Category: shoes

Power and glory

For ever and ever…

The star jumps are the worst part.
Oi – don’t you know it’s rude to listen in on other people’s phone calls? It’s the taste of her shoes you’re paying for, not her private life.
It would have been a messy divorce. This solution is much neater.
Cum is actually quite healthy – very low fat. Just ask anyone who’s had to try to survive on a diet of nothing else.
Oh well, it’ll make a refreshing change to stand in a different corner afterwards.
My own wedding night was exhausting, I have to confess. 60 guests can leave a lot of mess.

Captive audience

Or one that would like to be so.

It just goes to show what I always say: that few marital problems can be resolved satisfactorily by cowering away in terror in a cupboard hoping she doesn’t find you.
Don’t worry: nobody’s expecting you to do anything much. They’ll do all the work, just leave it to them.
Probably just a breath mint. My SO receives monthly deliveries of a particularly effective brand of breath mints, with some long and complicated scientific name, from Myanmar. I’ve been taking one a day since soon after we got married and it’s never done me any harm, unlike many other things in our marriage.

Of course, there’s no need to discuss her expectations about you. Those are minimal, at best.

This is the fabulously beautiful and no doubt all-round fabulously fabulous Lady Perse, well worth visiting if you are in Warsaw or even if you are not. Needless to say (but I am conscious most of my readers are male, so even the blindingly obvious may need pointing out), the caption I have put on her divine image in no way represents her actual session practices, which I am sure are safe, sane, consensual and fabulous.

‘Something’? What kind of something? Why are the ladies in these captions so maddeningly unclear?

Bending to her will

Let’s hope Julie’s not still upset about that bad performance review.  Sometimes feedback can be unpleasant and hard to take – but it just has to be accepted. I hope she understands that.
Remember you’re an individual: you’re not defined entirely by what’s written on your collar.
Ah, teenage masturbation!  Goodness, that seems so long ago now.  How lucky I am that my SO has put all that well and truly behind me.
The boots are a lot tastier than the airline food.
The female orgasm can be a mysterious – and very painful – thing.

Securely married

Impressive she became so good at it, if she was a late developer.

 

 

She’s just trying to build trust.

 

 

Some restaurants just do that automatically, but I always think that doesn’t show enough respect for the owners.  The lady might not want her gimp to stop being thirsty just yet. Admittedly, she can always just keep the mouth zipped, but it’s the principle of it.

 

It can be difficult.  I often feel a bit let down when I’ve paid for a humiliation session and the domme doesn’t tell me anything I haven’t been told by almost every woman I’ve ever met.  It’s not the dommes’ fault, poor things, I know they do their best.


 

She can be forgetful. Like that time she spent almost ten minutes trying to change the TV channel with his electric shock control. Good thing he was gagged or he’d have screamed the place down, because she was trying for Channel 84 – it has this rather good flower arranging competition; like Bake Off but for flowers.  Sounds a bit dull but she likes it.  She was ever so cross when she realised what a silly thing she’d done that caused her to miss the first ten minutes.

 

 

 

 

 

Lap dogs to a slip of a girl

It’s funny: in a few weeks he’ll probably be complaining it’s too hot, staked out there on a lovely summer day with the honey and sweat running off his skin and the ants tickling his face.

 

 
 

 

I tried a self-help book once.  Apparently my feelings of inadequacy aren’t real.  Oh right – so what have I been paying all that tribute for, over the years, then?  Silly book.
Good thing she decided not to wash her hair, as she hates saying no to people.

 

 

A survey of the male employees found 82% of them consider the new dress code unbearably humiliating.  Management are working hard to think of something they can do to respond: 18% of males not feeling constantly mortified is simply unacceptable in a truly inclusive workplace.

 

 

Just don’t leave your used jodhpurs lying around.

Careless talk

Time for a chivalrous gesture.

 

 

 

No regrets. What you never have, you cannot lose.

 

 

 

Oh dear.  Let’s hope he’s not too rough with her.

 

 

 

Only a few.  She has more.

Many stepdaughters find the arrival of a new parent uncomfortable.  Looks like she’s found a way to deal with that discomfort; indeed transfer it to you.

 

 

 

Yanking my chain

Don’t you hate it when she does that?


Nah, same old. Just got a new hood that’s all – and some fresh whip-marks.




Models have something of a reputation for aggressive behaviour, which is often quite undeserved, sad to say. 




To be honest, if I had to choose my perversion, there are probably easier options than being submissive.  But fortunately I cannot choose and as a submissive I’d rather not anyway.





Many brides can be a bit on edge during the big day – the whole ‘bridezilla’ thing, you know?  Just humour her… soon you’ll have tied the knot and can settle down to a lifetime of married bliss.






Hmm.  Seems a bit unprofessional, to have mixed up the creams like that.  Probably best not to complain, though.





Ladylike behaviour

A caption from the days before teleworking, of course.  These days busy executives can do a full working day and tawse their husbands as often as needed, all without even leaving the house.



Obviously, men are allowed in the toilets to clean them – but that’s a privilege reserved for the best-behaved and longest-serving residents.




If they put that finding together with the body profile they deduced from the outsized maid outfit also found in your house, they just might get a clear picture of what happened.  Science is great, isn’t it?  Just ask Serena and Alice.

Some people who are generally quite dim can turn out to be brilliant at maths.  Just like some of us with quite high IQs can often be fucking useless stupid morons – or as often as I can afford to pay people to tell me I am, anyway.




He must have very good genes.  Shame there’s no question of them being passed on to the next generation.






Slavish devotion

I don’t mind being ice cream coned in public – let’s face it, guys, we’ve all been there – but I do object to having to wait in the queue to buy her another one, with the cream oozing slowly through my hair and down my face. Especially as I know that second one’s only going into my trousers.  But my SO says it’s better that way.

 


Shoe fetishists have it easy.  So do humiliation freaks like me, actually: I mean, even the very worst, most cringe-making car-crash of a date can turn out to have been the best ever.

 

 

 

I suppose they could go and put the kettle on, then bring him out a nice hot steaming mug. Honestly, dommes can overcomplicate things some time.

These lovely ladies are at the English Mansion and the lady on the right there is Mistress Vixen, who also plays the piano rather sweetly.  ‘Behind the scenes footage of dommes not realising they were being filmed’ is an under-served fetish, possibly because it often ends in the destruction of valuable cameras (and less valuable cameramen).

 

 

It’s more difficult than it looks, you know.

 

 

She’s not easily impressed, to be honest. Especially by males who are inherently very unimpressive.


 

That’s your lot for today, I’m afraid!  You know the drill by now: five CtD captions, twice a week plus an occasional weekend ‘special’.  But fear not, for I bring tidings of discomfort of the most joyful kind: unto us is born a new blog.  Or, to put it less pretentiously, check out The Age of Femocracy by spicegrinder, a long-standing commentator on this blog.  It seems likely to feature brutal oppression, humiliation, pain and other fun stuff like that so do give it a go.

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