cuckold – Contemplating the divine

Gracious, devilish, mythical ladies

Some women are very hard to satisfy. Others impossible. It’s about 50/50 between the two, in my experience.

Don’t worry, she’ll look after you and provide for all your needs.

You may kiss the floor a respectful distance away from the bride.

Don’t be too disappointed if his humiliation ideas are a bit basic – he’s new to this. And male, so sophistication isn’t really to be expected.

She is nothing if not consistent. Except when she decides on a whim to be capricious.

He’s right about one thing: it *will* be an experience.

While humble subbies washed her socks

It’s the eve of Christmas Eve and it’s all beginning to look a lot like Christmas. In my SO’s household, today’s wrapping day, so she’s busying herself with tape and sparkly ribbon, and soon I’ll be hog-tied under the tree, garlanded with holly and… well, just holly, really, lots of it, all ready to be mocked and abused by her and her guests on the big day. I just hope that if they play ‘pin the tail on the loser’ again, they do it before they’ve had quite so much to drink this year, as last time many of the pins ended up in completely the wrong place! It gave everyone a good laugh, though, and I suppose that’s the main thing. There’s a lot of laughter in the house on Christmas Day and occasionally some tears too… it’s a very special time.

How silly of her not to realise that the solution to her problems is right there in the room with her, even as she speaks. In the chest of drawers, there: third drawer down at the back. You could even plug it in for her, so it has plenty of battery.

He likes to give himself a bit of Christmas cheer by imagining that it’s a stable he’s shivering in and that tin bath in which he’ll be plunging a few days later is a manger. No gold, frankincense or myrrh but she did once put a goat in with him.

She’s generous with her gifts: it’s not just the quantity but she also has a knack for choosing something that is just what he least wanted.

Let’s hope she’;s not disappointed. She’s suffered a lot of disappointment in her marriage, poor thing.

That wooden doll on the table is actually a large nutcracker. One of my SO’s girlfriends got her one just like it, one year, and she spent most of the day playing with it obsessively. One of our more memorable Christmasses.

Try to look pleased, even though it’s what she gets you every Christmas or birthday. She’s not thoughtless or anything, mind you: she does think quite a lot about what present you might like. She just doesn’t care.

I’ll take this opportunity to wish all my male readers a miserable, frustrating and humiliating Christmas. I hope you all get what you deserve.

You have placed a lock around my heart

NB: still having some problems with the spam filter on comments. It has somehow become much stricter and while this blog generally celebrates extremes of strictness, this does seem to be overly restrictive (I can tell it’s not just that no one is speaking to me, because the small proportion of actual scummy spam that usually gets through has gone to zero). I have tried changing the settings and I might do more of that, but the most important thing if you are blocked is to request access, then try again about a day later, as your IP address should then be on the allow list.

There’s always a next month. Just try to remember that.

Actually, the boyfriend’s non-exclusive as Stumpy’s having much more success attracting sex partners than he ever had before he was mounted on a trolley – the sign encouraging punters to use him in any way they like probably helps.

Maybe she can do an in-kind exchange thing. He gives her a discount on the car and in return she takes his money and ignores him. If you have a valuable, marketable skill, you should use it wherever possible.

She’s bad with names. She forgot yours years ago.

She does occasionally feel mean, it’s true.

The lovely Maya Sin, who once made me memorise a French poem while tied hand and foot. She now appears to have retired so no link for you, perves!

Best sushi-eating scene in cinematic history is here.

Don’t make her ask you twice

It wasn’t really a request in the first place.

The world looks different, seen through tears. Often a lot clearer, oddly enough.

Of course, later, historians would debate whether ‘the lab leak hypothesis’ was actually a correct description of the cause, many (such as Sonia Lucysdaughter in her book *They Had it Coming Anyway*) preferring the ‘Some male moron probably fucked up, as usual’ hypothesis.

She’s struggling to keep control of herself.

If anyone’s thinking she’s only giving away someone else’s money, you haven’t really got the findomme thing. That’s Jerk-off’s wallet, so the money in it is hers, whatever you (or indeed Jerk-off) might think. Incidentally, Jerk-off’s name is going to change soon, as it doesn’t really suit his new lifestyle.

I read somewhere that modern AIs hallucinate things, so any AI femdom programme might punish you mercilessly for things you never even did! Yum…

And your parents will be gone long before Simon and Olly arrive, later.

Divine displeasure

Very different from my SO’s attitude – she likes to hear about how much it hurts.

Bit pointless to book a heavy session and use a safeword anyway. It’s like…. I dunno, going to an expensive restaurant and only eating stale bread with water. I mean, I’ve done that, obviously but…

She’ll definitely tell them off: she’s very cross about what they did. But she has a sweet, forgiving nature, so don’t be surprised if she goes back on her intention to ban all of them except Tony. I mean, that is a lot of cock to deprive herself of, and it’s not as if it was really such a big deal, right? And there’s the question of fairness to them to consider too…

You can have one of his trainers as well, if you fancy a threesome.

It’s ridiculous you can’t have men’s brains fixed to stop them being annoying… seriously annoying, I mean, obviously. We need to fund the NHS properly.

Lots of things to think about… and plenty of time to think, too.

Inattention seeking

Her book’s much more interesting than you, after all… although now I come to think of it, almost everything is, isn’t it? No, you can just nod quietly: permission to speak is still rescinded.

She offers a very specialised service. Well, I say ‘offers’ – she doesn’t actually give subs the opportunity to refuse.

You probably won’t have many things to talk about anyway, once he realises she doesn’t mind you sucking him off.

You might be surprised they were able when drunk to remember it all to tell the registry people, but of course they could just read it off the tattoo.

Don’t worry: Madame Sarka will realise immediately what really happened and will know it wasn’t his fault. She won’t *care*, obviously, but she *will* know and that should be some comfort at least as she’s beating the crap out of him and screaming abuse at him in Czech.

Unsafe spaces

If you want to experience the thrill of taking risks in public, try disobeying her.

It’s their civic duty, unpleasant though it might be.

Ah… the sadistic new lesbian girlfriend. Always a tricky transition in any sub-male’s life.

Mistresses Hannah and Sarah are unavailable too… odd, that.
The whole N*z* girl thing is actually something of a declining fetish. I understand in America, liberal subs are increasingly requesting dommes to wear red MAGA caps, while conservatives want schoolmarmy types who will force them to state their pronouns. Maybe there’s hope yet, to heal the rift.

Ooh, maybe you’ll get to have sex with her! Or at least, you’ll get to have someone having sex with you, quite near her.

I told my regular domme recently that I’d find it very exciting if she were to spend a romantic evening with another woman, culiminating in lesbian sex, while I was kept in chastity and ignored. Turns out she’d already been doing that for months, if not years! So that’s quite a lot of backdated session fees I owe her.

Paradox girl, mighty woman,you are the thing that terrifies them.

Don’t worry, she’ll adhere strictly to the conditions in the contract you just signed. You did read it, right?

It’s understandable: most operations on males don’t require anesthetic.

Next time she might try just not turning up. Testing your limits… you see?

No animals were or will be harmed in the making of this torture-snuff caption.

That is a good mnemonic: works for lots of things.

Fortunately they were able to use agency photos to illustrate the article as the camera-sissy’s hands were shaking too much with shy excitement to do justice to Mistress Kate’s flowing locks.

Bonny brutality

I don’t pee standing up, either. My SO insists that I do it lying in my bathtub, with my legs up as far over my head as they’ll go. It’s quite uncomfortable – and messy – but she says it’s funnier that way.

The trick is to have a weekly joint budget – and for the male to have sufficient incentive to make sure it isn’t exceeded, no matter what she spends.

You can get an app to track your pillory time each week, I understand, which can be useful for writing letters of thanks.

‘D-I-V-O-R-C-E – find out what you’re worth to her, on the open market.’

Oh good. I hope one of them’s a nice cup of hot chocolate.

It’s not mind-reading. Men can’t really hide it when they’re aroused. I don’t just mean erections – even we submissives who aren’t allowed them exhibit subtler signs, like whining and pleading.

Women of consequence

You often hear it said that women don’t really care about cock size and that’s certainly been my experience. Most women I’ve dated have made clear to me that the size of my cock is of no interest or practical significance whatever, as far as they are concerned.

In the modern world, men have to learn to be supportive if they want to remain useful.

Oh, you can stick with being Number 13. You’re already among the luckiest men alive, to be one of her paypigs, so I don’t think you need to worry about anything bad happening.

Men don’t really do irony. Screaming and begging for mercy, that’s what they do.

Tamara Kenworthy there… oh, Tamara Kenworthy.

Who is also the lovely Samantha Alexander, here being delightful and non-dominational in a video introduced by (formerly Strict Miss) Zoe Page. So regrettably vanilla, although so captivating in appearance and voice and the line “We’re not in Chesterfield any more” gets extra points for Britishness. Does anyone know if the other lady, Charlotte Elizabeth, is also a domme? She looks kinda dommey.