sissy – Contemplating the divine

Boy, you’re going to carry that weight

So don’t argue.

Don’t worry if you find the conversation about sex a little embarrassing – it’ll be very quick (although not quite as quick as the sex was).

You’ll observe that she’s holding an electric shocker remote in her left hand, which gives me confidence he’ll respond enthusiastically and with appropriate gratitude.

Lots of ladies send their sissies out proudly displaying every bruise they’ve been given, but Mrs Thornton’s more old-fashioned about that sort of thing.

It’s like a two-key system. But with only one key, obviously.

Slaves with bad knees who would find all-fours pony play particularly painful should always mention that in their OWK application forms, so the Ladies can take that into account when deciding on the activities. It’s like informing them of phobias about spiders or enclosed spaces: they always like to know.

Quite a few MPs found themselves subjected to an intense lobbying campaign, over this bill. Very intense indeed.

How ya feelin?

Hot hot hot!

Well, unless you’re in, I dunno, Svalbard or somewhere… New Zealand, maybe. But here in the UK it’s a hot, hot bank holiday (that’s a holiday in which everyone in the country dons a bowler hat and we all play at being bankers – it’s heaps of fun), so I thought a little ex tempore, al fresco and pudendo pessimus post, featuring sunny days, might be in order.

Male readers: if you are in the UK, bear in mind that temperatures are expected to reach 34 C, so if you’re not fully employed in vigorously fanning or bringing iced drinks to members of the superior sex, do make sure you’re wrapped up snugly with a padded latex hood and locked away in some stifling, airless box full of mosquitoes so you have a thoroughly miserable time, you worthless excuse for a human being.

Rest assured: you’ll get your chance to express your opinions, too. Desperate pleading and heartfelt gratitude foremost among them.

Important learning point here. Being a kindhearted soul, she deliberately kept quiet, when he spilled her drink a little while setting it down, just so the poor chap wouldn’t have to suffer a further flogging. And then the idiot did it *again*, later in the afternoon! Spare the rod – or the bullwhip – as she ruefully admitted to herself, watching him writhe and shriek in agony, while waiting for a turn with the whip herself.

Dogging is another British custom. It mostly takes place in summer, like this, but if you’re a sub visiting London, ask if your Mistress can organise a dogging session for you and I expect she’d be happy to, at any time of year, as long as she can wrap up warm. It’s a good way to meet lots of locals, if you’re travelling, albeit rather briefly and not necessarily seeing their faces.

It must be very distressing for her, poor thing.

Further figures

More captions loosely inspired by the comedic style (but not achieving the comedic effect) of the Far Side. Slightly more whimsical than usual, anyway. Whatever. Also more than the average amount of tennis.

But only if she says you can

Consent is so important in femdom, don’t you agree? So many men in the scene just don’t get that: but the way I see it, if you’re down on your knees and you want to get up but she doesn’t give her explicit consent, then that’s an absolute no-no. No ifs, no buts, no pleading. So what if your knees are hurting? Women have a right to decide what to do with their own males and that’s that.

Keep calm. It’s probably just one of those deals in which they remain attached to you but they’re ‘technically’ hers, you know? To kick and crush whenever she likes. Anyway, you might win. The King’s got to be the most powerful piece, right? And you’ve still got that.

If you think about it, it’s actually quite arrogant for a human male to think he deserves better treatment than a ‘real’ dog. I mean, dogs are quite intelligent, so if anything it should be the other way around.

Actually, one of the guys with a beard just behind her is wearing women’s slacks* under his shorts, so it’s not just you.

Just another stunningly beautiful woman (Nata Lee), lounging around in red lingerie until she gets cross and decides it’s time to put you over her lap and smack your bottom until you cry. Contemplating the Divine… because ‘real life’ is over-rated.

Of course the normal guys don’t pay anything like as much for making the mess as you have to to clean it up. But then if life was fair I guess we wouldn’t have femdom.

Anya’s a lot more relaxed and open about her AFM past then many A-listers. No names but if you happen to own a copy of April 2013, there’s a certain Hollywood megastar actress who’d pay a lot to get hold of it and remove it, permanently… or would pay someone else a lot to do the same to you.

I’m not a crossdresser (not by choice, anyway) but this actress’s understanding but ever so slightly amused expression is just perfect, don’t you think?

Woman’s inhumanity to man

Which is obviously fine, humanity being properly reserved for humans not apes or maggots.

I’ve heard the trick is to think about other things, OK? The two weeks will fly by. Now hurry up with that lotion: she’s waiting.

And if you’re *not* actually her 4 o’clock pervert, just go on up anyway. She isn’t particular.

Realistic goals, firm boundaries, severe consequences. Secret of a happy marriage, right?

She’s right, they’re already starting to look ugly and horrible.

Particularly disappointing given the ants’ matriatrchal society. You’d think they’d at least have a nibble… ant cannot live on honey alone.

Even the grimmest, most unpleasant situations can benefit from a little joke, he always used to say.

Incidentally, my captions here often feature the wonderful Mistress Eleise (with whom I had the pleasure and pain in Paris of a session or three) objecting to blonde jokes. But that’s just my invention. Maybe she really likes them, collects them and treasures examples in which the blonde is being particularly dumb? If anyone visits Canada and if she’s still working, do try a few out and let us know how it goes.