Nonsensical sex

More of these.

Aren’t you just the perfect host? Sorry, I meant pervert. The pervert host.
I always get so excited on Pervemas morning, waiting to be unwrapped.
I don’t know what they pay those sweatboys for. Oh, don’t they? Oh, OK. Even so, there’s no excuse for not doing a professional job.
I don’t know what it is about the phrase “Purely routine anal probe” but I feel (deep inside me) it’s not used enough in our own world.
Although everyone says that no one carries coins these days, public shining posts like this one (like the many coin-operated public lavatories you can still find chained up with gaping mouths in Pervworld) often end the day with a rectum uncomfortably full of change.
It’s a lot greener than most other forms of transport, especially since a lot of their fodder is recycled.

4 thoughts on “Nonsensical sex”

  1. A word of advice for new players in the knicker hunt. It all seems like fun and games with just the occasional mild thrashing/severe beating thrown in for good measure, but they don’t warn you that you are expected to return all the garments to the correct owner. Heaven help you if you get one wrong.
    Experienced players know to keep track of every undergarment you come into contact with during the year, maintaining an up-to-date database cross-referencing colours, sizes and fashions to the owners. That way you might escape with just a brutal whipping at the end of the day.

    1. Very wise, Gamelan, very wise.

      Some subs get very competitive too. At our knicker hunt, the Pervemas before last, my cousin Tom and one of my Aunt’s boys (I can never remember any of their names) got into a fight over one item and ended up ripping it in half. Needless, to say, both had a Pervemas to remember – not to mention several months of pocket money being withheld to pay for the replacement item.

      Ah brutal whippings… the very spirit of Pervemas, don’t you think?

      Best wishes


      1. Well, the ladies did cotton on to our little database scheme one year and decided to play a ‘funny’ little prank on us and all get identical panties for the hunt. That led to a spirited debate between the ladies and the boys as to who could realistically identify their own panties, but despite the ironclad nature of our arguments we still lost and the canes got well used that day.

        Poor Brian, he had been severely whipped the day before for putting too much sugar in his owner’s tea (something about her being sweet enough already). He was especially motivated to avoid a caning on Perv-mas so he really argued the point. His poor owner was so embarrassed by his back talk that she took him straight down to the castration clinic the next morning. She still brings him to Perv-mas, more as a warning to the rest of us.

        1. It’s not whether you win or lose, though, really, is it Gamelan? The important thing is that everyone has fun together – a point that Brian seems to have misunderstood. Perhaps he’ll see the funny side in time.

          Best wishes


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