Those uncomfortable conversations

Try not to pity her boyfriend too much, abject slave to his desires though he is: he doesn’t know any better, poor soul.
How reassuring.
Don’t worry: she’s not really going to change her name to Mrs Pencildick. As a matter of fact, her husband’s the one who’s going to be legally changing his surname. To hers, obviously, although she is considering making him change his first name officially to Pencildick, or some such, at the same time.
It’s the same algorithm that sends you all those dick enlargement emails. Oh… you thought they were just spam? No, they’re very carefully targetted. Most other guys don’t get them.
When setting up a session with a new domme I usually ask her to treat me with utter contempt and disdain and I have to say, my experience has been that they’re all startlingly good at it. Sometimes I don’t even ask and they still get it right… I guess experienced dommes develop a kind of sixth sense for what their clients are looking for.
He obviously survived to a ripe old age… imagine him keeping the book all those decades, turning the pages occasionally to reminisce over his days under Miss Rathbone’s loving tyranny, only for the book to be sold to a second-hand shop after his death. Still: looks like it’s found an appreciative home.

…and just a little bit of found femdom to finish (do hurry up and finish, won’t you? Your wife will be back soon and you don’t want her to find you like this). More divine Joy. who has done this many, many times before and she totally, totally knows

Perfectly unreasonable

Lots of men experience sudden, irrational fears the night before their wedding. Or rational fears, sometimes, too.
Feelings of inferiority are her therapeutic speciality.
Oh, poor thing. Maybe she should drive off to find a chemists’ shop to buy some antihistamine – it’s best to deal with these things early, before the bites become inflamed.
I’ve tried paying for the ‘realistic girlfriend experience’ a few times, but it’s really a waste of money. They often don’t turn up and even if they do, we usually go to a bar or something where they get off with someone else and leave without me.
‘Cos she’s her laaaydeee… and you’re their male.
Erm… that spanking went without a hitch…no. This painting’s a bit kitsch… Oh dear.

Well, you don’t sound very grateful

Recent quote from a lovely domme, disappointed by my bad manners. Needless to say, she helped me to express my gratitude more profusely.

Pictures are neither more nor less related than usual.

I expect she has quite firm views – vigorously expressed – on gratitude, too.
Of course she’s not actually going to throw the gift set away – I mean, she has it now, so she might as well keep it. But its the principle of the thing. Ironically enough, that particular cosmetics firm practises cruelty-free testing. And she knows that. But she holds to her principles very strongly.
What a shame she doesn’t let you have enough money to afford her services. Oh well, there’s always sitting alone in the dark and howling inwardly, right?
There’s a guy who hangs around the coffee shop just waiting to see that domme approaching the door, so he can leap ahead of her in the queue and ‘pay her coffee on’. Sadly, she doesn’t know that because she’s never had to pay for a coffee there and thinks its free… so she just occasionally notices with irritation the guy who always barges ahead of her in the queue. But life was never meant to be fair.
As a last service, try to notice which way your beloved wife bet and then breathe faster or slower, depending, to help her win. That would be a loving gesture and it’s not as if you’ll have many more opportunities to show how much you care for her.
I wonder what it does mean? Madame Šárka seems to know… I expect she’ll be able to help him understand his mistake – and the seriousness thereof.

As a bit of found (and probably unintended) femdom, this is rather lovely, by the way. I wonder if it works with anything other than golf balls?

Enigmatic

Yes, just imagine how awful that would be. But don’t imagine too hard, or the spikes might start digging in painfully. Oh – too late? Sorry.
It’s amazing how modern technology can take the drudgery out of life but to a sufficiently determined woman, there’s still plenty of drudgery to be found.
I expect it’ll turn up eventually… and while it’s missing, you might even find out you could have done without it all along. It’s often that way.
Oh dear. And her feet too! Sigh. Scurry.
Don’t be so selfish – or possessive. In fact, it’s probably a good idea to get out of that last habit, now you don’t have possessions.
Mmm….

There’s no pleasing some people

I’m glad to say.

The rating scale goes up as high as ‘adequate’ but unlike many such platform rating systems, most clients don’t hand out the highest rating as a matter of routine.
Since he’d gone to the trouble of bringing it, she did give him a quick twenty with the stupid thing, before sending him back to get the right one, in order to start the punishment proper. Plus the extras for wasting her time, of course.
It’s funny, because the next day she had a client who found her socks too stinky. Unlike this situation, she didn’t send him away straight away: instead, he stayed the night tied up on the floor, face down in a pile of laundry, as I understand it. But he had to apologise expensively too.
If he misbehaves, he’ll certainly experience days when he is much less happy – and not just over the next two weeks.
Nubbin has a giantess fetish and they each have a ‘making love to my girlfriend while this sad little guy remains locked in chastity’ fetish, so they’re very well suited to one another.
She’s a professional so she’ll castrate you anyway, even if she doesn’t enjoy it or see the point. I think that kind of dedication is to be celebrated, don’t you?

NB, nursenicoclinic appears no longer to be operating (pun intended) but if anyone can find someone to whom I should be crediting the image of this lovely if occasionally rather malpractising lady, please speak up.

Louring ladies

Don’t worry, lots of bridegrooms… no, hang on. Do worry.
This is her ‘girlfriend experience’ service and if you ask me, it’s startlingly realistic.
I used to think I was my own worst enemy, but my SO managed to wean me off those self-loathing thoughts by listing all the people (or at least, the top twenty among our close friends) who loathe me even more.
Good night, sweet princess.
You don’t need motivating, as you’ll be strapped down and helpless.
They serve coffee too – and water to help settle the boys’ stomachs, but most Mistresses prefer them unsettled.

Her gesture, motion, and her smiles

Her wit, her voice my heart beguiles.

You might imagine she’s indifferent to whether you agree or not, but disagreeing with her at this point will actually have quite an effect on what happens next. Just try it and you’ll see.
Find out what you mean to her.
It’s a bit tricky for a subbie, if the word of his goddess is as holy writ but she’s also inclined to say things as a joke. Oh well, no one ever said femdom had to be easy.
Surprisingly enough, one of her next tricks was a trucker into very pervy stuff, and it was a very lucky thing you were there to help her give him what he wanted. It just goes to show… don’t you think?
Oh dear, I hope it wasn’t anything important. I’m sure it’ll turn up somewhere when you get back from the honeymoon, anyway.
Billie appears not to have planned this very well but she’s being very nice about it.

Unselfish cruelty

Oh, OK. I’d previously always been told it was barely noticeable.
I dream an impossible dream about unfair maidens.
Oh dear. The poor thing. There is actually one little untruth in the account above – despite being so much younger than her poor dead husband, she’s actually more sexually experienced than him, as it happens. But I don’t think those kinds of prurient detail need to come out in court, do you? She’s suffered enough.
Lots of things are handwash-only, these days. For others, I’m allowed to use my mouth too.
I once tried sewing some pads into the base of some shorts I often wear around the house. Of course my SO discovered the ruse… and she was very unhappy about it. As she explained, it not only diminished the efefctiveness of any disciplinary measures she saw fit to impose, it also demonstrated ungratitude for all the efforts she makes. She was quite upset – and after she’d explained the point at length, I really felt her pain and I felt bad about it for a long time afterwards too. Don’t do it, guys.
I guess he got the good genes. And now he’ll have the chance to put some of them inside her.

Oh, and as you’re still here, a couple of links. Not ‘found femdom’ exactly (I think of that as being things in mainstream culture that hit our weirdly-situated buttons), as these are both from professional dominatrices but both are very lovely things that caught my eye.

First, the rather wonderful Domina M has taken to posting free videos on her web site. For the avoidance of doubt, the ‘rather’ in that sentence should be read as British delberate understatement to mean ‘absolutely, fantastically, brilliantly’ wonderful. All the videos are great. Rather cleverly (if I understand correctly), the latest one can be accessed directly, the full set need registration of an email address but are free.

More briefly, I thought this was delightful, reminiscent of course of that Orwell quote: “If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face— forever.” But more fun than a 1940s vision of a Stalinist totalitarian Britain.

Elegant arrogance

I once told a girl that I was really into sexy lingerie, and I got a full basket – all handwash only! Best date ever.
There’s no right and wrong way to do this sort of thing, of course: her method’s good, too.
My SO obviously has no personal experience of how painful her ‘little toys’ are, but she does like to hear all about it, in as much detail as I can shriek.
I once asked a pro-domme to choose her one favourite fantasy, for our session: whatever she wanted, no holds barred. So we played ‘Pay double and fuck off’, which turned out to be deliciously humiliating.
Trust is very important in a marriage – right up there with obedience.
There’s a tradition that the targets of the winning team get to go out to the winners’ podium with them – well, actually it’s better than that: they get to be the winners’ podium. So you could be in with a chance of participating in the medal ceremony.
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