whip – Page 3 – Contemplating the divine

Days of their lives

The OWK ladies once more reminisce to a fictional (but enviable) interviewer, about the best of the best of days. In fact, they reminisce at great length, at least in comparison to the space available for an ordinary caption…

Perhaps one day I’ll post the transcript of the whole interview here, if I ever get round to making it up.

Treat you with a vengeance

From a song by the lovely Toyah. She once interviewed the strange, rather disturbing but oddly exciting Miss Martindale, of Aristasia fame, you know.

Images are unrelated, unless they’re not.

You might want to keep it handy; I sense it’s going to be one of those days.

Keep calm, she’s a professional, she does this all day.

The key is to listen to both sides of the story, then ignore whatever the male said. After that, it should be easy enough to get both sides to agree who was at fault and on the appropriate course of action.

The easy way was difficult, but this is – oddly – going to go a lot more smoothly. She’s quite determined, so that’s that.

Don’t be such a wimp. Don’t you trust her?

There’s no pleasing some people

I’m glad to say.

The rating scale goes up as high as ‘adequate’ but unlike many such platform rating systems, most clients don’t hand out the highest rating as a matter of routine.

Since he’d gone to the trouble of bringing it, she did give him a quick twenty with the stupid thing, before sending him back to get the right one, in order to start the punishment proper. Plus the extras for wasting her time, of course.

It’s funny, because the next day she had a client who found her socks *too* stinky. Unlike this situation, she didn’t send him away straight away: instead, he stayed the night tied up on the floor, face down in a pile of laundry, as I understand it. But he had to apologise expensively too.

If he misbehaves, he’ll certainly experience days when he is much *less* happy – and not just over the next two weeks.

Nubbin has a giantess fetish and they each have a ‘making love to my girlfriend while this sad little guy remains locked in chastity’ fetish, so they’re very well suited to one another.

She’s a professional so she’ll castrate you anyway, even if she doesn’t enjoy it or see the point. I think that kind of dedication is to be celebrated, don’t you?

NB, nursenicoclinic appears no longer to be operating (pun intended) but if anyone can find someone to whom I should be crediting the image of this lovely if occasionally rather malpractising lady, please speak up.

Soothing lullabies

Some nursery rhymes to help you relax and go to sleep. Everything will be fine.

Oh, you didn’t realise that I wrote poetry?

Just wrap me up in chains

I’m not thinking of escape.

Why would I want to go anywhere? Here’s good.

She’d discipline you herself, but she’s too tenderhearted.

Why complicate matters? Sometimes all you need is a whip, a helpless victim, a remote location and an iron-clad alibi.

There are charities that will take care of widowed men, but I’ve heard they can be pretty brutal. So, I think you’re better off with her. Try keeping your silly men’s libber nonsense to yourself; that should help.

Don’t worry – it’s perfectly normal to find things a little uncomfortable when current and former girlfriends get together. Even if you weren’t dangling from a hook with your legs held wide apart by a spreader bar, it would be a stressful situation.

She builds you up just to put you down

What a clown.

Funny how often that happens. It’s as if the spinner’s drawn to that outcome.

I discovered very early on in my dating career that the secret to really satisfying a woman sexually is to make sure she never meets me.

She has a similar approach to the men in her life – she likes them hungry, but not actually starving to death, or at least not too quickly.

She likes to feel a big cock inside her, so why can’t you?

Remarkably, AFM won a Pulitzer back in 1957 but its editorial standards have slipped a little since.

Service tension

Especially if it limits her ability to spend your own money how she likes.

Consequences again – and quite right too. How could you have been so thoughtless, you monster?

Don’t worry, I hear they’re developing a kind of slow-release capsule so you won’t need a new dose every day.

Some might question why such a wise, benevolent and just ruler even needs ‘palace dungeons’ – and a few people did, near the start of her reign, but they seem to have gone away now.

They operate a walk-in, crawl-out service.

What a relief it must be to her, to hear his voice – and she must be especially pleased he phoned her first, not the police. That shows real trust and devotion.

Memories, reposted for technical reasons*

Yes, it’s time for more of those highly inaccurate (and entirely made-up) reminiscences by the very first contingent of Ladies from the Other World Kingdom. Blatant homage or affectionate rip-off? Or should that be the other way around? You decide. Or don’t, if you’d rather not.

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* Apologies – not a new post. For a long time I have been getting 4-5 obviously automated and spammy comments per day, all of them on this post which was published on June 15th. I don’t want to restrict commenting, so I have been deleting them manually. But it’s getting worse and today I got about 30. All on the one post… which is pretty f***ing stupid even for an algorithm.

Some of the generic messages are actually quite funny, given the content of the blog and the post below especially. e.g. “My co-workers think I’m wasting too much time reading this blog, but it gives me so much useful information for my life.” I’d certainly like to have seen the spammer who designed the algorithm spend some time in the OWK