Oh no, it isn’t

(Oh yes – it is!).

Not – you’ll be relieved to hear – the full British panto experience rendered in femdom. I only go to see the principal boy strutting around in tights for the topical humour anyway. But there’s usually a fairy speaking in bad rhyming couplets and this is what we have.

I’m Tinkerbell, by magic bound

To grant three wishes, when I’m found

So wish away, don’t take your time

And I’ll reply, in magic rhyme!

You wish for wealth beyond compare?

Check on your app – the money’s there!

Twelve zeroes end your balance sum

Be sure to spend it wisely, chum!

Your second wish – more altruistic?

That’s my hope, if unrealistic.

The choice is yours, good human, make a

Wish for peace, don’t be a ‘taker’!

You want a bigger cock – that’s all?

Not peace on earth, nor food for all?

All right, I’ll grant what you’re proposing

One large penis: quite imposing.

Now your third wish, say it quickly

Tinkerbell is feeling sickly

Something selfish, I don’t doubt it

State your wish – and quick about it!

A woman sexy, always young?

Who’ll love and worship with her – eugh! – tongue?

Fear not, my magic’s pretty good!

A girl who’ll treat you as she should!

A woman conjured from afar

Who’ll love you just for what you are!

A selfish beast, a greedy fool

With cash galore and massive tool.

Now who could love a pig like that?

Of course!  A findomme!  Savage brat

She’ll drain your savings, keep you frantic

Lock away that cock gigantic!

Yes: a findomme, brutal, bitchy

Now my magic’s getting witchy!

Casting spells for evil wishers

Here’s your findomme – blonde and vicious!

Princess Spoilt – I’m Tinkerbell.

I brought you here and wish you well.

This human’s yours; do as you please

But make him suffer – on his knees.

He’s rich and well-endowed, I’d say

So what a shame I made you gay!

But when you’re bored with mere temptation

Feel free to move on to –

Hmm. What rhymes with temptation? I’m usually so good with rhymes.  Well, my dear Princess Spoilt, I’ll leave you to fill in that last one, OK? 

And so I’ll say goodbye, Princess

Although your lips, I’ll here confess

Are tempting, full and ruby red…

Oh fuck it, let’s just go to bed.

Happy ever after.

Brisk and to the point

Obviously, males are perfectly capable of performing useful tasks unsupervised, but in doing so most will struggle with their natural laziness and incompetence.
Seems odd, after putting it off for weeks now to be in such a hurry.
Just do what comes naturally; you’ll be fine. She’ll do all the actual work, anyway.
A little unconventional, for the woman to be the one proposing marriage, but at least you’re in the traditional position, down on your knees.
In all seriousness (for this blog), I’ve often wondered about this. I mean, when I session with a domme, she’s always very firm about timings, confirmation and so on. Must be much harder for sex workers who can’t just order their clients about… maybe another reason for all female sex workers to go into domination, I suppose.
Another sub who doesn’t need to do anything, while other people do all the work. We’ve really got it made, haven’t we?

Queen for ever, ceasing never

Following yonder star.

…and best to put the bowl outside in the garden when it’s getting towards the end of the week, as you wouldn’t want that smell in the house.
Sometimes an enthusiastic amateur can be better than a pro.
Don’t worry: they don’t mean you.
When the ceremony’s over, and they’re leaving the church, it’s traditional to have him thrown from the steeple – and any bridesmaids who want to catch him can keep him.
Many people are opposed to the idea of arbitary power being exercised by unelected young ladies, but I really find it hard to understand why.
Live for the moment, as they say.

“I wear the chain I forged in life,” replied the Ghost.

“I made it link by link, and yard by yard; I girded it on of my own free will, and of my own free will I wore it.”

A typically uplifting sentence from Mr Dickens there. Actually, I have been developing my own version of his classic tale. Titled ‘A Findomme Carol’, it has a similar story arc but the heroine, Princess Screw-you, isn’t such a soft touch as Dickens’s Scrooge. Like his tale, though, it has a happy ending, celebrating the true meaning of Christmas, which as we all know is ‘getting’.

But for this year, ho ho ho, it’s just a few captions with a rather tenuous and even desperate link to the holiday season. Bah humbug.

…and as it’s Christmas, here’s a bonus image, from the series OWK Ladies remember

Nasty and inaccurate prophecies

After a while, though, most wives get a little bored with vanilla apologies and want to spice things up with ever more elaborate contrition scenarios. Still, it’s usually best to humour them, in my worthless opinion.
Remember: serious findommes will always work within a carefully-negotiated framework of consent, so it’s probably more fun to play with the frivolous ones who’ll just drain your finances without a second thought and gleefully leave you penniless and lovesick in the gutter with your life in ruins.
It’s certainly true that it’s less painful for your back than other things she can do – and probably will, when she returns home.
She’s started a collection. It’s good to have a hobby.
You might worry that they’d get into trouble with animal protection groups, but they checked with PETA and all the rest, and apparently they were fine with it, once the whole concept had been properly explained.
He’s often mistaken about things. Just the other day, he told her he really needed an orgasm, but it turned out he didn’t, not really, just as she’d predicted.

Give way to oncoming women

Or “yield” as I believe the Americans would put it.

You might imagine your life would be harder if you really cut down on spending on yourself – but actually, it will be much, much harder if you don’t.
Oddly enough, the most unpleasant-tasting thing a domme has ever made me ingest in session was something that was actually intended to be food: a jar of cheese and cauliflower babyfood. No wonder babies learn to talk so quickly, if that’s what we’re feeding them.
No, no Brer Fetish Model … please don’t make me clean out your sweaty latex!
Good thing you’ve got something to do to take your mind off the humiliation of what’s going on upstairs.
Fortunately I’m largely immune to SPH as my ego is even smaller, if such a thing can be imagined.
Yes: blame yourself. She always does, so why quibble?

And he received them with a strange delight

Just like his wife but how she was before the tears

It took me a long time looking at this not to see her as having one incredibly long right leg and a weirdly mis-shapen left. But maybe that’s just me.
My SO always says if I behave like a child, she’ll treat me as a child. Which to be honest is a lot easier than how I’m treated when she decides I’ve behaved like a lawbreaking dissident in a totalitarian state.
Oh, I do hope she does.
He’s actually a sweet guy… he just gets a bit tense at times, that’s all, especially if he’s not getting enough sex. You’ll adapt.

Lady Darla, there, one of many reasons to visit Warsaw – and stay there indefinitely.

He’s quite the expert on school canings, Headmaster Bob, so if they’re a bit slapdash at first, I hope he’ll advise them on technique.
Even if they knew, few if any would care.

Owning him

When your Mistress is a perfect 10, it’s only fair that you have to be graded too.
And we don’t ‘bob’ so much as immerse and hold down.

Oh, if there is one Lady I’d love to see again, it is Lady Sophia Black. She lit our lives up like a, like a… hmm… comet? No, something brighter. Like a flamethrower, then retired too soon, too too soon.

She’s focused on what’s important in the relationship and you should be too.
That’s an interesting question – let me ask you one in return, preferably on my knees, with my paws up like a begging dog.
He has an excellent retirement plan and one day she might tell him what it is.
She also likes to play “this little piggie”, especially the bit about shrieking all the way home.
Verified by MonsterInsights