Asking for it – Contemplating the divine

She’s the latest and the greatest of them all

Dommes and cats… am I right? Ever noticed that? Dommes and cats…

And a lot harder

The simply wonderful Amy Hunter. I once had the remarkable pleasure and the still more remarkable pain (mainly the tawse on the hands – ow!) of visiting her.

I have a purpose to my existence. My SO has promised some day to tell me what it is.

Arachnophobia play is quite culturally specific. In the UK it’s just a matter of harmless terror, but in Australia I’ve heard it ‘s considered quite edgy.

It wasn’t actually feeling that nervous – it’s just got one of those faces, you know? But it’s beginning to get a bit jittery right now.

Lady’s man

I certainly am… well, a lady’s boy, anyway.

There’s nothing like standing in the corner with a well-smacked bottom on display to give you a sense of perspective.

Her fees are reasonable. She isn’t, I’m glad to say.

I tried calling the NHS helpline once, because I thought it would be a turn-on to ask a nurse all sorts of questions about the safety of enemas and how to deal with unwanted erections. The nurse I ended up speaking to was very sympathetic and started taking me through all of the details – but I must somehow have let on that I was just phoning for the sexual turn-on, so it got a bit embarassing after that. Anyway, he was very nice and we’ve agreed to meet up some time after lockdown ends, so that ended well.

Sometimes a session starts badly, but I find when that happens the best thing to do is put it behind me and try to enjoy myself, anyway.

Wearing a shock collar can give you a sense of perspective too… along with a lot of very unpleasant electric shocks, obviously.

He might as well have buttons and bows

Mistress Kate, of course. I was reminded of her the other day, when a delightful domme made me dance and mime to Wuthering Heights. I fear I wasn’t very good at it and she mocked me mercilessly… some people can be so cruel.

If he’s lucky, he’s going to be a shower head. But he’s not been enormously lucky so far in his life, alas.

That reminds me of a date I went on once, actually. It was a pub quiz and our team came last but oddly it was only right at the end that my date told everyone she was the first and second prize. So I had to hang around for an hour or so, while the winning and runner-up teams collected their prizes. Then she said she was tired and just wanted to go home, so I walked with her. I thought I might be in with a chance but she said she never kisses on a first date, so that was that. Still: I didn’t get kneed in the balls, shat on or made to suck off any gay friends, so all in all I count the evening as a success. The second date didn’t go so well, unfortunately.

Lots of men make this mistake: she’s asked you about your day so she wanted to be asked about hers, right? Right? And now you have chores and you don’t have permission to speak, so it’s too late. You unfeeling brute.

If they’re quick they can catch happy hour. And then there’s a cabaret, but obviously they won’t have time to stay for that.

I’ve always had a weird phobia about Scrabble, ever since this girl I knew at school followed through on her threat to make me “eat my words”. The little tiles weren’t so bad on the way in, but even with rounded corners you can certainly feel the sharp edges when they come out again. I was bullied quite severely when I was at school – did I ever mention that? And afterwards, too, of course – but at school it was free of charge.

Boss ladies

I understand in most modern social media platforms it’s just one of the standard tickboxes when you sign up. Of course, you can always choose “Don’t like to say” or “It’s complicated!”

A really skilled domme can plant a billiard ball right up a slave’s anus from the far side of the table.

If it’s any consolation, the male warders are all very nice indeed, as long as the inmates are nice to them.

Love’s often not enough.

When they called the next day, she had a glass of wine and a vibrator ready. You know: just to help her cope with the trauma.

Oppressed desires


When I look at her, something about her gaze reminds me of my SO. And the woman in the picture looks like someone I know, too.

They do such a fine job: still delivering healthcare and anti-rape services to the nation despite all the financial cuts

Remember femdom rule number one: never engage in unsafe activities like really pissing your domme off.

I’ve heard there’s a game called Prison Architect but I’ll bet it doesn’t have as many options as this.

Actually, though, cigarette ash is low-calorie, fat free and even vegan. So it can be a very healthy part of a diet, mixed together with other foodstuffs, which is exactly how I take it.

Reasons to be fearful

You need to be careful about dehydration, as that can cause brain damage. So, if the sub’s higher brain functions are important to you, make sure you give him plenty of water. But if not, don’t worry about it.

Somehow I’m guessing that saying ‘no – sorry, I think there’s nothing here like that’ would not actually result in the beating being cancelled.

You just have to learn to masturbate without using your hands. Or moving.

It’s the difference between a cold, professional relationship and the warm partnership of a real marriage.

There’s a lot more of it, though.

Fear and loving

Oh, no. Not Lucy.

They do furnish a room.

It’s a good idea to have it written there on the fridge, to remind you both that it’s overdue. I’m sure she’ll get round to it, though – no need to nag.

Boring old politics. Still, you’d better go along to look pretty on her arm.

You could kiss and make up.

Begging her pardon

I’m ready for a fuck, too. Have been for several years, now. Oh well.

If they win this one, they’ll be up against the winners of the boys school competition, in the final. I think they’ll probably give the boys quite a hard time, don’t you?

Aww… sweet.

This is from the excellent Men are Slaves site, which in addition to the pay site identified on the photo, has a remarkably generous tumblr with free samples.