Category: ball-kicking

Just wrap me up in chains

I’m not thinking of escape.

Why would I want to go anywhere? Here’s good.
She’d discipline you herself, but she’s too tenderhearted.
Why complicate matters? Sometimes all you need is a whip, a helpless victim, a remote location and an iron-clad alibi.
There are charities that will take care of widowed men, but I’ve heard they can be pretty brutal. So, I think you’re better off with her. Try keeping your silly men’s libber nonsense to yourself; that should help.
Wow – in with a chance, here!
Don’t worry – it’s perfectly normal to find things a little uncomfortable when current and former girlfriends get together. Even if you weren’t dangling from a hook with your legs held wide apart by a spreader bar, it would be a stressful situation.

Brisk and to the point

Obviously, males are perfectly capable of performing useful tasks unsupervised, but in doing so most will struggle with their natural laziness and incompetence.
Seems odd, after putting it off for weeks now to be in such a hurry.
Just do what comes naturally; you’ll be fine. She’ll do all the actual work, anyway.
A little unconventional, for the woman to be the one proposing marriage, but at least you’re in the traditional position, down on your knees.
In all seriousness (for this blog), I’ve often wondered about this. I mean, when I session with a domme, she’s always very firm about timings, confirmation and so on. Must be much harder for sex workers who can’t just order their clients about… maybe another reason for all female sex workers to go into domination, I suppose.
Another sub who doesn’t need to do anything, while other people do all the work. We’ve really got it made, haven’t we?

Without discipline, there’s no life at all

Katharine Hepburn said that. And this [edit] is a picture of Audrey Hepburn, so the picture, like the Hepburns, is unrelated. Thanks to Downlow, low down in the comments for pointing this out. I’ll get me coat…

I’d have to say yes please. Ma’am.

“Readers” with an interest in Hollywood actresses may want to check the blog this coming Sunday. Just saying…

Don’t worry, it’s never too late to fill in any gaps in your schooling. I mean, I went to a school that didn’t have corporal punishment but look at me now.
She’s good with pain. He’s not.
Like many women, she’s discovered she doesn’t need high heels to come across as assetive and commanding.
I’m not sure she’s taking this seriously enough. She ought to have realised already that you did tell them how you felt about it, repeatedly, throughout the nine hours. Not quietly, true, but they were definitely told.
Silly Raoul. I hope he doesn’t feel too embarassed about his mistake, watching her play while busting out all over the place. Maybe she can find some way of cheering him up, in the breaks between sets.
Let the joy enter and fill your whole being.

Seductive reasoning

I break easily.

 

Simon, like many alphas, sometimes finds it hard to understand subs.  It’s not his fault, of course: it’s because he’s a male and males are stupid.

 

 

She briefly renamed him “Whiny, pleady pathetic cry-baby” but ended up with the rather unsurprising “Skinny Bastard”. 

 I believe this sweet lady is Mistress Tess.  I’m sure she can help you, too, discover a new healthier lifestyle, if you ask very nicely.

 

 

Lots of men have irrational fears about castration. OK, just occasionally those fears might be rational but there’s no point in brooding on these things and letting them ruin your life.

 

 

 

The World Sadistic Games are much more fun to watch than regular sporting competitions.  The Ladies’ Javelin, for instance, which not only involves strength and the ability to throw far but also tests the athletes’ aim.

 

 

The nymphs tread out their ground, fa la

 .. for now is the month of Maying.  Fa la la la la la la la.


A latex-shining session?  Pah – that’s practically vanilla.  You’ve got a proper femdom activity booked, you have, so go ahead and enjoy every authentic moment of it.



That’s a shame, as the date was going quite well up to that point.  Maybe they’ll leave you their phone numbers.





My SO is fine with me deciding for myself what I want to eat when we go out to a restaurant.  She doesn’t usually let me have it, of course.


Don’t worry, she’s only planning to shoot to wound.  Much more fun that way.

The shapely ankles and calves within these elegant boots belong to Miss Chambers, of Cruella fame.  Now if only we could see her lovely, lovely nose too.



That’s a good clause.  I have it tattooed on me, just in case I ever forget.



Oh, and as a little bonus, I just discovered this delightful thing and felt compelled to share it. 

#Chris Pine from Entertainment Weekly

More in indifference than in anger

Actually, female spiders eat their mates in only a minority of spider species and you’re in luck – the one that bit her is not from one of them.  So I’m not even sure why she’s doing this, actually, but I’m sure if you point that fact out she’ll let you go.

 


Actually, the company medical plan does cover males but only for a few, specified surgical procedures.

 

 

 

Just go with it, see where it takes you.  She’s not going to rush anything, plenty of time.

 

You might develop a foot fetish, eventually.  And if you can develop a fetish for doing chores too you should have a very enjoyable marriage.  Oh – and findom, too.  Yeah, you definitely want to try to get into findom because there’s going to be a lot of that.
 
 
 

Irony… it’s like rain on your wedding day – which actually isn’t all that ironic, it’s just bloody uncomfortable, take it from me, especially when you’re chained up naked outside the church waiting for the bride.


 

Girlish ferocity

I just have resting silly grumpy-face.  When I don’t have resting screamy pleading-face, anyway.

 

 

It’s supposed to be quite effective in preventing premature baldness… or was that ‘laziness’?  All good, either way – just ask Helen.

 

Of course, she might do that even if he doesn’t make her.




And don’t forget to wag that cute little rubber dildo-tail.

 

 

 


 

I remember my first, fumbling attempts at sexual intercourse!  Embarrassingly bad, like most men I suppose.  I can laugh about it now, along with the guests whenever my SO tells the story, but at the time it was quite humiliating, especially with all those other guys there.  I suppose a second time needn’t be quite such a… a shall we say ‘cringe-inducing failure’ but as my SO likes to say, ‘why risk it?’

 

 

And now for something largely similar

Right… ten more years then.  The terrible teens begin here.  How terrible can they be?  Let’s find out, shall we?

 

 

He should be thankful.  Not for anything in  particular – just generally, all the time.

 

 

Regrettably, he won’t be perfect for long.  She breaks things.

 

 

 

It is a good one.  Here’s another: what do you do if you see a blonde undressing, through an open window?  Eight years hard labour!  Do you get it?  Maybe one day you will.

 

 

Look at the lovely lady on the right, there.  Rightly proud of her work.

 

 

 

‘Something plausibly similar to male genitalia’ is the best some of us can hope for.




Looks like all those caning fantasies are going to come true.




Bad Pookie.  Just imagine being close to thinking about disobeying her like that!  On second thoughts, don’t imagine it… she wouldn’t approve.



If there was anything she could do to make you feel better, she’d do it – you know that, right?



Anyway, maybe some of the other patrons would like to skip the queue too.


 

Ooh – the tips of her shoes look just like the inside of my chastity belt!  Maybe we could strike up a conversation, now I know we’ve something in common.




And, of course:




Unoriginal sins





Don’t worry: you’ll feel her pain






It probably wouldn’t say anything very interesting, to be honest.  Mostly whiny pleading.  They’re not missing anything.


Like many male teachers in girls’ secondary schools, he often finds himself being the teacher who has to deal with the bullies.
I understand that if you actually open them up, by breaking the flesh from whipping too hard for example, you can void the warranty.  But it doesn’t sound like she’s done that, so it’s probably OK.









She’s not a pro-domme, anyway, because to the eternal howls of anguish from love-sick slaves, I believe Lady Sophia Black has retired.

Written submissions



There’s actually a funny story to how I came by that nickname.  Just ask anyone.







Lots of men find it hard to navigate the unwriten rules of modern office etiquette, which is why it can be so useful to receive feedback that is frank, immediate and eye-wateringly painful when the inevitable occasional slip-ups occur.

Another word Auntie Kate can teach you is ‘sadist’ but that’s for another day.
For the grand finale they invite members of the audience to step up and join them.

Myself, I’m not too choosy about clothing – I just wear whatever happens to be locked onto me that morning, you know?