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| Impressive she became so good at it, if she was a late developer. |
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| She’s just trying to build trust. |
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| It’s funny: in a few weeks he’ll probably be complaining it’s too hot, staked out there on a lovely summer day with the honey and sweat running off his skin and the ants tickling his face. |
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| I tried a self-help book once. Apparently my feelings of inadequacy aren’t real. Oh right – so what have I been paying all that tribute for, over the years, then? Silly book. |
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| Good thing she decided not to wash her hair, as she hates saying no to people. |
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| Just don’t leave your used jodhpurs lying around. |
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| Time for a chivalrous gesture. |
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| No regrets. What you never have, you cannot lose. |
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| Oh dear. Let’s hope he’s not too rough with her. |
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| Only a few. She has more. |
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| Many stepdaughters find the arrival of a new parent uncomfortable. Looks like she’s found a way to deal with that discomfort; indeed transfer it to you. |
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| It’s your own fault: what you get for abusing her kindheartedness. |
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| Good thing they had the bat with them. They usually bring it along on their walks, though – just in case it might come in handy. |
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| …and so on. Sounds like it might become rather repetitive. I hope you don’t get too bored. |
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| Oddly, though, the client she still calls ‘Mr Superglue’ became a regular, after he left hospital. Subs, eh? You think you know how weird they’re going to be but they’re always twice as weird again. |
It’s basically self-enforcing.
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| Males who spend their lives being obedient to a dominant female partner and carrying out her every command live longer, you know. Fact. They get beaten less often too. |
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| Don’t worry, the first performance is just in front of a few special friends. |
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| Hands out of your trousers first, OK? Don’t want to embarrass yourself. |
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| Actually, you can have plans if you like. She really doesn’t mind one way or the other. |
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| To misquote the immortal Bing Hitler (3.15 in): ‘A domme won’t sting ye, as long as ye don’t annoy her… but how dae I know what annoys a domme?!” |
…cut me down with words so cruel
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| Many men just don’t appreciate how painful high-heeled shoes can be. |
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| There’s a place near me that does them ready-stomped. Very wide range of toppings too. |
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| I hope her arm’s not getting tired, the poor thing. I think someone’s doing all the work in this relationship. |
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| She has great influencing skills. |
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| Yes, but apart from that…? |
| And they say romance is dead. |
| They have a standard service charge of 175% for pay-piggies. But you should tip, too. |
| Many men’s misconceptions about lesbian sex actually have a biological basis: specifically, their brains are too small to understand it. |
| It’s good that she gets a chance to practice in a safe environment, where it really doesn’t matter if anything goes wrong. |
Extra one that I’ll push out there while it’s still a bit topical:
The divine Ms Harry, for contemplation and worship.
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| Sometimes she’s in the mood for screaming and frantic pleading but right now she’s trying to enjoy her book, so just keep it down, hmm? |
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| She can show you both heaven and hell – as, to be fair, can the priest but in a very different way. |
See? Cruella’s not all about bleak post-industrial settings. This photo-shoot’s in a bleak pre-industrial setting and a refreshing change it is too.
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| Don’t you just hate being the third one on a date? I do – but she doesn’t seem to care. |
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| Go on – not many kinksters get to live out their fantasies in reality. |
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| The frightening – truly terrifying – thing about assisting with any kind of competitive sport in OWK is that one of the Ladies has to lose. They often don’t take it with good grace, you know. |
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| Needless to say, inflicting this sort of public BDSM play on passing strangers is not OK. And even worse when it’s in front of members of your family, as here. |
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| The customer is always right. |
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| The gimp hoods are going on in the later, private ceremony. When you and flappy-ears take your real vows. |