wife – Page 6 – Contemplating the divine

Simply divine, darling

It’s always such a relief when finally the boxes are all unpacked, there’s a chain the right length in each room, all the pillories and cages have been assembled and you can get back to ordinary married life, for goodness sake.

She’s always taken roleplay very seriously. They tried medical fetish play once and it didn’t turn out well.

Making a decision of my own free will, to do exactly whatever she has told me, immediately, is the secret to a happy life I find.

Oh, you’ve already promised to honour and obey him, so adding love to the mix doesn’t change much.

The truth will not set you free.

Ordered relationship

According to Wikipedia’s page on Order Theory: “In other contexts, orders may capture notions of containment.” Well, that’s certainly true. There are several types of orders, if I understand correctly, among which ‘strict ordering’ is clearly the best.

Oh, I think we know what Natasha’s going to say. She’s been breaking boys’ legs since she was a teenager.

Sounds like a lot of fun. Get to work!

If everything not OK, there might be some bureaucratic formalities to go through, at the male holding centre.

You have something you’d rather spend 60% of your income on, than the divine Lady Sophia Black?

Awww no… I went to put in a link but her website has shut down and she is protecting her tweets. I hope Lady Sophia hasn’t retired from the scene. She’s wonderful.

She’s gone to all that trouble. The least you can do is suffer for her, hmm?

Women seem wicked when you’re unwanted

…and isn’t that great? Warning: safe for work video after the link.

But what if he never gets to like it? Hmm. Not sure she’s thought this one through.

Don’t even ask what the chicken mask is for. A magician never gives up her secrets.

Well, he wasn’t treated exactly like that, obviously. Dommes tend to keep their places heated quite well, for one thing, in my experience.

It’s actually much harder playing ‘guess the object that’s been shoved up the slave’s anus’ in a single-domme session. Because then you have to do the guessing and ‘hmmm… it’s definitely something that really hurts’ doesn’t narrow it down much.

Perhaps he should discuss it with his wife. Or perhaps she should, directly.

Lap of honour

She uses a system of rewards and penalties. Some days, when you’ve done particularly well, you’re rewarded by not being penalised.

I wasn’t a service oriented submissive when I started out, but my SO sent me on an orientation course.

The other things are negotiable. Just go ahead and negotiate – but you do have to be in position first, OK?

In any marriage, learning when to communicate – and when to stay silent – is as important as learning how.

I find these networking sites can really eat up my time. I had fifteen ironing assignments on Slavr last week, for example – took me hours to get all that done – and then there were eight notifcations waiting for me on Spankr. I thought all this technology was supposed to give us all more free time?

Subjugated

I think you might be about to experience a consciousness-lowering session.

I’m impressed she’s still got the energy after a 10-hour flight. Stewardesses are amazing, don’t you think?

At one point I lived near this really seedy red-light district near Spitalfields in London. Quite early on, I explained to one of the streetwalkers that I disapproved of exchanging money for sex and she was kind enough to let me give her money and then just go away every week thereafter. I wonder where she is now? The standing order still goes through to her bank account, so I guess she’s still around.

Because of this, obviously. Pervy lot, architects.

Many men find it a bit of a shock at first, being married. Just try and keep it to no more than 8-10 jolts a day, at moderate settings, and you’ll get used to it soon enough.

…and an extra one, for Paltego who enjoys photoshoots of dommes playing pool badly:

Back to his place

That seems very cruel. My own SO is much kinder – she’s got me on a diet consisting almost entirely of fatty bacon sandwiches and chocolate cake! Yum. She wants me to take up smoking too. She’s thoughtful like that.

There’s actually a Lifetime Achievement category at the annual snuff movie awards, but strangely no-one’s ever claimed it.

Well… OK. As long as she listens to his
concerns this time. Last time, she decided she needed to pee right in
the middle of the conversation and I think he never got to say
everything he intended.

There you are, you see? Now why did she let him get like that? Too soft on him, that’s what she is.

This blog doesn’t often feature dominant males, so say hi to Master Rod. You won’t be seeing him often, but maybe he’ll be brought out to play from time to time.

Blonde justice

Yes. Someone needs to let her know that you just can’t get a toilet bowl really clean by licking it, either. Will you tell her, or shall I?

Mmmm… nine-and-a-half times the fun!

I’m not generally a big fan of the US ‘mean young women’ style of femdom, but Miami Mean Girls is really pretty good. I think it’s the same as AmericanMeanGirls too. There’s a lady called Goddess Rodea (that’s not her, above) who I think is particularly wonderful. Worth a look.

Your kink is not her kink. Which is just as well, or you’d have to murder her, and think how awful that would be.

Could even have a key-swapping party. Such fun, until someone loses a key and then there’s weeks of recrimination and tears.

It’s going to be hard to carry all that shopping with a broken arm. Perhaps you could ask for the arm to be broken later, when you’re back? What’s that? You think that sort of impertinence might just annoy her? Yeah, probably right. Oh well, one-armed shopping it is.

Goddess Lexi of course, featured on Femdom Empire.

Domme-splaining

And don’t worry if you find yourself crying at night, miserable, love-lorn and alone, OK? Cos she’s fine with that too.

You don’t want to be one of those men that just satisifies his own sexual desire and leaves her unfulfilled, do you? No? Didn’t think so. Up you get, then. Don’t forget to scream on the way down.

I used to have this problem of my sessions being over too quickly. So I complained to my domme and now we have this system whereby my session officially ‘starts’ 23 hours before I actually arrive. I get a 10% discount off the usual hourly rate too, so it’s a good deal really.

So many new things to understand in this relationship. The dictionary’s a big help. So’s the shock collar, of course.

What a lovely spanking bench. Don’t you think?

Unsafe words

…and some bloody dangerous pictures too.

Ah, you always need to watch out for the feminine, unthreatening ones. And even more for the feminine, extremely threatening ones, obviously.

Oh well. Something to do while waiting to drive her home, I suppose.

I imagine most readers of this blog will mainly be familiar with this actress from Walk All Over Me, but I understand she was also in a science fiction series on TV.

She wishes she didn’t have to do this, you know. She hates pain. Oh no, hang on – that’s him. Never mind. She’s fine with it.

Actually, I come closest to achieving self respect in precisely those circumstances. But it’s never that close, admittedly.

…and a bonus topical one:

Reasons to be fearful

You need to be careful about dehydration, as that can cause brain damage. So, if the sub’s higher brain functions are important to you, make sure you give him plenty of water. But if not, don’t worry about it.

Somehow I’m guessing that saying ‘no – sorry, I think there’s nothing here like that’ would not actually result in the beating being cancelled.

You just have to learn to masturbate without using your hands. Or moving.

It’s the difference between a cold, professional relationship and the warm partnership of a real marriage.

There’s a lot more of it, though.