Where men don’t matter

One of many, many places, to be honest.

I expect she’ll hear quite a few during it, actually.
There’s probably a perfectly good and innocent explanation for his being out without permission, and he’ll have a few panicked hours trying to think of it.
A little morning ritual can be a good way for a couple to show their feelings for each other haven’t changed. My SO always slaps me, for instance.
Modern technology’s all very well, but there”ll always be a place for good old-fashioned – even medieval – traditional ways, too.
‘Harmless’ is surely something for most men to aspire to.
He actually does have a secret fetish, but he’s never told her and she wouldn’t care anyway, and it’s not as if his cock can get hard any more, so I guess the world will never find out what it is – or was.

Entitled women

I’m told it’s quite common for a woman to be able to tell, instantly, if a submissive looks her in the eye. I wouldn’t know: I’ve never had the courage to look a woman in the eye.
The best way to learn is to go to their web site and buy her a few pairs.
It’s not as if she wants to look like you, subbie. Why would she? Why would anyone?
Don’t worry: they’ll all get to have at least one go.
She’d previously been told to turn it off and on again, but no male has ever been turned off in the presence of Ms Eleise de Lacy, so that was a non-starter.
To be honest, after a long day’s filming he’s going to have a hard time when she gets home whether he’s been annoying or not.

Controlled freaks

Just think how nice it’ll be when finally Petra does say yes. Or try not to think about that. Whatever.
I took a personality quiz once and failed.
As my SO likes to say, the pain is never ‘too much’, it’s always exactly the right amount.
It’s powerful stuff, but it works together with hormones coded by the Y-chromosome, apparently, so it doesn’t work on half the population. Still, that’s no reason not to put it into widespread production to get the benefits for the other half.
And just follow the same approach for the rest of your life too, obviously.
I’m not in favour of this happening to all food-delivery guys, mind. Just the 75% who ride their bikes on the pavement and through red lights.

When she asks for somethin’, boy, she means it

She’s a maneater (warning: disappointingly SFW)

Wow – pretty lucky I forewarned you by showing you her message, huh? I expect when she got up and walked off, you were just going to follow those shiny boots as they – hey! Where are you going? Didn’t you realise what she intends to… to… ? Oh well.
She takes shopping seriously, although it does irritate her when people focus pedantically on trivial details like the prices of things they’re buying for her.
He’s going to be in even more trouble when she checks back through his browser history and realises what it was he was actually trying to touch on what he assumed to be a touch-sensitive screen. Boys shouldn’t be allowed near computers unless they’re house-trained.
She herself has a medical condition, which makes her extremely intolerant to… well, just extremely intolerant, to be honest.
He meant to say $1.2 billion of course, but he was distracted by the hot-oil enema he was retaining, as he later had to explain to the auditors. On the plus side, when called to provide a sworn witness statement in his trial for negligence, Nanny Edith did say what a sweet little boy he was, although she admitted under cross-examination that he was sometimes careless with his sums and needed his bottom smacked a lot.
Learning Hungarian isn’t easy, but then Ms Palvin wouldn’t be such a goddess were she easy to please, would she?

In place of a dark lord, you will have a queen! Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn!

Treacherous as the sea! Stronger than the foundations of the earth! All shall love her and despair!

More fairy-things and fantasy follies.

Gaming has historically been a male-dominated space, but as computer games become more like the real world, female players are naturally going to take charge.
Don’t worry: she’s not one of those bleeding-heart liberal types. But she does believe that young offenders should be given a second chance, after a suitable short – or sometimes quite long – sharp shock and that one should never give up on trying to reform a young lad, no matter how much effort it takes.
If it doesn’t work out, she can always revert to a previous save and – oh, she’s playing on Irongirl mode? OK, I guess it’s the eternal agony, then.

I must report that I have fallen in love with this particular lady, who appears in an annoyingly low proportion of the gaming-related skits featured here. Here she is being very lovely, for instance. And here. No femdom, unless you count effortless goddess-like perfection as femdom.

They mostly got used to their new lives and some even got to like it. The main speaker was a bit unlucky, though, as he was stolen from a washing line by a group of teenage boys and spent the rest of his days being used as a masturbation aid… but we can’t always choose our paths in life, can we?
Don’t worry, she’ll find it. I’m sure she doesn’t want you to stay tiny and helpless forever, after all!
The story of Beauty and the Beast is quite mixed-up too, for some reason having the Beast magically transform back into a prince at the end, instead of being domesticated by Belle through her rigorous training regime.

Demanding damsels

Decisively disparaging defeated duds; dispensing discipline.

Sometimes women can be moved by a really tearful reaction to their decisions. My SO loves it when I cry.
Curiously, clients who request a ‘traditional governess’s outfit’ are greeted by a fishnet-wearing domme and also flogged for their impertinence in trying to control what she wears.
Don’t worry: each of the girls has a safeword which they can use to stop the beating at any time.
Looks like a lady who knows what to do with a long wooden pole.
She has a refined artistic sensibility that enables her to see beauty in even the most brutal and painful things.
His mother warned him about girls like her. But she’s not here, is she?

New occasional tag! Actually, they’re ‘categories’ but it makes no difference. Sweet Carolina! Similar vibes to Kitten.

Hard-hitting criticism

It’s the best sort.

But not really sorry sorry, if you know what I mean, not yet anyway.
It’s actually an incredibly common accident to happen, especially to guys strapped to a target board with their legs wide apart.
Ah, it wouldn’t be forced if they wanted to do it, would it?
She has urges too when confronted by a sub with his legs wide apart. Occasionally she resists them, but usually she doesn’t.
Remember the golden rule: if you don’t think a lady is respecting your autonomy and dignity as an adult, stamp your feet and bawl your head off in a tantrum. It never fails to get a reaction.

This lovely lady is Amy Hunter, whose wooden spoon Servitor has been privileged to have felt on several occasions (and I can confidently say I failed to take it like a man’ on any one of them).

Don’t worry if you don’t get everything right. As an expert on sexism and gender stereotyping, she is well aware that men are all moronic, bone idle, sex-mad idiots.

The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing

With that quote from Blaise Pascal (who she?), we introduce another post devoted to that sweetest of feminine characteristics: being impossibly, delightfully unreasonable in relations with the lesser sex.

Don’t interrupt her

Just don’t. And the easiest way to avoid doing so by accident is just not to speak at all in her presence, unless in response to a direct question.

Women featured on this blog do tend to get quite insistent when they are about to brush their hair, like this. No idea why.
Then he wants SPA: small penis admiration.
Treasure can be quite forgetful – just like that time she ‘forgot’ you were only supposed to be getting twenty lashes, and carried on for the best part of an hour. But she’s a sweet girl, really.
Oddly, the idea for his most celebrated breakthrough in hydrodynamics was when he was handwashing some period-stained panties and observed how the water swirled around the gusset while rinsing after scrubbing with the nailbrush. The resulting paper got over two thousand citations, although more importantly, Mistress was less pleased with the cleanliness – or otherwise – of her panties.
She can add the cost to the amount he owes, plus her usual commission of course.
Surely before a feast, one should fast so as to build up an appetite? Easy to see that this ‘paradise island’ needs a man around, to explain how best to do things!

The elegant and fabulous Mistress Eleise, looking fabulously elegant. Fans of this elegantly fabulous look just might want to take a furtive look here, although of course you certainly did not hear that from me.