Ladies in red

Men’s libbers are actually firmly opposed to being spanked.  Most men are, actually.  But they always end up thankful for it.

I once paid a prostitute to have sex with me – booked with a credit card.  But when I opened the door to her, she looked me up and down, dug around in her purse, handed me the same amount in cash and walked off.  Which could actually be quite handy some time, if I’m ever somewhere with no ATMs.
Never try puppy play alongside an actual dog.  They’re better at it. Much the same goes for sex and real men.  Don’t even try – you’ll just look foolish.  And you wouldn’t want that.


Except that she’s started by using social media to advertise, so her first clients are precisely likely to be your friends.  And your close family members.

She’s sneaked a tub of lube into the bottom of your tuck box.  You know: to make the first few days a bit easier.  She’s kind like that.

Back to his place

That seems very cruel.  My own SO is much kinder – she’s got me on a diet consisting almost entirely of  fatty bacon sandwiches and chocolate cake!  Yum.  She wants me to take up smoking too.  She’s thoughtful like that.

There’s actually a Lifetime Achievement category at the annual snuff movie awards, but strangely no-one’s ever claimed it.

Well… OK. As long as she listens to his
concerns this time.  Last time, she decided she needed to pee right in
the middle of the conversation and I think he never got to say
everything he intended.
There you are, you see?  Now why did she let him get like that? Too soft on him, that’s what she is.

This blog doesn’t often feature dominant males, so say hi to Master Rod.  You won’t be seeing him often, but maybe he’ll be brought out to play from time to time.

Another quick one

Oh, hi – is that Mr Harris? 
Good morning, it’s Lisa here from Megabank Card Services.

I’m very well, thank you. 
Now the reason I’m calling, is our fraud detection system flagged some
of your credit card transactions as unusual, so I just wanted to check that
those were really you.   It’s probably
fine, but we just need to check.

OK, so can I just run through some recent items?
Right,  now on
Thursday you purchased two books from Amazon? 
“Dealing with sexual failure” was one I think, and “Spanked in front of
the girls”?  OK, fine.

Then the next day, I’ve got a purchase of a web subscription,
3 months non-recurring, to “Diaper boys and strict nannies”? And then a
purchase of premium access to the same site, two hours later?


Fine.  And then the next evening there’s a charge for “Samantha
Strict’s chatline”?  No?  Oh – that wasn’t you?  Are you sure?  OK, well we’d better log that.  Only there’s several, you see.  There was “Small penis humiliation”, for £45,
then two hours later I’ve got “Wank on my command”.  So I’d better alert our fraud department, and
start a –

 – what’s that?  Oh they
were you?  That’s fine then, because…oh
yes, don’t worry.  It’s strange how quickly we can forget these things, isn’t it?  It’s just as well, because
there was another this morning:  “Piss
boy humiliation”.  Oh – and one’s just
popped up on screen from this afternoon: “Beg to cum”.  That’s probably why your number was engaged when we
called 10 minutes ago – you’d have been just finishing that one off, I expect.
OK, well if that’s all fine, I can clear the suspected fraud
flag.  They can update your profile, you
see, so that similar purchases won’t set off the warnings.  That way I won’t need to keep bothering you
by phoning up – I expect you’ve got better things to do!
And your profile will be updated throughout the bank’s
systems.  That way we can provide you with
better, more personalised financial products and offers, you see.  Whenever you call, or if you drop into the
bank, whoever you’re talking to will have all your details in front of them on
the screen, so they’ll know exactly who they’re dealing with.
Now, is there anything else I can do for you today?

No, not at all.  My
pleasure.  Bye now!

Verified by MonsterInsights