chains – Contemplating the divine

Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins

Ah, the Bible is such a great source of vaguely pervy-sounding quotes. As are the collected works of Leopold Sacher-Masoch, for that matter. I just take inspiration from where I can get it.

There’ll be other opportunities. I’m sure all that worrying won’t go to waste.

I’m proud to say that I’ve never paid for sex in my life. Quite the oppposite, if anything.

She could ask you to finish the story for her, but she doesn’t want to embarass you unduly on the first day of your married life together.

Any male visitors suggesting their holy book is a modern fake will be scourged severely. But then, all male visitors get scourged severely anyway, so…

Her rule is that you can specify any limits you like in the email but if it’s NOT in the email, it’s fair game. And she’s a lot more creative than most of her clients, so she manages to have plenty of fun whatever the constraints.

He should be reassured: Anya’s something of an expert on testicular damage.

Take me, cut me to the bone

Lace and satin pressed against me. Musical link is, for once, reasonably related.

…and her beloved won’t be able to avoid any difficult conversations she may need to have with him too.

Of course, it’s important to remember these AIs aren’t infallible. It’s noticed what makes her happy – inflicting severe pain on her husband – and is responding accordingly.

Consensual, so important. Especially when things are neither safe nor even close to being sane, as here. Servitor top tip: do not try this at home! Find a nice open space outside, just in case.

Spookily inaccurate

A Halloween special.

Unpleasant, cruel trick or delightful, yummy treat? But…but… aren’t they the same thing?

My SO really likes to do Halloween properly. She creates a whole ‘spooky garden’ on the way up to the house, with ghostly lights and freakish moans from a lost soul shackled in a cage dangling by the front porch. It gets ever so cold, but it’s a fun way of doing something with the local community. And anyway, it’s only for one night, unless she, y’know, forgets, dear absent-minded thing that she is.

Apparently, he’s been very naughty and she’s going to have to be strict with him. Very strict.

An eternity of torture in Hell may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but compared to most dommes’ hourly rates, it’s remarkably affordable.

They say the place is haunted by the ghost of a housemaid, chained and on her knees, endlessly scrubbing, scrubbing, scrubbing away the stains on the floorboards that can never be fully erased… but that’s just Trevor, he’s one of the regulars.

Actually, she hates Halloween – it’s Amateur Night.

Hmm. I reckon this could be a turning point in their relationship.

You made the rules and you could not see

…y ou made a life out of hurting me.

Males always have disgusting things in mind. It’s not their fault (but that’s no reason to let them off a beating for it) – they *are* disgusting.

Contrary to the stereotype about women’s sexual preferences, findommes tend to want to skip the foreplay of little teasing gifts and just get straight into deep penetration of their partners’ bank accounts.

She’s going to be hanging around in lingerie a lot from now on. It’s just her making sure, to show how she feels about you.

I was about to ask whether there’s anything worse than having a lovely pair of shoes when your chain’s *just* too short for your lips to reach them… but there are worse things, obviously. Many, many worse things – as my SO has been kind enough to teach me, over the years.

This could explain some of the apparently random and heartless decisions global companies have taken in recent years, actually. Maybe I’ll write something for the Harvard Business Review.

Must be nice for Kate and her boy, being ‘out’. I’ve had to read up about epilepsy, because that’s our cover story if anyone ever sees me writhing around on the floor gasping incoherently after saying the wrong thing to my SO (or looking like I might be about to). Still, I suppose that’s a small price to pay for living the fantasy in reality.

Spoken for

She’s already apologised to her sister on your behalf, but that doesn’t mean you won’t be going round to her place to apologise directly, too – and offer to make amends, of course.

Must be terrifying being tiny. Good thing there are big strong girls like her around to look after you.

Understandable that he wants to make sure, given that the two of them will be working so closely together every day, but sometimes a candidate arrives at an interview and just makes such a strong impression from the start that you know she’s going to get the job.

That’s the divine Heather, being contemplated in the scene above.

Many people don’t realise that in English, like very gendered languages such as Japanese, there are words that women can use that men cannot. But there are.

Sometimes an unexpected, spur-of-the-moment session can be best. One time, for instance, I was walking home late at night and clumsily bumped into one of a group of girls. Given no time to apologise properly, I was beaten up, kicked repeatedly in the balls and face, robbed, spat on and left penniless lying in a side-alley. When you think of all the emails and careful arrangements you’d need to do that with a pro-domme….

Pitch black

A new theme. No resemblance to any actual products made by real companies with highly litigious legal departments is intended.

A long time in politics

A week is a long time in politics, they say, which makes it a lot like predicament bondage.

I should apologise for any medical problems induced by the high prevalance of heart-stopping beauty in this post. But I won’t, because anyone collapsing in front of his screen, trousers around his ankles, probably deserved it, nasty little pervert.

These days with such a fragmented media landscape it’s very hard to determine what’s true and what isn’t. Quick pro-tip: if it’s on this blog, it probably isn’t. So don’t worry about that female supremacist conspiracy, OK? Just a femdomination sex fantasy thing, nothing to see.

There were several defining moments of her campaign, many of which went viral and some of which became among the highest-ever viewed clips on femdom porn sites, oddly enough. Still, all publicity is good publicity, right? It’s like spanking, in that respect.

Yada yada slavery, yada yada shock collars. That’s the tired old politics… time to move on, surely? And if those men’s rights activists can’t understand that for themselves maybe they just need a little help to see the bigger picture? Shouldn’t the government step in – or stride, in high-heeled boots – to provide that? Hey – I’m just asking questions here.

The First Gentleman should be a role model for all boys, so it’s important to check his behaviour whenever he falls short of that high standard – and her higher ones. So, really, it’s her duty. The interns… OK, that’s just a stress relief thing.

She won’t say branding’s painless because it isn’t. See how refreshing it is when political leaders don’t, like, lie all the time?

And he received them with a strange delight

Just like his wife but how she was before the tears

It took me a long time looking at this not to see her as having one incredibly long right leg and a weirdly mis-shapen left. But maybe that’s just me.

My SO always says if I behave like a child, she’ll treat me as a child. Which to be honest is a lot easier than how I’m treated when she decides I’ve behaved like a lawbreaking dissident in a totalitarian state.

He’s actually a sweet guy… he just gets a bit tense at times, that’s all, especially if he’s not getting enough sex. You’ll adapt.

Lady Darla, there, one of many reasons to visit Warsaw – and stay there indefinitely.

He’s quite the expert on school canings, Headmaster Bob, so if they’re a bit slapdash at first, I hope he’ll advise them on technique.

Even if they knew, few if any would care.

Helplessly devoted

She might at some point make you consent to what’s going on, just to ease her conscience.

If after you’ve discussed them there are *still* things the two of you disagree on, well, you can always just discuss them again, can’t you?

Could be the start of something beautiful. A turning point, so to speak.

I once cancelled a session with a domme at short notice but she ignored me and went ahead anyway. Quite right too.

Sometimes guys think going 24/7 means they can’t ask for things any more, and that’s just such a misunderstanding. I’m always asking my SO for stuff – food or water, mostly – and usually she doesn’t mind at all.

Sometimes, the ferals watch her being oiled up by one of her domesticated males and just walk into the cages of their own accord.

Work harder, not smarter

That was my SO’s advice to me, soon after we married. As with all her advice, following it has made my life a lot easier.

And if at first she doesn’t succeed, no harm in trying again.

Make sure you empty the bath with buckets and carry the soapy water back down to a proper drain when you’re done, OK? It’s more environmentally friendly. Or just remind her to make sure you do it – that’s probably going to be more effective, actually.

Awkward.

Thank goodness someone’s there to keep up standards.

Don’t worry – she’ll be keeping an eye on the situation, via the livestream. She’ll step in if she decides it’s all too much.