science fiction – Page 3 – Contemplating the divine

It Came From Outer Space

And this is how the message ran…

She should put him in the stocks. ‘Cos the sonic doesn’t work on wood.

I believe there are still traces from which civilisation could be reconstructed, under the guidance of the Galactic Community.

I think you’re about to experience their rigorous clinical testing procedures personally

I would just like to point out that as an arachnophobe, I did not at all enjoy searching Google images for the picture on the right hand side in the background there. I suffered for my art. Now it’s your tur – oh, I did that one already, didn’t I?

I don’t really understand how anyone can be an atheist, in a world that contains Arianna Grande.

What’s that you say, blog ‘reader’? You don’t think this one fits in with the overall science fiction theme of today’s post? Oh yes, it does. You see: this is your future.

Divine Order

I worship her divine shadow.

I’ve had a few bruising relationships myself, but I usually have to pay for them.

Unless she forgets, obviously.

It’s obviously preying on her mind, the poor thing.

I pay a sex worker to have vanilla intercourse, once a month. She usually sends me a picture of the lucky guy.

She’ll get round to yours. You just need to wait very patiently. Try shifting your weight from side to side a bit if your knees are starting to hurt.

We shall not see their like again

Not
really a femdom post. But farewell, to the late and great Paul
Darrow. Jacqueline Pearce passed last year. Thanks for the ’80s, both of you.

Not really a femdom image, I’ll admit.

Oh, but this so is.

Now isn’t that a sweet gesture? I actually had the honour once of meeting and playing with Mistress Servalan in Sydney and very lovely and creative she is.

Not quite sure what’s going on here, but given the theme of this blog, we’ll assume Servalan’s winning.

That’s more like it. Definitely a punishment sesssion

…and some post-session aftercare too.

And I will bare my soul in time

…when I’m kneeling at your feet.

I think we can agree, though, that it’s hardly femdom to expect men to do their share of the ironing. Including – obviously – making up for the backlog of several thousand years when they didn’t.

So we did. I wonder what we’ll decide today.

Good thing there’s a woman in charge to take those tough decisions.

Sissy didn’t actually understand the book anyway. Men should go out to work, take decsions, look after their own lives? Terrifiying.

It’s a bluff. I think it’s a bluff.

What a piece of work is woman

Hmm… well, I’ll give it a go, I suppose. She needs to stop buying me so many books, though. I still haven’t finished The Joy of Ironing and I haven’t even started Getting to “Yes Ma’am”

Men can be stupid like that.

Not seeing a breathing tube… she needs to think about her safety standards. Burial play is a lot of fun, especialy on the beach where the tides give it that extra edge, but you need to play safe.

She likes simple things. That’s why she keeps you around.

I’m sure their scientists have a lot to teach us.

Slap me on the patio

I’ll take it now.

There must be lots of things you can do to take your mind off sex. Do some laundry maybe… or watch TV. The women’s tennis final is on, I understand. That should be exciting. Or beach volleyball. Anyway, it’s only for a few weeks, right?

My SO can be quite hard to please. I found it a bit dispiriting at first but then I learned about this technique for lowering the expectations you set yourself? So now I just aim for ‘Not totally furious with me’ and I hit that at least two days out of three, so that’s pretty good.

Unlike some human women, though, they won’t insist on going again while you’re still completely drained from the last time.

I took a personality test once. Apparently I don’t have one.

Don’t worry, she’s obviously not going to drain you to an empty husk all in one go. Look at that figure – she probably limits herself to a couple of pints of blood a day. You might even last a week.

Miss-judged

I’ve been a very bad wolf.

Actually, there’s a funny story about this one. It turned out there were no fewer than three Miguels on the beach! So as you can imagine things got a little embarassing – and of course we soon ran out of condoms and beer, so I had to run back to the shop. Still, it all worked out OK in the end.

You can cary an orgasm donor card, you know: ‘I want to help someone come when I die’? Not that it really makes much difference, but prior consent is a thing with some people.

I think he’s looking at her funny now. Some men never learn, huh?

And the evening, and the next day too, if need be. One wrist can outlast a great many bottoms, as any schoolmistress will attest.

She’s pure as New York snow

and if you’re lucky I expect she’ll tease you.

I expect she was just joking. Like the castration stuff – you shouldn’t take her too seriously when she says things like that.

Well, OK, as long as I don’t have to try to be brave.

So she should.

It worked on the first seven males she encountered. Not the brightest, human males, are they?

Two lonely people… why not give it a go? What’s the worst that can happen?

I’m gonna give you some terrible thrills

Like a…

Earth… it’s like a drive-in burger bar for hungry space travellers.

My signalling organ is permanently set to ‘silent mode’.

Not going to work – you need to use an internationally recognised safeword as established by the Geneva Convention. In Esperanto.

I’m sure he’d like to apologise to her and to women in general, for the thoughtless behaviour that got him into his mess. Trouble is, that mouth’s not really built for speaking. Plus, everyone he’s going to meet from now on is likely to be a man.

What do you mean, it’s not science fiction? This is your future.

Fragile masculinity

…and that’s a precious thing, because – oops! Dropped it. Oh well. I never really used it anyway. I’ll fetch a dustpan and brush, shall I, Ma’am?

Now that sounds like a man who’s strong enough to say sorry.

We hold these truths to be self-evident. That all men are created feral.

Perhaps if you save up, you could buy her time for an evening or something. On your wedding anniversary, for example. That would be a nice gesture.

Divorce in haste, repent at leisure. The positive thing is that he’s actually still seeing quite a lot of his wife, which I think is very healthy.

It’s called ‘I dare you even to think about not telling the truth, you devious little brat.’