the footage of that historic day. Plus, he got to attend the medal ceremony, curled up and sobbing on the grass by the podium. It did delay his trip to hospital but how many times in your life are you going to be the target of a world-record ball-busting kick?

I guess he was asking for it. But not paying… so unfair.