All under control

 …just as it should be.

 

This image reminds me a bit of my first sexual partner, although the heel is a slightly different shape.

 

 

 

She’s actually never done a humiliation session before – but it turns out she’s a natural.

 

 

Fortunately, he has a very sophisticated palate, so whatever it is – or used to be – I’m sure he’ll be able to work it out.

 

 

 

Mainly, it’s the abuse, to be honest.

 

 

 

Poor dear man.  So very old.  So very dead.  I hope she gets over it quickly, so she can live a full life for him.  He’d have wanted that.

 

 

 

Scream queens

I never went trick-or-treating as a child – it was just an American thing in those days – but it’s everywhere now.  We often get complimented on how much effort we’ve made to make the house look like a spooky haunted house of torture and pain, but really it’s just the outdoor summer toys (which are occasionally used in winter too, when I’ve been particularly bad).  Halloween does have the advantage of being the evening on which I can answer the door without having to conceal my chains, I suppose, which is nice.

Nothing terribly spooky about today’s captions, I’m afraid, but I’ve tried to choose some at the darker end of what is already rather a sombre spectrum. 


Well, I think that’s disgraceful.  She shouldn’t have taken the veil if she doesn’t believe in it.  It should be a spiritual calling, not just an excuse for hot latex-clad lesbian sex while torturing naked males. Too many people just do religion for the ritual, to my mind.

 

 

Ooh – like a college reunion?  I wonder what activities they’ve got planned.



“Erm… oh gosh, now look here, errrrmmmmm!”  etc


With the birds.  Where else are they going to go?  Don’t worry, though: they’re not predatory.  Those curving beaks are just for cracking nuts.



Don’t worry, Mistress will be back soon. How long can you stay in a beach bar with a bunch of guys, anyway?


Oh go on, then: have a Halloween-themed extra that is explicitly not about Halloween.


 



Rule 18

A while ago I published one of my helpful posts aimed at novice dommes and subs, drawing upon my years of experience to give guidance – top tips, so to speak – so the new generation can avoid the mistakes of its predecessors. 

Within that, I suggested what has become known – to me at least – as ‘Servitor’s Rule 18’, namely:

 

https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7UlL2mRvU8Y/XgzH_-XPRbI/AAAAAAAANNM/qKX2yEBYCfUqBm5r5BDDZNSCzVHSENF2ACLcBGAsYHQ/s1600/SC_Caption_Novicedomme18.jpg 

 

Since then, I keep coming across* images online which can only cause me to think that no one reads this blog.  Rule 18 violations abound.  Here are a few – just a few – examples

 

 

CFEM play: Clothed Female, Exhibited Male.  Note, however, that most clients admitting to a fetish for ‘exhibitionism’ are unlikely to be seeking to be put in a glass case with a small type-written card explaining their provenance and archaeological significance. But for those that do: Rule 18 applies.

 

 

Eskimo play (more properly called Inuit play nowadays) is actually straightforward enough if you happen to own a punishment igloo and have access to dried seal meat. However, most clients request the domme to wear an outfit (not shown) that can be hot and uncomfortable, so this qualifies for Rule 18.

 

 

 

 

Servitor top tip: if the scene requires knowledge of industrial chemistry it’s probably a Rule 18 violation.

 

 

 

Dalek dress | Doctor who cosplay, Doctor who costumes, Dalek costume
Actually, this one’s quite a turn-on for me.  Now where’s my sonic?

 

 

 

Known in the business as ‘Violet Beauregarde play’, I believe.  Dommes attempting it are advised not to use pumps that can exceed the officially recommended pressure (and if not sure, should undertake the inflation in an open public space).

 

 

 

Ah, yes: ‘Latex nun birdcage guy’.  My SO remembers sessioning with him. She still has the birdcage somewhere.


 

Rule 18… so very Rule 18.

 

 

NB: for anyone taking this all too seriously (a) you’re reading the wrong blog, mate; (b) YKINMK-ETDAMTLN-BIRYKAAMKAFWT**.

 

* Note to self: remember to add feeble ejaculation-related pun down here. 

** Your kink is not my kink – except the dalek and maybe the latex nun – but I respect your kink and anyway my kinks are fucking weird too.  

Craven cravings

 

It’s not that Robert can’t do his own, obviously.  But you’re so much better at it than him – and so much worse at sex.  It just makes sense all round.


 

You’ll notice she hasn’t said you have to decide quickly, as she’s getting a lot of interest from other potential occupants?  That’s because she isn’t and anyway, she’s already decided.

 

 

A cover’s probably best.  They’re quite compassionate, the two of them, so having something unpleasant like that in sight could ruin what they had planned to be rather a special moment.

 

 

Ah… back in the time when the gimp suit came off at the end of the day. I miss that stage of our relationship, but times change, I suppose, and we move on.

 

 

 

It’s best not to quibble about the word ‘enjoy’.  It’s like the word ‘slavery’ – means different things to different people.


Ghastly perversions

 

She finds she meets interesting people when she walks you in the park.  And tedious but enslaveable ones too.


 

 

She’s a very spiritual person, as you can tell.

I don’t know what the bad things were in my brain that the doctor removed but there must have been a lot of them, because it’s very empty now.  Thank goodness I have a loving wife to remember things for me.

 

The taste of ‘shut the fuck up’ will always be associated for me with the sharp, painful feeling of ‘because I say so’.

 

 

Or he won’t.  Whatever.


Good harmful fun

 …and nothing wrong with that.


They take pain management very seriously.




It’s best to double-check these things.  I’ve been on at least two dates which ended up in an argument relating to a confusion between inches and centimetres – and on one of them my so-called ‘date’ actually beat me up.


Obviously, we should be trying to encourage more women to go into STEM subjects.  Because technical progress and science are important – so best not left to morons.



That’s a relief.  I was worried.





It just shows I’m a red-hot lurrve machine, surely?



Wisdom of the aged

As I am, with no false modesty, a rather ‘experienced’ player (although yet to score a point), I often find myself being asked questions by dommes* and subs alike, and I am only too willing to share what scraps of wisdom I have acquired over the years.  There have been posts on advice to a novice sub, and also those offering respectful and tentative advice to novices trying out the domme side of the ‘relationship’.  Some might say that this is presumptuous, indeed impertinent.  My own view, for what it’s worth, is that they are quite right.  It is, and here’s more of it. What a bad, bad Servitor.


Especially without a riding whip.  She’s not going anywhere any time soon, I’m afraid.



Plus, if they want handjobs at the end of the session, they can actually have them, for a change.  Blow jobs even – why not?



Alternatively, don’t bother if you don’t care which is which.



Or, again, don’t bother. He can hold it in.  Rubber bands help.



Mmmm. I think the lady in this picture might be wondering how to preserve her in-session air of effortless superiority, having just broken the rule. She needn’t: we love and worship them whatever they do.


* Most of the questions from dommes are along the lines of “Is that supposed to be a present?”, “Are you going to cry again?”, “Haven’t you finished yet?” or “What the fuck are you still doing here?” but the answers to those just involve simple yes/no plus apology options, so I won’t go into details.

Ladies First



It is.  We so easily lose sight of what’s really important in this world.

Ah… the Police.  They never do anything, do they?  You know, a few weeks ago I filed a detailed report about how I had been kidnapped by five young blonde lesbians and they put a collar and chain on me, then dressed me in a frilly maid’s dress and made me lick their boots clean, while they kissed and cuddled each other wearing various latex and leather outfits – and do you know what? The Police said they thought I’d made it all up!

No rush.  You’re not going anywhere.



Many men who’ve been on the course say it was a life-changing, eye-opening experience.  They’re all very, very grateful.

Not too much, mind.  Don’t want to make it too easy.


Goodwill to all women

It’s that very special time of year.  The holly and the ivy… both actually almost as unpleasant-tasting as all the pine needles I have to eat off the floor, but it’s a tradition and I can’t argue with that.


Nothing particularly Christmassy about today’s captions, though – just the usual rubbish.


I’m going to have a go at writing some snip-lit some day.  They say write what you know.


When we engage in medical roleply, my SO likes to use actual medicines.  She gets a friend who works in a hospital to give her stuff that they’re throwing out because it’s near its expiry date.  Says it makes it more realistic.  I don’t suppose there’s any harm in it.

My wife came multiple times on our wedding night, I’m told.



 

She read somewhere that husbands and wives should always agree on financial decisions, so she wanted to make sure he was OK with it first.






The video basically just consists of cut-scenes.  (Sorry, sometimes I can’t help myself)












Be cruel to thy neighbour

It does, actually.  But it was never very good at it, anyway, so no loss really.
Scurry scurry scurry.

She can track your progress with the little chip thing they insert under your skin. If she can be bothered.

Damn… she’s right.  Eight years I’ve been writing this blog and… oh well.
Thank goodness everyone’s safe.  Everyone who matters, anyway.