Whatever she likes, whenever she says


Honestly, imagining bothering her about a little thing like that.



Oh well…wouldn’t want to disappoint Suzie, would we? 


Obviously, you are allowed to have opinions, even as her husband, as long as they’re the right ones.

…unless she’d rather I made her a nice cup of tea?  No?  Sure?  OK, cattle prod it is, then.

Like most men in a female-led relationship, I learnt about pre-menstrual tension quite early on.  Also post-menstrual tetchiness and during-menstrual extreme violence.

Graceless, Feckless, Aimless and Pointless

… that’s me.  But also characters in a novel by the divine Stella Gibbons which contains little if any femdom, I’ll admit, although Kate Beckinsale takes a rather firm hand with people in an entirely non-kinky way in the movie.

Now: something nasty from the woodshed.

She’s actually strictly vanilla. Very strictly.

I feel you ought to say something about this.

Oh, I hate mandatory penile minimum rules, don’t you?  It started out just with the nightclubs, and I can understand that, but I took my suit to the dry cleaners the other day, they insisted on a measurement and they wouldn’t take my suit unless I scrubbed and ironed for four hours, just for being four inches below the required minimum length!  It doesn’t seem fair.

Don’t make Mommy use her cattleprod, now!

There are no ‘problems’, only solutions.

You make my heart sing

You make everything… groovy baby.

Actually, most such limits turn out to be soft and squidgy, when tested vigorously.

Why do all my dates end up like this?  Maybe it’s the poetry…

Actually, I think the whole idea of young women putting their torture skills on display like this is a bit offensive.  But no one cares what I think. Even me, oddly.

I think the experience might bring you closer.  So will that hasp, when she attaches it to your collar.

There’s an amusing additional caption down here. Hello?  Down here…amusing caption?  Oh, I don’t know why I bother…

Try to see it Her way

…only time will tell if She is right or you are wrong.

Not do a good job at ‘good vigorous vanilla sex’?  Little chance of that, I can assure you!  Prepare for the best eleven seconds of your life, baby!

She later sold the house… said it contained too many memories.

If this blog is still going in three years, I guess this isn’t really going to work.

Looks like everyone’s having a slow, lazy afternoon.

She actually found it quite traumatic to watch, as she did the three she watched later on in the holiday.  But she bought the souvenir DVD anyway.

Speaking of holiday – I’m going off on one, fnarr fnarr.  So, usual CtD summer: with slightly faded but unused old captions published on a daily basis with minimal fuss.  Watch this space… but don’t forget to refresh your screen, or it’ll be a long dull summer for you.


When I first started dating my SO, I’d often finish before She had a chance to come, but now things are more under control She typically has oh… two, three…maybe even four hundred orgasms before that happens.

It’s always embarassing when men have to go to what’s basically a girls’ night out, isn’t it? You kind of stand around awkwardly, watching the wives roaring with laughter while you make polite converation about ironing tips and suchlike.  Women are just better at social events… it’s because they’ve got more empathy.


Life will be a lot simpler.  You can do as she says or starve.

Big decision.  Don’t pressure her, OK?

I’m down on my hands and knees.  Point me to the broken glass.

Hard-core scorn

Anyway, she can’t chat long.  She’s just off to the pet shop.  Wants to buy a couple of dogs, apparently.

It’ll be good when you’re married and you can just just be yourself.
I’m gender non-binary.  Well.. gender fractional, anyway.  About 1/7, my SO reckons.


It’s good to know a domme with a really creative imagination.

Managed care

Well, I hope she finds something to amuse herself with while you’re busy with all that.

You get to wear a nightie just like hers, too.
And she has a lot more than ten commandments.

I find I do some of my best thinking over a trestle.  I think about stuff a lot when I’m there.

Wow.  I think that’s the niceest compliment any girl has ever paid me.

That’s what she said

There’s a lot of give and take in their relationship, as you can see.

That one’s called ‘the tickler’.  Come on – arms up to the shackles – this is going to be fun!

libbers just need to spend more time reflecting quietly on how lucky
they are to be living in a female-led society, if you ask me. In the
corner, with a well-smacked bottom, preferably.
Just lick something at random – quickly!
With thanks to Alex Bragin for the translation.

There’s a hand gesture for ‘go away’ as well. Pray she never uses it.

Honourable ladies

…but of course they all are, are they not?

Ah well.  Back to real life.
I once asked a domme for a session where I’d be treated with total contempt and indifference.  I paid her the session fee in advance and then I never heard back from her – then when I tried to get in touch I found my emails and my phone number were blocked.  Best session ever.
Don’t worry about the spanking marks.  She won’t be embarassed.


I’ve heard in some restaurants, the staff spit in your food if you’re rude. I was in a cafe the other day where the waitress was really beautiful, so I was tempted to insult her just on the offchance, you know, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.  Just too sub, I guess.
Many men come too early.  January, February – that kind of thing  But with the right amount of control (preferably made of steel) you should find you can hold back almost indefinitely.


It’s all so calculating (she’s got a calculator)

You say you’ll never know him, he’s an unnatural man

It’s not the size anyway, it’s what you do with it.  And how many times.

He can say no, of course. As many times as he likes, actually.
She gets through boyfriends quite quickly, I’ve heard.  Must be a bit fickle, I suppose.  Shame, ‘cos she’s cute.

Looks good on her, don’t you think?  Better than on the donors, I expect.

Actually, there are lots of things they don’t approve of men doing. Good job you’ve got her to protect you.
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