breathplay – Contemplating the divine

Boxing stupid

Yes, it’s Boxing Day. A day I have come to realise is culturally specific to the UK and a few other places that are a bit like the UK, but not as damp and with fewer bat-tunnels. It’s one of those phrases that non-British people often fail to understand, like ‘having a fag in the back alley’ (you can also be a fag, for an older boy at boarding school, of course); or making sure ‘your child always has a rubber in his schoolbag’, as the teachers don’t provide them, or ‘letting some woman piss in your ring-gagged mouth’, which is just an idiomatic way of saying you’ll take her advice (“Oh, I don’t know which movie to go and see, darling: just ring-gag my jaw wide open and you can piss in my mouth, OK?”)*

Anyway, traditionally a day for tidying up after the excesses of the day before, although some people are more active: many hunts go out on Boxing Day, for example, with whips cracking and horns blaring as they pursure their terrified quarry across the fields, and some hardy souls even have a tradition of jumping naked into the sea, here in Britain on one of the coldest days of the year. My SO has very thoughtfully signed me up for all three of these festive activities, so I’ve no time for a themed post, just the usual dross.

Forget Kurt. Well… don’t forget him, obviously: he still needs his laundy done and his appartment cleaned. But the important thing is that your chastity regime should be right for *you* and that’s what she’s focused on.

Wow, tough situation! Thank goodness she’s there for him.

Looks like babe brought a pineapple, though, and I’m sure there are some bits of that that could be put to good use.

She was a little disappointed that Dr Taylor insisted on anesthetising you for the procedure, but there’ll be plenty of time later, when you’ll have the feeling restored in all of the bits of your body that remain attached.

I booked a ‘mean date’ session with a sex worker and she didn’t even show up! Wonderful. It’s so rare for someone just to ‘get me’ like that.

Some men find it hard to adapt to a female supremacist work environment, but it’s actually very straightforward as long as you just follow a few simple rules – or a lot of complicated rules, if that’s what she prefers.

* All right, I made that last one up. I make a lot of stuff up, here. But you should try it, I mean you never know, right? And there are never any good movies around, just after Christmas, so it’s good to find alternative ways of entertaining yourselves.

Now, please, darling

Sometimes Lisa quite likes dealing with the easier cases who break almost immediately, for a change: it gives her a chance to explore some techniques without any pressure. Plus, she enjoys the terrified pleading and screaming.

They’re thinking of making it a compulsory module, so most nurses will have had at least some experience of castrating males. Although they never had any lack of volunteers when it was optional.

Oh, I don’t know. One of my SO’s boyfriends gave me a contempt fuck one day and it was quite memorable.

Or breathe in to hang around abit longer – up to you. She’d rather get on with it, but just this once I think she might let you choose.

It’s obviously been bothering her a lot, poor thing.

Opinionated

The ‘any more’ is a bit of a stretch too, to be perfectly honest.

Safety first is the golden rule in a hard whipping scene of course: always remember to thank your domme politely or it can get quite nasty.

Nice to be the centre of attention for once, I suppose.

To be fair, I don’t actually known whether I’d be bad at sex or not, but as my SO so wisely says: why risk it?

Don’t worry: the safety-first rule applies here too. She’ll make sure she puts the chain on the door and looks out through the spyhole before opening the door to a stranger, don’t you worry.

Shocking untruths

Communication is at the heart of a healthy relationship, especially if it’s all in one direction.

Always bring a sissy when you’re dogging. It’s nicer for the guys as well, if they fancy swinging both ways. Or just hitting someone.

Don’t worry: that doctor won’t lie on an official medical form, just because she asks him to. Only if Lucy asks. He’s hers, you see.

She’s free and single and yet you’re neither. But who said life had to be fair?

I’ve half a mind to complain.

Rigorously unfair

Yes, just imagine. Still, no harm done to anyone who matters on this occasion, thank goodness.

Maybe if you wipe around the rim it won’t look so bad and Cathie won’t be cross… oh, who am I kidding?

You already ‘dared’ when you turned up for the session. Now for a few truths.

I’m afraid she’s just willfully denying reality, there. Phish Food is much better.

Or spoken, known about or even defined. Don’t worry, you’ll soon get the hang of it.

Permissive society

Contrary to what many people ill-informed about femdom relationships might imagine, I am not oppressed by my SO, in fact she actually makes a point of bestowing small freedoms on me. For example, she grants me a financial allowance out of my earnings, quite frequently permits me to speak as long as that privilege is not abused and even (speaking of abuse) permits occasional sexual release. I’m very lucky that way, as I often find myself compelled to tell her.

Like many submissive men, I find arguing with my SO can make me feel quite uncomfortable – sometimes immediately, sometimes over an extended period of time.

It’s the dreading that’s the worst part, I understand.

Whatevs.

Teasing and denial.

It’s the little things in a relationship that really define it.

Lip service

There are lots of things submissives know about that ‘ordinary people’ don’t. It’s an odd thought, but most people have never been peed on, for instance (by an adult, anyway).

Oh, well if David wants me serving canapes then of course we’d better go! Sigh. David this, David that… honestly, one day I’m really going to have to set some boundaries in this relationship. But not today. What do you think? I favour the one on the left…

She said stare at the ground, moron.

Erm… yeah, the ironing. About that…

Brain damage play can be a lot of fun, but you need to make sure you pick short and simple words to use as safewords.

Service orientation

My SO’s always had the same rule. Sulky face = semen face. Simple, no argument.

Or breakfast, if you’re not hungry enough by tonight.

I’d end up paying a lot of guys for a lot of things, if that rule applied to me. It’s important to prioritise: to spend your money on the things that make her most happy.

Many people who get into porn movies just do it for a short time, but snuff movie stars, oddly enough, often spend the rest of their lives in the business.

My first girlfriend told me she was strongly opposed to corporal punishment of children. When I turned eighteen, I discovered she had strong views on the corporal punishment of adults, too.

Makes your feet and fingers glow

No, not that. (Warning: SFW)

This.

I don’t bother too much about fashion myself. Life’s easier when all you wear is a steel collar. I’m never out of style because I’m never allowed out.

Practice makes perfect. Next!

Many brides encounter disappointment on their wedding nights. She just needs to make the best of it and move on, I reckon.

Married couples should try to share one another’s interests. It’s about making an effort: an act of the will. Sure, he’s not so interested in cock, but maybe he could just bend from time to time, hmm? Is it so hard?

I went to see Justice League. I’ve got to say, I have mixed feelings about it. Maybe… oh I don’t know… 20% of the movie is really great but the other 80% was just meh for me. There was some really shoddy camerawork too – like on several occasions, you could clearly see actors in shot, speaking lines and stuff like that, and blocking the view of Gal? That’s just unprofessional.

The wrongs of man

are self-evident but can be sorted out by the smack of firm government in the right hands.

She sounds like she knows what she’s doing.

Another day, another dollar. Well… not a whole dollar, obviously. That’s just a saying. In fact, they only spend a penny each time.

Huh! I’d like to see him do better.

Maybe try another topic of conversation? I mean – you got her attention. That’s a good start.

See, there he is while she’s telling him how upset she was about his thoughtless gift and all he can think about is how his lungs are burning. That’s what men are like. It’s a good thing there’s femdom to help set us right, that’s all I can say.