still no bandicoots – Contemplating the divine

Little man, you’re crying

Thank goodness (and her) for that.

I’ve always thought it odd that I am both her object and her subject.

When she talks of the ‘place’ that’ll do it, just think of a gleaming, modern medical facility, OK? Not a dirty garage filled with rusty tools. It’ll be easier that way.

Thank goodness for the invention of electricity – it’s a great way to save labour, or induce it depending on who’s holding the zapper.

One day your luck might run out.

Shame game

Fine, but I’m not putting his condom on for him this time. I have my pride.

Don’t worry – the guys might think you look silly at first, but I’m sure they’ll be impressed when you go into your dance routine.

For a while my orgasm day was 29 February, but ‘we’ decided to stop all that, as it was getting a bit repetitive and predictable.

Women and knots, eh? Bless ’em.

Which is a bit unfair if you have a fetish for being humiliatingly searched by ladies in positions of authority. Oh well, at least she’s not wearing her uniform, so there’s a chance.

A fairy-tale romance

… with me as the frog.

She’s trying to de-clutter.

Should last her until the spring, her favourite time of the year, when the first fresh green nettles start to arrive.

It’s probably that damn dog. The same one that keeps stealing her used underwear.

It’s a service industry.

I guess she would. Vigorously, immediately and without mercy.

Makes your feet and fingers glow

No, not that. (Warning: SFW)

This.

I don’t bother too much about fashion myself. Life’s easier when all you wear is a steel collar. I’m never out of style because I’m never allowed out.

Practice makes perfect. Next!

Many brides encounter disappointment on their wedding nights. She just needs to make the best of it and move on, I reckon.

Married couples should try to share one another’s interests. It’s about making an effort: an act of the will. Sure, he’s not so interested in cock, but maybe he could just bend from time to time, hmm? Is it so hard?

I went to see Justice League. I’ve got to say, I have mixed feelings about it. Maybe… oh I don’t know… 20% of the movie is really great but the other 80% was just meh for me. There was some really shoddy camerawork too – like on several occasions, you could clearly see actors in shot, speaking lines and stuff like that, and blocking the view of Gal? That’s just unprofessional.

Beneath contempt

… but I’m hoping to elevate myself to that level, through hard work and diligent attention to Her wishes.

Of course, bondage play is out of the question. But also unnecessary.

Yes. A sympathy fuck would be just awful. Don’t even think about it.

Don’t get frightened if your top brings out a long and detailed consent form, by the way. It’s the two-sentence versions that should worry you.

You can never have enough hats, gloves, slaves and shoes.

Travel Scrabble?

Castigation

My secretary at work handles all my appointments too. This evening, for example, I have an appointment to wash her boyfriend’s car.

Well, she won’t find anything down there, believe me! Ridiculous to have to go through these sorts of inspections, even now.

You can use the basin in the ladies’ bathroom, if it bothers you to be seen doing the handwashing in the mens’.

The divine Goddess Heather, of course, whom we might have contemplated here once or twice before.

You’d be surprised how more effective that can be than even the most enthusiastic amateur.

PS -just discovered this (rather excellent) post, and indeed quite a few more femdom tales by ‘Freddie’. If you like my stuff, I think you’ll like those. I do. Many of the rest of his stories feature dominant males, which for me… well, I just find it to hard to suspend disbelief when authors stray quite so far from real life as that, but I suppose it’ll rock some people’s boats.

Every lady shall be exalted

… and every husband and man shall be laid low.

You have to ask if you want the built-in sliding cucky drawer, though. It costs extra.

Divorce can be painful.

My apologies to all of those submissive men out there who are highly skilled at housework, and don’t just use it as an excuse to flounce around humiliatingly in a little maid’s dress in session. Sorry – I mean, both those submissive men…

Also quite a lot bigger. They can still do SPH play, though. She’s kept his original one in a jar.

Biting’s not the worst of it. Bloody Rufus. No friend of mine.

Fear and loving

Oh, no. Not Lucy.

They do furnish a room.

It’s a good idea to have it written there on the fridge, to remind you both that it’s overdue. I’m sure she’ll get round to it, though – no need to nag.

Boring old politics. Still, you’d better go along to look pretty on her arm.

You could kiss and make up.

More unpleasant things

…of the usual sort.

Don’t worry, she always reaches orgasm eventually. She won’t give up.

(The lovely, Divine, Mistress Heather.)

If you pay extra, she’ll do tease and denial too. That’s where she asks you if you’d like to come, before telling you to fuck off.

Actually, she does get occasional complaints. But they’re always retracted, with a heartfelt apology, before the end of the session.

Technology… oh dear. As if I wasn’t already obsolete enough.

In space, no one else can hear you scream.

Commanding respect

Or the one before that.

I like to leave these details to my wife too. She’s better at that sort of thing.

Return of an old friend.

On the plus side, they do get lots of great shots of dommes looking really pissed-off. On the minus, a lot of expensive cameras have been smashed. Oh – and the photographer’s been hospitalised once or twice too.

Kind of a once-in-a-lifetime experience, huh?