dominant wife – Page 16 – Contemplating the divine

You know I work all day to get you money to buy you things

They still holiday in the same place, and go down to the lake to the pier and occasionally she pushes him in for old times’ sake. It’s not always at the same time of year but it still has the same magic. Last February the ice was so thick it didn’t break when he fell on it – so much for global warming, huh?

Some men find it annoying and restrictive having to wear a shock collar, but really – it’s ten minutes sitting plugged in by the wall most days… maybe 15 minutes at most after a lot of use? Then you’re fully charged and can get on with your life in whatever way takes her fancy. It just takes a little planning that’s all.

Many men get excited at the thought of watching passionate lesbian sex, but believe me after a few years you kinda start to feel a bit jealous? Silly, I know…

Apparently
she’s having the schoolroom fitted out already. If she’s not even
pregnant yet, I have to say that seems a little premature.

As I’ve always said: there’s no job a woman can do that a man can’t do too. Just more slowly, not as well and with someone of a superior gender in charge to make sure he doesn’t fuck it up. Which, admittedly, doesn’t work too well when flying a plane. But Billy can have his dreams – then he’ll grow up, meet a nice girl who’ll sweep him off his feet and he’ll settle down as a happy househusband, I expect.

Dommesticated

Bliss. Link is, just for once, actually to something femdom-themed rather than random British music. Really , honestly. No, it’s not Rick Astley. I promise. Really – try it. It’s a very sweet and sexy thing.*

I tried one of those virtual girlfriend programmes. Something went wrong, though – after the first time I’d tried it, every time I started it up, the computer would just crash and shut down. I thought it must be a bug so I called the helpline but the lady there just laughed and said she thought there was nothing wrong with the software and she put the phone down on me and blocked my number. Computer-generated personalities can be startlingly lifelike these days, don’t you think?

Well, let’s hope she doesn’t just fall asleep as soon as she’s had her orgasm, this time.

Actually, most of my clothes these days are washable latex anyway. The blood just rinses right off, so no harm done.

Fortunately, when you get near your own neighbourhood most people will already know that.

Even Hollywood megastars have to pay for some things themselves, huh? Still… I expect she can afford it.

* PS You thought it was going to be Rick Astley, didn’t you? Don’t you trust me? Just admit it – you don’t trust me, do you? Trust’s important in BDSM. I’m hurt now… and not in a good way.

Infemmey

They’ve all got it… oh never mind.

I
get reward points for spending on my SubbieCard. Every time I reach a
certain threshold – a multiple of £20, actually so it’s almost every
week – I get to drop into the bank and get slapped hard across the face.

I, on the other hand, fervently hope that she’s going to behave exactly like this when we’re married.

The time’s not wasted when it’s helping the marriage to work.

Goodness, that sounds quite scary. What a good thing there are so many competent women looking after it.

It’s a jungle out there. Much better off safe and sound behind bars.

A pretty face may be enough to catch a man, but it takes character and good nature to hold him.

The title quote, of course, is from Sir Thomas More’s Utopia. But you knew that, right? You’re an educated, sophisticated man of the world, who knows that the capital of Gabon is Libreville, can calculate complex sums quickly and accurately and understands the main principles of the annealing process in glass manufacture. You just pretend to be an ignorant schoolboy who doesn’t even know that the capital of Australia is Sydney.*

Apparently, I have ‘kick-me testicles’. I never even knew that was a thing, but there you go.

Actually, I get quite a lot of normal healthy sex in my current relationship – maybe a bit rough, but really just your basic penetrative sex, fellatio… that kind of thing. Several of Her favourite boyfriends are bisexual, so I get a lot of action. I have to say, I prefer perversion, on balance.

And ‘cum-bucket’ isn’t even a word, so in a sense the question of spelling doesn’t even arise.

Her bedroom wall is covered with hunting trophies.

It is, right? I mean, better than nothing. You’re enjoying yourself, yeah? I’m afraid this is the last caption today, so you’d better finish now.. that’s right. Up and down, up and down. Tugtugtug? A bit more – there! Excellent. And… just get the last out, there… great. See you on Friday!

* Yes, I know. It’s a joke. If you don’t get it, maybe it’s my fault for being too obscure. Or if you’re a humiliation slut**, maybe it’s your fault for being such a moron, hmm? Too stupid to actually wank and think at the same time, are we? Gosh… a small cock and a tiny intellect – didn’t exactly win the first prize in life, did you? Try one of those blogs featured on Tiresome Tropes, instead, lamebrain, maybe it’s more your level.

** If you’re not a humiliation slut, I don’t recommend reading the rest of the comment above.

Servile bodies

Whoops – I appear to have scheduled two posts to appear on the same day. Oh well, too late to change it now. Scroll down for another post immediately under this here one and marvel at how samey it all is, when experienced in bulk.

No indeed. He doesn’t have to have a happy marriage for it to be a successful one in all the ways that matter.

Don’t forget to ask when you can see her again.

It’s his own fault. He should have told her he’s afraid of heights. Sorry – what’s that? He did tell her? Oh. Well, it must be his own fault for some other reason then.

Supposedly you can gain confidence as a speaker by imagining your audience naked. Worth a try.

She doesn’t like to bring her work home. Occasionally, a few fingernails or other bits get stuck to her boots, but that’s about it.

Denagratrix

Thank goodness for modern anaesthetics

Speaking of modern anaesthetics, for those of you into extreme femdom violence, torture and castration, here’s a sweet little move clip I found.

I’m encouraged already, actually.

…and if I do?

You can download an app that’ll translate any length of text into morse code. She discovered that the next day…

The annual performance reviews can be a bit brutal.

Herarchy

And when she’s sure she makes sure you’re sure.

Giving until it hurts.

He is now.

Well, I hate being whipped, so I can see a difference of opinion there that won’t be easy to resolve. Still, better not tell her. It’ll only make her cross.

They’re already planning a sequel. With different male lead characters, obviously.

Since you made it all the way down here (try to work more quickly next time, OK? My Blogger stats show that most readers reach orgasm by the third caption so there’s really no excuse for needing all five) here’s a little extra.

The Portly Polar Pinniped has the best collection of ‘mainstream’ video clips I have ever seen. Many of them very much themed along the ‘women’s world’ that this blog so often celebrates. He must be a busy little aquatic mammal and you’ll want to check out both his uploaded videos and his playlists.

There’s too many to single out all my favourites. But check out this playlist. It starts with the Charlie’s Angels clip you’ve probably seen, but press on as I’ll bet there’s good stuff here you haven’t. Especially this (rather reminiscent of the Two Ronnies Worm that Turned of blissful childhood memory). Oh: and definitely – def-in-ite-ly – this. And so much more.

Flap your flippers together in appreciation of the portly pinniped!

Matronising attitudes

Well, all right. As long as I get to have my say on the subject.

That’s fair.

It’s so hard to choose sometimes, isn’t it? Hmm… would I rather have a cock in my mouth or a turd? It’s so hard being submissive – I’ll bet other sexual perversions don’t end up causing such dilemmas.

It’s actually doubly unfair to set particularly hard questions to boys, because we’re stupider.

Hope she reads the instructions. Apparently, if you exceed the recommended dose, it can cause quite a lot of discomfort. I mean, more than the intended discomfort, obviously.

Domesticated bliss

Oh… now there was a reason. What on earth was it? Ermmm… let me think.

It’s her next project for the garden, after the sun deck is all done.

They say that dieting requires self-discipline, but I’ve never found I needed any.

Oh, humour her. Women can be silly about these things. An occasional waterboarding is a small price to pay for a harmonious mariage, hmm?

Nothing. Yet.

The other was me and I’m a boy

Never quite sure what The Who were complaining about in that song. Looks to me like an idyllic childhood.

You can earn free hair grips and stuff when you spend money too – pretty cool, huh?

She tries so hard… but usually fails.

That’s a bit unfair. I once told my SO that I could do any job a woman can do, so she arranged an internshp at a brothel, giving blow-jobs to oil rig workers on shore leave. To be honest, I wasn’t quite as good at it as the girls but I had plenty of clients once they priced me at a 95% discount.

Yeah, how about it Dave? Equal pay for equal work. Stand up for yourself and be a man, for once. Or ‘you go, girl!’. Whatever.

Our pillory’s my special place. I can spend hours at a time in there, not really doing anything in particular, you know?