Category: too small to satisfy anyone

Service orientation



My SO’s always had the same rule.  Sulky face = semen face.  Simple, no argument.


Or breakfast, if you’re not hungry enough by tonight.
I’d end up paying a lot of guys for a lot of things, if that rule applied to me.  It’s important to prioritise: to spend your money on the things that make her most happy.

Many people who get into porn movies just do it for a short time, but snuff movie stars, oddly enough, often spend the rest of their lives in the business.

My first girlfriend told me she was strongly opposed to corporal punishment of children.  When I turned eighteen, I discovered she had strong views on the corporal punishment of adults, too.


Lachrymatrices



The annoying thing is, I only bought the car last week. But I guess I can do without it.  It’s essential to prioritise, when making important financial decisions.
She doesn’t mean the bondage. He likes the bondage.  It’s the things she can do to him because he is in bondage that he won’t like.

There used to be a brand of condoms that fitted me just perfectly, but the manufacturer decided to stop producing that particular size.  Not enough demand for it, apparently.  Over 20% of men are that size or less, but they make up only 0.3% of all sexual encounters, so… I can’t really blame them.

And she’ll decide whether you really really need it, or not.
My wife’s very sexually demanding too, but I don’t have too much difficulty keeping her satisfied: the local male escort agencies all give us loyalty discounts now and if I book in advance as well, I can get up to a 25% off the list price. Which is – just about – affordable on my salary, if I’m careful to economise on everything else.


Hurtful thoughts

I think writing lines is a ridiculous and pointless, tedious activity and there are few things I hate doing more than writing lines for hours at her command.  I told her that just the other day.  500 times, in fact.

I did an interview once. Check it out if you want to find out about the real Servitor, behind the leather mask.  Don’t read it if the thought of knowing the real Servitor makes you nauseous.
Ooh – looks like there might be a consciousness-raising session coming on!

There wasn’t much to begin with.
I often have ‘plenty to complain about’.  Regretably, I’m not allowed so it all goes to waste.


Deeply indebted to her

…but she sometimes lets me off the monthly interest if I consent to one of the ‘special’ games she likes to play.  It’s quite an incentive to keep the payments up, actually.

Don’t worry about a thing. I’ve heard you can see the sea from the bar they’re planning to spend the afternoon in, so I’m sure they’ll notice if the tide comes a bit further up than they were expecting.


Hmmm… it’s almost like they’re in a – what’s the word?  Predicament.

What can it mean?  I don’t know… I just work here.
Consent is very important in BDSM.  My SO absolutely insists on it.

Ah well.  Nearly got a freebie there.  You know… I was playing SPH humiliation scenes years before I knew that was a thing.  I just called it ‘dating’.







Despite all the amputations

… you know Her life was saved by rock and roll?


He’s already made his wish. In fact, he’s still fervently making it.  But it’s not going to come true.
 The wonderful, lovely, powerful, stunning, brilliant and creative Mistress Eleise.  And Someone else I don’t know but will be happy to credit.

Obviously.

That’s just silly.  You can’t hypnotise someone into doing something they really don’t want to do.  So you’ll be fine. As long as she doesn’t actually want to do it. Yeah.


I hope he wears a crisp white uniform.











She really enjoys her job.  She meets people from all walks of life… gets to torture them… the look of terror on the faces of those who’ve experienced her treatments before makes it all worth while, you know?



For who would bear the whips and scorns?

I once checked on a date-rating site after an evening with a very lovely lady and discovered she’d rated me lower than her vibrator.  Which I wouldn’t mind so much, if that was the rating for sex but that was under ‘personality’.
She’s an expert negotiator.
Warning: the value of investment bankers can go down as well as up.
There’s also ‘maidspreading’.  That’s when you stand with your legs held firmly apart with a spreader bar. It’s usually a precursor to something rather painful.
You’d think they’d have guessed from the spreader gag.


Subjugatrices




Goodness, no. Once would quite enough – look at that horrible thing!  You know, I’ve been resisting my SO’s demands to let Her act out Her castration fantasy for years but She just went on and on about it and I finally said yes.  But I was very firm. Once – just once, and then we’re not going to hear anything more about it, OK? So… that’s done.






Dog food looks awfully fatty but actually you can lose weight quite effectively on a diet of nothing else – particularly if you have difficulty keeping it down.


She’s been showing her love for you with various men for a while now, actually.  This just makes it official.

She makes a very valid point, there. I think you might have to agree with her. Always.

And right now Mistress would like to get the clients safely locked away, take off that ridiculous and uncomfortable clothing and put her feet up with a mug of hot chocolate for an evening in front of the TV, thank you very much.  So in you go.


Scornography


Submissive husbands sometimes don’t realise how embarassing it must be for their partners to be married to such hopeless, pathetic losers.





She’s definitely one of those teachers that students will remember all their lives.

Another lady who takes pride in her work.  They say pride is a sin but I’m pretty sure that’s not supposed to include women.
As if she didn’t have one packed for the honeymoon already.

Sure, no rush. Pain’s pain, at any time.


Servile bodies

Whoops – I appear to have scheduled two posts to appear on the same day.  Oh well, too late to change it now.  Scroll down for another post immediately under this here one and marvel at how samey it all is, when experienced in bulk.






No indeed. He doesn’t have to have a happy marriage for it to be a successful one in all the ways that matter.







Don’t forget to ask when you can see her again.

It’s his own fault.  He should have told her he’s afraid of heights.  Sorry – what’s that? He did tell her?  Oh. Well, it must be his own fault for some other reason then.



Supposedly you can gain confidence as a speaker by imagining your audience naked. Worth a try.

She doesn’t like to bring her work home. Occasionally, a few fingernails or other bits get stuck to her boots, but that’s about it.


True love’s first slap

It’s a very special moment.

A lot of people don’t like the way St*rb*cks barristas ask for your name, now.  But I have a lot of fun with it. When it’s a young goddess, like this one, I get to be called “maggot” and “small-dick loser” for a fraction of the cost of even online humiliatrices, let alone a live session.  I don’t do it when it’s a man of course – except this one time, when they changed after taking my order and this 20 year-old guy called me “cumfaced pervert”?  That was kind of edgy, for me.






Not after having written them all out two hundred times, no.
This is Goddess Sophia, yet another lovely lady who has has the extreme misfortune to step into the puddle of slime that is Servitor in person and have to scrape him off the soles of her shoes.




It’s best to mark your possessions – or better yet, tag them with an RFID chip.


I wouldn’t have got myself into this mess, if playing cards made some kind of sense. Queens are lower than kings and aces?? How is anyone supposed to remember that?

 


Actually, it was the lipstick.