Pain points

These ladies like to emphasise them.

Probably best to clear two hours, there’s no point in rushing these discussions.
Oh well, if it’s complicated probably best not to inquire further. Anyway, you’re paying for this time. Let’s play!

For the avoidance of doubt, I am sure that in real life Goddess Lady Skotia plays safely and delightfully, so the widow’s fascinator (such a lovely word) is just part of the outfit. And she does look very fetching in it.

“I am her Highness’ gimp at Kew, pray tell me Sir, whose gimp are you?”
It’s Mike I feel sorry for. She might not be bothered where her shots end up but he has to run to fetch the bolts back. A fully cocked crossbow fires them at several hundred miles per hour, so they go a long way if nothing gets in the way to slow them down.

Miss Chambers from Cruella a long time ago… such a pretty nose.

That’s a bit unfair. I frequently get quite close to girls who are having real sex, sometimes under the very bed where it’s happening.
Winners focus on winning. Losers focus on winners.

It isn’t what we say or think that defines us, but what we do

You will, of course, have recognised the title from the divine Jane’s Sense and Sensibility and thus have girded your loins (or had someone else firmly gird them for you) for another chapter of this blog’s longest running theme: period femdom. Like period drama you see, only…

What? No, not that kind of ‘period’. Pervert.

Anyway, here come the hot chicks in empire-line dresses, bustles, cropped bodices and suchlike.

They needn’t worry. The spirit of Chrstian mercy burns fiercely in their Aunt’s breast and she would greatly prefer to see the lad thrashed – several times, ideally – and retained in her service.
In the last county fair, the whippiness and suppleness of the birches produced on her estate received high praise.
As Marx tells us, social relations will be revolutionised by technological and economic developments. Yes, industrialisation may regrettably make slavery obsolete, but it will bring in new possibilities too. Electric cattle prods, for instance: unknown in pre-industrial society but today it is hard to imagine married life without them.
I have made a careful study of the good Baron’s oeuvre and may yet publish a scholarly monograph on it. Sadly, some of the pages in my only copy of his greatest work have become stuck together, so publication will have to wait.
To Sally’s disappointment, he describes nothing of the lives of the women of this exotic tribe and how they manage, left to their own devices without men. She takes a keen interest in that kind of thing. Perhaps when or if he writes another letter, she’ll learn more.
Don’t imagine that in saying ‘I’m sure you received worse thrashings in school’, she is merely speculating. She takes a keen interest in boys’ education and is on the board of governors of three local charity schools, so she is very well acquainted with the topic.

It’s the song of a merrymaid, peerly proud

Who loved a lord and who laughed aloud
At the moan of the merryman, moping mum
Whose soul was sad and whose glance was glum
Who sipped no sup and who craved no crumb
As he sighed for the love of a la-dy.

I used to wonder how girls could spend so long washing their hair. Then I found out.
Air stewardesses often like to have a sub waiting for them on arrival. After a long flight, they really want someone else serving them drinks and food – and if there’ve been any rude, arrogant passengers on the flight it’s still more important to have access to someone on whom to let off a bit of steam.
There are also consequences for remaining silent when she’s asked something, as well as for lying. So it’s all covered, really.
I hope this jokey little caption doesn’t contribute to that hurtful ‘castrating lesbian’ stereotype. Actually, survey data show that lesbians are, if anything, slightly less enthusiastic about castrating males than are heterosexual women, although there’s only a few percentage points in it.
They seem well-equipped.
Ooh… I hate job interviews. Like, I went to one where the interviewer asked me how I’d react to being slapped across the face and she didn’t even let me finish my answer! I did get the job, as it happens, but frankly that turned out to be a mixed blessing.

Fans of the ‘strict governess’ style of femdom might be interested in skipping to exactly 49 minutes into this 1970s British movie (NB, Russian site if you worry about such things), to reach the section which is about Theresa Berkley, of whipping horse fame. The movie is mostly in that 1970s British sex comedy style (oo-err, Missus, gwarn show us yer knockers!) but this bit is, I think, done quite well as it features the slow scolding build-up and anticipation (a theme I tried to convey in one of my few serious pieces: Waiting). Weirdly enough, although most of the film is knockabout farce, towards the end it takes on the tone of a public information film and features the then living, famous and very serious dominatrix, Monique van Cleef, in a short bit starting at 1:15.45. The 1970s were odd. But then, so are we, aren’t we? Extra trivia: the narrator is Charles Gray, narrator of Rocky Horror (where was his neck?) as well as being the best Blofeld, and Mrs Berkley is Carmen Silvera, who later dominated René in Allo Allo.

Whips and whims

Don’t forget your morning prayers too.
If love is there, honouring and obeying should come naturally. And if they don’t, I’m sure she can find an alternative means to encourage them.
He has… but here’s only so much misbehaviour you can get up to, muzzled and on a leash.
Don’t worry: she won’t whip you any more than necessary.
My SO finds it very upsetting when our cat catches a mouse and plays with it so cruelly. As she says, there’s a 50% chance the poor little thing is female.
It’s a future-proofed profession, because although technology obviously could automate the basic function of shit-carrying, it could never provide the same satisfaction forcing a male to do that provides to the onlooker.

Just wrap me up in chains

I’m not thinking of escape.

Why would I want to go anywhere? Here’s good.
She’d discipline you herself, but she’s too tenderhearted.
Why complicate matters? Sometimes all you need is a whip, a helpless victim, a remote location and an iron-clad alibi.
There are charities that will take care of widowed men, but I’ve heard they can be pretty brutal. So, I think you’re better off with her. Try keeping your silly men’s libber nonsense to yourself; that should help.
Wow – in with a chance, here!
Don’t worry – it’s perfectly normal to find things a little uncomfortable when current and former girlfriends get together. Even if you weren’t dangling from a hook with your legs held wide apart by a spreader bar, it would be a stressful situation.

Cruelty is its own reward

…but you often still have to pay her for it.

I suppose there comes a point when, if she’s gradually cut away every piece of you that isn’t your genitals, there’s only the genitals left. But then isn’t that equivalent to castrating you? Interesting philosophical question, there, to help you while away the time as you dangle in mute agony.
She has a low boredom threshold, so best not to keep going on about it.
My pain tolerance level has increased slightly over the years but unfortunately so has my SO’s.

Sharp-eyed readers (or just those who spend a lot of time wanking on the Internet) will of course recognise the lovely Goddess Mina Thorne.

You’ll soon learn about what’s important to her and what isn’t.
When they talk later, I expect she’ll need to release a lot of that anger and he’ll need – will desperately need – to release other things.
Actually, in a sense he’s getting off lightly. He was sentenced to 35 years but he’ll actually only have done 34 years, 364 days and about 12 hours. Lucky bastard, I hope he appreciates it.

She builds you up just to put you down

What a clown.

How very inconsiderate.
Funny how often that happens. It’s as if the spinner’s drawn to that outcome.
I discovered very early on in my dating career that the secret to really satisfying a woman sexually is to make sure she never meets me.
She has a similar approach to the men in her life – she likes them hungry, but not actually starving to death, or at least not too quickly.
She likes to feel a big cock inside her, so why can’t you?
Remarkably, AFM won a Pulitzer back in 1957 but its editorial standards have slipped a little since.

Sordid scenes

Words can hurt… he’s upset now, because he didn’t say it in the hope of getting out of the whipping, but because he meant it and he loves her. Whips can hurt too, of course. Quite a lot.
See, if you can’t be bothered to remind her at the right time, why should she be bothered about it?
Just follow the sound of her voice… I live my life according to that principle even when I’m not blindfolded.
Many guys see nothing wrong in an appreciative stare at a sexy girl. And increasingly, many girls see nothing wrong in bundling those guys into burlap sacks and brutally torturing them in a windowless underground cell. So it’s all just about finding the right partner.
Whenever I read yet another article claiming that men aren’t doing so well in the modern IT-oriented office, I just think about all the guys reading this blog: still working the computer effectively with just one hand, and with trousers down around their ankles. Show me a woman who’d do that.
She learns a lot from the conversations with them. For instance, she has discovered that it is “a nice skateboard”. Sometimes the conversation even goes as far as “Uh, yeah. Really, really nice.”

There’s only one thing I wanna do

I wanna get back home to you. Yes, Servitor’s back!

Terrible pun? Yeah, I suppose it is: like I said, Servitor’s back. The material’s only going to get worse. It’s actually not Servitor’s back, in case you were wondering, but it looks like it belongs to someone almost as annoying.

So, normal service resumes. Oh… one small change. You’re probably all only too aware of the inflation that many countries have suffered over the last few years. Everything’s just going up, up, up. Well, I’m afraid Contemplating the Divine is no exception. I’ve tried to hold things as they are for as long as I can, but it’s time to reflect reality, so I regret to have to announce that from now on there will be six images in every post, not five.

I know, I know and I can only apologise. You’re just going to have to cope.

Most of the attractive guys have already been taken, I suppose.
Their champion in the high-heeled kickboxing would have won gold too, but she was unlucky enough to have a Russian male drawn as her target in the final, got a little over-excited and had to forfeit that match when the target died. Everyone sympathised but rules are rules. Her opponent, the Australian, deliberately kicked her own target to death when she saw what had happened, in a lovely display of sportswomanship, so they shared silver.
She’s not looking for an ally, more of a conquered subject.
He’s obviously having second thoughts, and they’re fine with that. My own SO always says that if ever I find the pain too much, I am welcome to regret doing whatever led to the whipping. And if it really gets unbearable, she always says I should tell her.

Mistress Sidonia and Lady Sophia Black, in the scene above, both quite wonderful. That’s quite in the sense of ‘very’ not in the sense of ‘just a little’. Why no link to Lady Sophia Black’s website, Twitter feed, Instagram or Only Fans profile you may ask? Because she has retired and the world is a sadder and less beautiful, if also less painful and humiliating, place as a result.

Usually they bring one over and grind it at your table, I understand.
His packets of condoms say ‘large’* so he’s always assumed…. well, anyway, Annie** set him straight as she has so many men.

* Although the stereotype is that condoms only come in sizes ‘large’, extra large’, ‘jumbo’ and so on (the point of the feeble joke in the caption if you didn’t get it – you’re welcome) there are actually condom manufacturers who specialise in the, erm… less over-developed male. Brands such as ‘Teenie peenies’, ‘It’s what you do with it that matters’, ‘Just right’ and of course ‘Fun-size’ are all condoms made to fit snugly on even the smallest… well, OK, maybe the second-smallest male out there. They’re quite expensive but the economics of the business are absolutely terrible: most of their clients will buy one or at most two packets in a lifetime, so they need to cover a lot of overhead. Fortunately, the cost of the rubber is very low – less than a fifth as much is used in the ones I buy as in the average-sized condom, they claim, which is environmentally very sound.

** Yeah, Annie. Instructions from Herself.

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