brutality – Page 8 – Contemplating the divine

Sexual veneration

I have quite a few tattoos – my SO says it gives her a feeling of ownership. Mostly shopping lists or phone numbers.

Still, she’s wearing a proper medical outfit, so you know you’re safe in professional hands.

Poor Andy. Bet he felt humiliated!

I’m quite good at scrabble. I’m rubbish at blow jobs, though… everyone says so.

Looks like someone has forgotten the virtues of kindness! Honestly, saying such hurtful about Felicity; it’s hardly in the spirit of charity and forgiveness that the Order prescribes, is it?

She’s my lady…

…I’m her boy.

No, just need a lamp-post to raise my leg against some time soon, that’s all. No rush.

A range of sizes – but all boyfriend-sized, not you-sized, yeah? Mike’s friends will be real guys.

Actually, it’s extremely good practice because they don’t usually bother to fill the pool with water.

How very kind of her.

She should make sure she gets his consent first, though. Or during – whatever’s easiest.

You make my heart sing

You make everything… groovy baby.

Actually, most such limits turn out to be soft and squidgy, when tested vigorously.

Why do all my dates end up like this? Maybe it’s the poetry…

Actually, I think the whole idea of young women putting their torture skills on display like this is a bit offensive. But no one cares what I think. Even me, oddly.

I think the experience might bring you closer. So will that hasp, when she attaches it to your collar.

There’s an amusing additional caption down here. Hello? Down here…amusing caption? Oh, I don’t know why I bother…

You’ll always find me in the kitchen at parties

Happy relationships are all about boundaries. Many newly-married men get a bit silly about not being able to lead the batchelor life any more, but are you really any ‘less free’ just because from now on you can’t do or say anything your wife disapproves of? It’s just a different way of life, that’s all.

Rubbing up against a tree? Sounds a bit kinky.

She seems nice.

Yes, let’s.

What a lovely film that was. Especially the bath scene…

Tears before, during and after bedtime

It’s actually quite high in calories, but don’t worry about that because you’re unlikely to be able to keep much of it down.

Thank goodness for that. I think you can just leave the case in her capable hands.

I dunno – I find shops vary in the degree to which they are kink-friendly. Once I was sent to find some gear for an adult baby session and for some reason the staff in the ‘early years’ shop got all weird about it when I started asking about how strong their leather reins sets were, and whether the cots could be fitted with padlocks. But then on another occasion, I had to buy a hairbrush and the shop assistant in the department store I went to was delighted to help me try every one of them out. Said it was something she wished she could do to more customers. So you never know.

Silly boys. Reinforced seat trousers do little good when they’re around your ankles, anyway.

Male brains don’t multi-task. Mine barely tasks at all, to be honest. Now then: I was writing a caption..?

I’m going to be, what she wants me to be

My girl (2 – the one with the sexier video – from the 1969 movie Sweet Charity).

I’ve always been a sucker for a ‘dominatrix ponytail’ – and there are a lot more of them in this clip from the original movie.

Sounds like the perfect evening to me. I think there might even be half a packet of Hob-nobs left.

She can be very reasonable. Also, surprisingly unreasonable. But that’s married life.

Serious stuff: Marcia’s job’s on the line here. I’ll keep you posted if there are any developments.

He’s moved on. Why can’t she?

There: the science has proved it. ‘Men are almost as fully human as women’. I shall have to make sure my SO reads this. Perhaps she’ll start treating me as a near-equal.

Fail better

I do that. I’m really good at failing, actually.

A bit of a shame to call in sick – the girls at work recognised you and have something special planned, whenever you’re next in the office.

Marriage is always a learning experience. She’s just determined to make the learning experience a bit more structured, that’s all.

I’ve always tried to use humour to defuse tense situations. On my very first… time with a woman, if you know what I mean, I was very nervous indeed. Fortunately she burst out laughing as soon as I’d taken my clothes off, and she was still giggling when her taxi arrived ten minutes later. I’ve always been able to make women laugh: it’s a gift.

I suppose that must mean she has a basement too – they’re all the same, the houses on that row. I wonder what she keeps down there?

Funnily enough, it turns out Prop 677 wasn’t even necessary. Enough Californians worship Anne as a goddess for her to qualify for the religious exemption, so she didn’t have to pay taxes anyway. Still: it was a nice gesture.

Deeply indebted to her

…but she sometimes lets me off the monthly interest if I consent to one of the ‘special’ games she likes to play. It’s quite an incentive to keep the payments up, actually.

Don’t worry about a thing. I’ve heard you can see the sea from the bar they’re planning to spend the afternoon in, so I’m sure they’ll notice if the tide comes a bit further up than they were expecting.

Hmmm… it’s almost like they’re in a – what’s the word? Predicament.

What can it mean? I don’t know… I just work here.

Consent is very important in BDSM. My SO absolutely insists on it.

Ah well. Nearly got a freebie there. You know… I was playing SPH humiliation scenes years before I knew that was a thing. I just called it ‘dating’.

I’ll get some nuts

Is this femdom? Works for me. But then, like at least 80% of the male British population, I adore Olivia Coleman.

But I’ve only got one – after that thing with Angie last week. Oh… go on then.

It’s actually a grotesque stereotype that gay men molest straight men in public lavatories. Also, most gay men aren’t attracted to guys in little maids’ dresses. So: you’re safe on two counts. But you can have the butt-plug if you want to be sure. Or if she decides it might look funny.

You need to be careful online, though. My SO once took up what She thought was an offer of a fit young 22 year-old guy and She found Herself the owner of this rather unattractive 52 year-old. She was quite cross with him for lying like that, so of course when She later tried to get rid of him , he was badly damaged and She ended up having to send him to landfill. I’m not saying people shouldn’t sell themselves into slavery online, obviously, but they need to take some care, that’s all.

That’ll be two us without a choice in the matter, then. I wonder who does decide these things?

There’s nothing so relaxing as knowing you can scream and thrash hysterically in fear and pain as much as you like. Time to hand over control.

Dommesticated

Bliss. Link is, just for once, actually to something femdom-themed rather than random British music. Really , honestly. No, it’s not Rick Astley. I promise. Really – try it. It’s a very sweet and sexy thing.*

I tried one of those virtual girlfriend programmes. Something went wrong, though – after the first time I’d tried it, every time I started it up, the computer would just crash and shut down. I thought it must be a bug so I called the helpline but the lady there just laughed and said she thought there was nothing wrong with the software and she put the phone down on me and blocked my number. Computer-generated personalities can be startlingly lifelike these days, don’t you think?

Well, let’s hope she doesn’t just fall asleep as soon as she’s had her orgasm, this time.

Actually, most of my clothes these days are washable latex anyway. The blood just rinses right off, so no harm done.

Fortunately, when you get near your own neighbourhood most people will already know that.

Even Hollywood megastars have to pay for some things themselves, huh? Still… I expect she can afford it.

* PS You thought it was going to be Rick Astley, didn’t you? Don’t you trust me? Just admit it – you don’t trust me, do you? Trust’s important in BDSM. I’m hurt now… and not in a good way.