girls with guns – Page 2 – Contemplating the divine

Strictly enforced whims

C’mon, give it a chance. She wore the red dress for you, after all.

Don’t get the wrong idea: they take bullying very seriously. All the girls get three bullying classes every week (as do the boys and the male teachers, albeit in a different way), and most of them are in the after-school club too. They’re regional champions.

Actually, I’d have been able to tell Kurt was here even it wasn’t for the loud grunting noises – who else leaves a bag of dirty laundry waiting for me in the hall? One day, he’s going to go too far and he and I are going to have to have words. But not today: he’s a bit busy and that dinner won’t make itself.

Oh well, so much for that day out.

This could turn into a vicious spiral.

Women at arms

More dispatches from those heroines who fought and won World War M. They fought for freedom and oppression, for friendship and for cruelty, for their buddies and for the trophies but most of all they fought for that little girl back home who won’t ever have to grow up in a world without male slaves.

We shall not forget them.

Miss rule

I
usually find that my main thought during ‘thinking time’ is ‘I think I
can’t stand this much longer’ but my SO says it helps and I don’t like
to contradict her.

I think she’s over-reacting. First rule of army life: ‘stuff goes missing’, amiright?

That does sound fun. Don’t worry if you don’t get it the first time – you can have as many goes as you like, subject to any withdrawal limitations imposed by your bank (and you may want to try asking for those to be lifted, it’ll increase your chance of success).

They do other things too. But mainly that.

I think you’re about to make two lovely ladies very happy.

My goodness!

‘Readers’ of this blog might have picked up on the subtle hints I have ocasionally dropped here, that I might have a bit of a thing for Anne Hathaway (the living actress, not the dead wife of William Shakespeare, although I don’t doubt she was very lovely too). Very regular ‘readers’ will also be aware that earlier this year I posted a video of an interview with the divine Anne, in which she had to speak quite firmly to the young male who had been privileged enough to be allowed into her presence to interview her. I have to confess I found that firmness somewhat… stimulating. Obsessive ‘readers’ might even have noticed that I then developed something of a compulsion to publish a series of captioned images all with exactly the same caption, whenever the facial expression or the situation seemed to warrant it.

At the risk of alienating what few ‘readers’ I have left, I am afraid to have to tell you that the compulsion is still with me, so more of the same – exactly the same – below. Sorry about that. This is an extra post, though, so it will not diminish the twice-weekly postings of captioned images that don’t all have exactly the same words (just the same tired old set of ideas and jokes).

So… as is traditional, we’ll start with the original, then repeat the same theme ad infinitum (where ‘infinitum’ is here understood to mean ‘seven times’).

Service oriented

Once again, it is time for this blog to salute the heroines of World War M. They fought for freedom – and slavery as well, obviously. Honour them, remember them. They served so that we can have a long and happy future of service, too.

If you liked these (and if you didn’t, why are you still here – are you one of those weird masochists, or something?), you might also like this. And if you’re from a really small country with a tiny, insignificant little army, you might also want to consider declaring war on the Netherlands.

Her whip, her rules

She could well be right. Early on in our relationship, my SO visited a therapist who told her to try dealing with her feelings frustration by beating the living daylights out of me. Worked.

You get health benefits too – mostly regular exercise and a healthy diet.

I guess we’re both disappointed about the whole situation.

That’s a museum ship, by the way: HMS Belfast. Worth a visit, if you’re in London, but the guns obviously can’t fire any more and all the seamen left a long time ago.

The lovely Mistress Sidonia, of course. Oddly enough, I understand she began her career as a submissive, but she has amply paid back the male sex in the years since.

My own car just stays locked in the garage all the time, these days. I don’t know why I bother to keep it, really.

Don’t worry her pretty little head about it

Because she really doesn’t care. Just suffer in silence, unless she prefers you to suffer noisily.

In case any readers are thinking of trying this, removal of male sexual organs should only ever be carried out under the supervision of a trained medical professional, OK? The shooting club from where the photo was taken always has a qualified paramedic on standby. So they can enjoy their sport, without any serious health risks.

Mmm…. You wanted a cruel and sexy findomme, right?

Anna’s always too soft on them. Look at all that puppy fat he’s put on too! Soon sort that out.

It’s funny how many men say they want their wives to take charge but as soon as they get thrown out naked and without a penny, start whining about how that wasn’t what they wanted.

The girls at my school used to play skipping games. In fact, my first proper beating was with a skipping rope doubled over and soaked in water. Happy days.

Back to reality

… well, the loose approximation of it represented by this blog, anyway.

The holiday, since you ask, was fantastic. It was in one of those picture-perfect resorts, you know, with the palm trees coming down to the powdery sand sloping down to a turquoise lagoon. But not at all crowded – it’s a private beach belonging to the hotel and at the prices I was paying, I can tell you, there’d just better be some serious privacy! And the hotel was as spectacular as the price implied: the rooms, the food, the pool… made a lot of new friends too, apparently.

What do you mean, ‘how do I know’? She sent me a postcard, of course. I mean, I didn’t actually see it until after my release because the kennels don’t allow postal deliveries, but I expect she didn’t know that and it was a very kind thought. She was having so much fun, she hadn’t even put enough postage on it, the silly thing! Had to come out of my pocket money. I’d been saving for.. well, I mustn’t complain.

Another year, another… maybe 550 or so captioned images? It hardly bears thinking about, does it? Better get on…

Stick-fetching is one of those things that sensible husbands quickly learn is not really up for discussion.

You know, I think she might be about to confess her life-long fantasy of making love to a short, slightly overweight guy wearing a frilly french maid outfit. Give her time.

It’s a shame they can’t both win.

Damn. That was going well.

It’s awful wearing a chastity belt on a beach – sands gets in, apparently. Not that I’d know. Sensible concrete floors, that’s what we had in the kennels. Fresh straw on Thursdays.

Penalty and repentance

They are – and not just the food. The sex will be longer, more satisfying and 100% female, too.

You get a special decoration too. Not a medal. Just… decoration.

Sometimes a question isn’t really a question.

It’s always difficult arriving as a substitute teacher, in the middle of the school year. But just do your best. Maybe Mr Harris will turn up again – he must be somewhere, after all.

Perpetuity is quite a long time. It might feel even longer.

You’ll always find me in the kitchen at parties

Happy relationships are all about boundaries. Many newly-married men get a bit silly about not being able to lead the batchelor life any more, but are you really any ‘less free’ just because from now on you can’t do or say anything your wife disapproves of? It’s just a different way of life, that’s all.

Rubbing up against a tree? Sounds a bit kinky.

She seems nice.

Yes, let’s.

What a lovely film that was. Especially the bath scene…