Contemplating the divine – Page 75 – Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.

The Garden of Earthly Delights

Obviously, anyone’s bound to feel a bit nervous before having a microchip inserted into their brains, but just ask any man who’s had it done – you’ll hear nothing but gratitude.

They’re quite smart, those ‘rate my date’ sites. I tried sneakily entering a positive review about myself and I was automatically redirected to ratemywank.com. Where I built up quite a profile, actually, until my SO stopped all that nonsense.

One positive thing is that he has discovered he and his father-in-law have a lot in common, so that’s nice.

Mmm… edgy. Let’s hope she doesn’t get too drunk this time.

Despite the general female-led tendency of this blog, I want to make clear that I think it is OK to have disagreements between husband and wife in marriage. I disagreed with my SO once, very early on in our life together, and although it was painful – very painful, actually – I think we both found it to be a learning experience that made our marriage stronger.

The good old days

More images from those golden years before society went to the dogs. When chaps went out to rule the empire with nothing more than a cleft stick, a good solid education thrashed into them at one of the better public schools and a memsahib with firm opinions about household management.

It’s more Downton domination.

Chaps back then weren’t supposed to cry in public, but you know I’m willing to bet that tears flowed from time to time in the privacy of the marital chamber, whenever men recalled their school years with the help of their loving wives.

She seems like rather a forward young lady, proposing a trip to the kinema (‘pictures’ indeed – and she a schoolmistress!) before she has even been properly introduced! Still, she seems to have some sound ideas in her head, so I suppose it’ll be all right.

I suppose a little fresh air while he was being thrashed never did a chap any harm.

Funny, really – after hating the floggings and humiliations inflicted at school, to find oneself married to a girl who likes nothing better than to apply the same methods. It does make you wonder if there might be something in all that guff that Freud chappie writes, don’t you think?

I always thought there was something a bit rum about that stable boy with the long hair. Tell you what – pay close atention to the noises he makes when he’s buggering you. If he’s enjoying it too much, we might have a homosexual on our books – and I imagine the Police would like to be informed about that!

Not so far, far away

More tales of fairy femdom, especially for those whose dommes do not permit a ‘happy ending’.

If I had three wishes, the world would be a very different place.

She always lost at musical statues, when she was a little girl. Maybe that’s where her anger comes from?

She’s not the sweet, obedient little princess she might apear, you know. Anticipating just this sort of thing, she carefully hid a couple of young men in a secret room deep below the castle, to play with if ever her usual toys were taken away from her. After all, a girl has to have some fun.

Bicycle races are coming your way, so forget all your duties oh yeah!

Ribbit?

Written submissions

There’s actually a funny story to how I came by that nickname. Just ask anyone.

Lots of men find it hard to navigate the unwriten rules of modern office etiquette, which is why it can be so useful to receive feedback that is frank, immediate and eye-wateringly painful when the inevitable occasional slip-ups occur.

Another word Auntie Kate can teach you is ‘sadist’ but that’s for another day.

For the grand finale they invite members of the audience to step up and join them.

Myself, I’m not too choosy about clothing – I just wear whatever happens to be locked onto me that morning, you know?

Furious feminine

It’s not that ironic. He strongly disapproved of it while it was being done to him, too – more so than ever, if anything.

“We” did, although only only one of us did most of the actual talking, as I recall it.

You might want to refer her to your own ‘FAM’ – that’s ‘Frantic Appeals for Mercy’

The simply divine Mistress Heather. I for one would love to kiss the air above that foot tattoo, and even closer if allowed.

Thank goodness she realised you needed to be locked in chastity too. How awful it would be to be locked in a prison cell for months without any ability to suffer the erotic frisson of enforced chastity at the same time.

She also has a carving knife.

Viral captions

So the thing is still out there, doing its thing. A few more captioned images about the thing.

It seems like it’s been going forever, like the longest ever corner time but without the delicious sense of humiliation. I suppose it will end eventually, and we creepy freaks can return to abnormality. One day, perhaps people will even look back on this blog and laugh. Unlikely, I’ll admit.

For those of you worried I might get ill and die: I have actually been practising social distancing and self isolation since before it was a thing. Mainly at parties. Plus, I’m told that to suffer a life-threatening condition, you have to have a life, so I think I’m fine.

Society for the Promotion of Cruelty

Possibly insufficient levels of whatever hormone it is induces feelings of terror, too.

I once paid for this stunningly beautiful escort to go with me to a party. She was supposed to laugh at my jokes but I think her agency must have messed things up because in the event, she laughed at everything except my jokes. Still, it was lovely being with her, at least until she got off with my best friend and abandoned me. Quite expensive, though.

Looks cosy.

It’s the sound of one hand clapping.

This the lovely Amy Hunter, who once left me battered, bruised and happy. She has startlingly blue eyes and a startlingly painful tawsing technique too.

It’s funny how dommes constantly insist on being thanked for stuff like this. Do you think maybe they have self-esteem issues?

Ladies First

It is. We so easily lose sight of what’s really important in this world.

Ah… the Police. They never do anything, do they? You know, a few weeks ago I filed a detailed report about how I had been kidnapped by five young blonde lesbians and they put a collar and chain on me, then dressed me in a frilly maid’s dress and made me lick their boots clean, while they kissed and cuddled each other wearing various latex and leather outfits – and do you know what? The Police said they thought I’d made it all up!

No rush. You’re not going anywhere.

Many men who’ve been on the course say it was a life-changing, eye-opening experience. They’re all very, very grateful.

Not too much, mind. Don’t want to make it too easy.

Words of praise

Look at that… she gets to have a mug of rich, steaming coffee… and Raoul’s coming round later, too.

Things just haven’t been the same between us since Humpy Hippo moved in.

If you like Humpy Hippo, then you might also like Mr Floppyears because it’s basically the same caption.

I remember as a child running excitedly to the door to let the District Disciplinary Officer in, while Dad grovelled for mercy at my Mum’s feet. These days you can order a beating on-line, but it’s not the same.

It’s silly to criminalise sexism. Men are better than women at lots of things and it shouldn’t be a crime to say so. Hard labour, for a start: we’re really good at that.