female-led relationships – Page 12 – Contemplating the divine

Controlling personality syndrome

It’s not a ‘disorder’, thank goodness.

It’s a remarkable experience, actually wanting your penis to be smaller all of a sudden.

Should be a lot of fun.

It’s kind of her to help him like that. Spreader gags can be so impersonal.

My pleasure.

Cometh the hour cometh the thithy

Good manners never hurt anyone

Bad manners, on the other hand, can you leave you sore for days.

See what I mean about good manners? He’s approaching the conversation in a polite, respectful way. I am sure she’ll give him a fair hearing and explain the reasons for her decision, in return.

Now this looks like an example of someone going all sulky and silly about things. She offered him a choice. She didn’t have to but she did. If he won’t respond graciously to that then… well, there will be consequences, let’s just say that and leave it there.

She’s very keen on good manners. Impossible girl.

See how fair they’re being? They’re going to calmly debate it and they’ll only keep on whipping him if it’s what the majority wants to do. I hope he’ll accept the decision graciously, even if it’s not what he wanted. Not that it affects anything, whether he accepts it or not, but it’s more polite.

My SO went to the Caribbean. – Jamaica?- No, of course not. I don’t get to tell her what to do – I’m her slave.

The imperative mood

“The imperative mood
(often referred to simply as a command) is used to express demands,
instructions or requests. We usually use the second person (plural or
singular) with an unspoken “you” for the subject.” sez Learnenglish. The ‘you’ is indeed unspoken, although sometimes She substitutes other words to refer to Her servitor.

The grammatically correct response to the imperative mood is the submissive mood.

Ludicrous, unrealistic fantasy. Who’d pay $2500 for a male?

What’s that? You’re guessing ‘mandatory gender sensitivity training’? Well, sure, maybe that too, that too.

I don’t see the point of these fancy electronic monitoring systems. A sturdy 20-foot length of chain has always done the trick in our (actually Her) household.

Here’s a clue: whoever it was lifted the seat. So it won’t be Raoul for a start: he never does,

Marital law

I know how to satisfy my wife sexually. I just have to hire some help to do it in practice.

Depends what you define as a problem. There’s obviously going to be a lot of screaming, for a start, and – what’s that you say? She doesn’t mind the screaming? Oh, OK then. No, I don’t think there’s going to be any kind of problem.

Of course, she doesn’t regard him as being on the same level as all her appliances. She’s a lot closer to her vibrator, for a start.

You should keep the little teensie condoms around, though. You might get lucky, after all! How many have you got left? Three? Oh yes, that should be more than enough. The honeymoon only lasts two weeks, after all.

Aunt Clarissa’s used to slightly looser men, of course. I mean, Uncle Arnold hasn’t spent a day without a butt-plug since the 1960s, I understand.

Pink? Pink? Well, what’s wrong with pink?

Seems like you got a pink kink in your think!

Thank goodness I’m not going to be the only one there in pink, anyway.

I only went for the make-up tips anyway.

Ah – the rolling pin! Just in that sweet spot between loving domestic discipline and cranial fracture.

Time to come out and play!

Nor are there many rhymes for “penectomy”. I mean, you can just about work something in with “respect for me” but it’s a bit contrived, don’t you think? And we don’t like to have excessively contrived notions here on Contemplating the Divine, as you probably know.

Compliance training

He’ll do OK on personal appearance too. He looks like a cringing, terrified little worm, which is exactly how she likes it.

Don’t you just hate it when the dates of your personal appraisals at home and at work coincide?

Don’t worry, the HR people will deal with this sensitive matter appropriately, too. Perhaps you ought to drop round, thank them for resolving the matter so speedily? They’re the unsung heroines of the workplace, in my view.

Chemical castration – some say it’s a valid alternative to physical castration, but I say why not try both?

Don’t worry – I don’t mean actual ‘bears’! No bestiality in this blog, thank you very much! No, the caption is suggesting a scene in which this lady is renting out her – husband, boyfriend, stepfather, slave? – to anyone who calls and on this occasion it’s going to be a group of big, hypermasculine male hairy biker types. He is presumptively heterosexual by inclination, so the implication is that she is lying, exhibiting gratuitous cruelty to her insignificant other. OK? There – now you can enjoy the caption. Anyone confused by any of the captions in this blog is recommended to read the template post, available here.

Impertinence

Well, that doesn’t seem very fair. I mean, does Andrew have to ask my permission when he comes in and puts his big muddy boots up on my nice clean chairs? I think not.

And for you.

Mmm… sissy maid play. Sheer erotic indulgence, every day from 6am right through to bedtime. Hope there’s gruel.

Actually he has a surprise for her. You know those shoes she threw out into the dumpster and thought she’d never see again? Well…

Meek and feeble

He’s made a lifetime commitment.

My SO always says a bit of bruising on a man’s face can be quite attractive, anyway.

Actually, the market is a bit limited as sissy husbands tend not to have much time for reading, or a lot of pocket money.

It’s all a bit academic (if you’ll pardon the pun), actually, because the school moved four years ago and there isn’t actually a Staircase B any more. Still, that’s no excuse for not memorising the rule properly, is it, boy?

I think the correct response is “Mmmmphh!”

Little man you’ve had a busy day

… so it’s time for a spanking, then all tucked up for an early night with hands secured in your special mittens. Don’t worry about wifey – she’ll find something to amuse herself with.

You’ll probably also find that you prefer not to watch sport on TV and you love going to bed early. In fact, you’re going to discover a lot of things about the real you. Isn’t that nice?

I used to worry that women would discover I’m really rubbish in bed. But so far, as luck would have it, the situation just hasn’t arisen, so that’s OK.

There are probably a few things bothering him just at the moment. And there’ll be a few more, quite soon afterwards, I expect.

It’s nice they can sing while they’re working. I mean, having to end another human’s life, it’s a serious and depressing business, isn’t it? Good for them – keeping their spirits up like that.

Ah.. now that takes me back. I remember the very first face-slap of my married life. It was about – oooh, seven seconds after the last face-slap of my unmarried life, as I recall.