business – Page 2 – Contemplating the divine

Managing directrices

Their ‘at your desk’ service is very popular. Alternatively, they can just take control of your male employees remotely and sort the problem out that way, but most of their users prefer to watch them work in person.

Well… OK. Sounds pretty standard to me. Do they have good wi fi?

He hasn’t been told himself yet, so I expect he’s eager to hear your guesses.

The wonderful, clever and lovely Tiffany Naylor, who nayled me good and proper a few years back. I still have the warm glow.

There’s always extras. Still, probably worth it for the talented Sven. If she enjoys card games, for example, he could play Gin Rummy all evening and poker all night.

They’re not designed that way, but why not give it a go?

Just as long as she understands that she can’t force you to do anything your wife’s not comfortable with.

Spoken for

She’s already apologised to her sister on your behalf, but that doesn’t mean you won’t be going round to her place to apologise directly, too – and offer to make amends, of course.

Must be terrifying being tiny. Good thing there are big strong girls like her around to look after you.

Understandable that he wants to make sure, given that the two of them will be working so closely together every day, but sometimes a candidate arrives at an interview and just makes such a strong impression from the start that you know she’s going to get the job.

That’s the divine Heather, being contemplated in the scene above.

Many people don’t realise that in English, like very gendered languages such as Japanese, there are words that women can use that men cannot. But there are.

Sometimes an unexpected, spur-of-the-moment session can be best. One time, for instance, I was walking home late at night and clumsily bumped into one of a group of girls. Given no time to apologise properly, I was beaten up, kicked repeatedly in the balls and face, robbed, spat on and left penniless lying in a side-alley. When you think of all the emails and careful arrangements you’d need to do that with a pro-domme….

Good boys always follow

As Ms Harry said, and I don’t think there’s any arguing with that.

I’m just relieved that the pins all the bridesmaids were issued with are for symbolic purposes. I’d imagined… well, it doesn’t matter, does it?

Males have difficulty sometimes in following through the logical consequences of their own statements. It’s not really their fault, they’re just morons.

Her company takes bullying very seriously. So does she.

Part of the reason the Kerbside Sexist Service is so popular, of course, is the generous rebates of up to 1000% on the subscription fee, paid by the sexists themselves. It makes ‘peace of mind’ very affordable.

Yeah, weird that. Mine are mostly for locksmiths, for reasons I’ve never understood, but at least that’s not something my SO could find objectionable, I suppose.

She is your everything

… which is just as well, as you’re her nothing.

Oddly enough, I was actually engaged in SPH play years before I even knew what it was – in the school changing room, for instance. I guess I’m just a natural.

Don’t worry, she generally just takes little light puffs, she doesn’t pull on it to drag it down quickly. Unless she’s had a hard day or something like that, obviously.

In a very real sense, marriage to her is a stress position, so it’s all good practice.

I find being on a leash quite reassuring. My SO got one of those extendable ones – you know, that have a kind of wheel that can pay out to allow the pet to run off some way – and I have to say, I felt almost agoraphobic with it on. Unfortunately, it broke one day when I was fetching it, and after a good hard discussion of why ‘it broke’ I was dragged out of the door on the good old chain.

Bunnies are actually savage little creatures. True fact (read Watership Down). Perhaps that’s what inspires these lovely ladies.

Hmm… looks like Jake was a bit surprised by that! He really shouldn’t have been – anyone could have guessed that Bluetooth connectivity was likely to come up. Now he’s going to get all embarrassed by having his ignorance shown up right there on stage.

Number 42 in the series, apparently! How many roads must a man walk down before he reaches a turning point, eh? OK, one, I suppose, as if he was on a second road he would presumably already have passed a turning point. OK, so not a good analogy, but you see what I’m trying to say here, right? Erm… anyway, I’ll just get on with the not-quite-femdom captions, now.

Wicked, flagitious, tyrannical acts

If you’re worried about whether you’ll be able to please her sexually – don’t be. You have plenty of pain receptors and a full set of vocal chords, and that’s all you’ll need.

Obviously, I visit sex workers, although I have to confess I’ve never really understood why the ladies I visit call themselves by that title.

Looks to me like they’re considering him quite seriously already. I think he’s got a good chance of getting through to the next stage: in-depth assessment.

She’s just looking for the right man. I’m sure when she does find him, she’ll keep him.

I expect he’ll be taking those opportunities; it would be so ungrateful not to.

Turn it into love

Or into something. Music is by the divine M i s t r e s s Kylie. Equally importantly, it has the word ‘turn’ in the title, which is the clue as to today’s theme.