insects – Page 5 – Contemplating the divine

Since love is blind, then from the mind, all womankind should rout them.

It’s nice when newlyweds have pet names for each other. But ‘bully’ just isn’t appropriate. ‘Boss’ is a good one – he could try that, maybe?

I’m glad she’s taking precautions because some itching powders can be really nasty. But see those gloves? That’s safe BDSM play. She’ll be fine.


Oh – stop worrying! They’re not going to starve to death or anything! This blog can’t abide excessively violent scenes, you know that. No: they’ll die of thirst long before they starve.

Let’s hope this one turns out better than the previous 117. But if not, that’s valuable knowledge too. Science: it’s all about reproducibility of the results.

Very lightly. Safe, sane, consensual – remember?

Just like a prayer

Humbler and humbler we become.

Brisk, businesslike and to the point.

I was the victim in an abusive relationship once. It’s actually quite a traumatic memory. I was upset for months afterwards… begging her to come back.

It’s good to have a hobby.

Charlotte’s Web – the femdom version. With bacon for supper.

Not just the Pink Panther scene

Before we start, here’s a bit of found femdom that I haven’t seen anywhere else. You remember Valerie Leon, the lady from the Pink Panther movie (yes you do, it was probably one of your formative sexual experiences, right? Pervert.)

That’s not the found femdom, everyone knows about that. (Oh yes you do! Stop lying.).

Anyway, an advertising agency in the 1970s obviously thought that the male submissive market was an underexploited market for aftershave so… this. And this. Maybe others, I don’t know.

I imagine it was rather effective. Thinking about the typical British aftershave from the 70s and 80s, I think it’s a fair bet that if you splashed it on liberally before visiting a domme, she’d give you a pretty memorable session. Possibly using a bullwhip from the maximum distance.

Thought you’d like to know.

On we go…

Oh no, not again. Honestly, it’s like that story’s following me around.

Well, at least two of them like pain a lot. If he really insists, perhaps they could hold a vote.

Yes, you don’t want to cause ofence to religious people. This blog certanly never does that, except perhaps to the poor evangelical guy who had a Christian blog of the same name… sorry about that, mate.

I hate it when the legs get caught between my teeth. Don’t you hate that?

hmm? wha?

Making babies together

Hey there! Morning
tiger! How ya doing?

You want to ring a doctor? Oh! Why? Is something wrong?

Awww… not too personal to tell me, surely honey?

Not gonna tell? OK. Let me guess. The end of your prick has swollen up and it’s
red and sore, right? And you’re feeling
kinda woozy?

Uh huh. Well, I know
what that is.

What!?? No! It is NOT a sexually transmitted
disease. Honey!

No, it’s much more beautiful
than that. We’re going to have a baby!
Well… I am. But you’re going to
hatch it.

Remember when we fucked last night, and you felt a sudden
sharp sting at the end of your cock?
Well, that was me! And it wasn’t a sting, it was an egg-laying
proboscis. And right now my lovely
little daughter is all curled up inside your cock, ready to grow.

No…no, don’t try to leave, honey. She wants to be with her Mommy. And if she senses we’re growing far apart,
she’ll release more of the paralysis toxin.
The only reason you’re conscious is that I’m here. She only needs to do that for a few days,
though. She’s got filaments spreading
along your nerve fibres, and when they reach your brain she can take
control. You’ll be free to move and
speak and stuff, but she’ll be in charge.
That way she can keep you safe as she incubates and feeds. It’s like being carried around wrapped in a cushion
of your favourite food!

Hmm? Oh, about nine
months, rather like you humans. She’ll
burrow up into your torso in about a week or so, though, there’s not enough
flesh in your cock to sustain her for more than a few days. She’s got feeding
tendrils that’ll spread throughout your body… muscles, liver, lungs. She’ll take a little from everywhere, try to
keep you alive as long as possible. Your brain’s probably going to be last on her menu – it’s kinda yummy but if you eat it up too quick, the host dies too soon.

Anyway, have some of this fruit. You’re probably hungry,
right? That’s her as well, trying to
fatten you up. I’ll fix breakfast. You want some
pancakes? I can do pancakes, the old-fashioned way. With maple syrup!

All your praises they shall ring if it be your will … to let me sing

Erm… sorry, was I supposed to be typing something down here?

Well it matters to the bug. Still, I suppose it’s quite low down in the grand scheme of things. No point paying attention to the feelings of worms or cockroaches, is there?

Yes. How awful it must be for guys with huge cocks, who are into SPH, did you ever think of that? Poor souls…

And I’ll be thinking about her (Lady Sophia Black, ladies and gentlemen!)

The nickname’s a bit unfair. It’s not his fault his breath smells of piss.

Active-aggressive behaviour

Actually, I think her levels of married bliss have never been higher.

Have you noticed their expressions? I don’t think they’re going to argue about this. Sometimes couples already really know what needs to be done – the role of the external expert is just to help them open up about it to each other.

He does still participate in rapes from time to time, though. Just in a different role.

Valuable protein.

That kind of bitchy behaviour is quite unusual in OWK, actually. Generally, the ladies work within a supportive and positive team culture. It’s about mutual respect in the workplace, basically.

Don’t question why she needs to be so free

…she’ll tell you it’s the only way to be.

Dinner parties can be such hell, can’t they?

Seems fair.

This is the lovely Mina Thorne, in a very fine video for Men Are Slaves (well of course they are)

Hmm. Maybe there’s some hidden food and when I find it I’ll also find a way to kill the cockroaches? No, that’s not it…

You’ll feel a lot better once you know you have no secrets from her. Well – when the welts have died down, anyway.

If you look very carefully, you can just see one of his toes poking out, I reckon. He’ll get in trouble for that if she finds out,though, so keep it to yourself, OK?

More of that kind of thing

Mistress Debbie to you. Scarier than she sounds, huh?

I can feel it helping already.

Well, it wasn’t specifically on his hard limits list, so I suppose it’s OK.

Lexi Sindel. Who else? Well… some ants, I suppose. Oh – and a bloke.

You’ll soon learn to detect the early signs of a long period of impotence. Pursing her lips, finding fault with you – that kind of thing is usually a good early indication of a prolonged period in which you’ll find sexual release difficult if not impossible to achieve.

It’s good to have occasional surprises in marriage.

Put your lovin’ hand out baby

It’s what she says when my hand’s been doing a bit too much lovin’. I just say ‘Yes Ma’am’.

The beautiful Mistress Mina Thorne, whose dungeon I’m sure is entirely free of creepy-crawlies. Except her clients, obviously.

Perhaps these things should come with instructions.

Sounds like a win-win.

Actually it arrived two days ago. Come on – you have to tell her sooner or later. If she calls the couriers and finds out, she’s going to be very cross.

That’s very considerate of her, isn’t it? They’re not all heartless bitches, the ladies featured on this site, you know.

No means no

There’s been a lot of news lately about the need for men always to seek a woman’s consent before any sexual activity. And I think that’s exactly right. If she says no – that’s it. You’ll just have to wait until next month.

Finally found something you’re good at! Well done.

The selection process is quite rigorous. Some don’t survive. But there’s plenty of them, so that’s really not a problem.

Well, if being told off and humiliated by an attractive lady in a sharp business suit doesn’t take his mind off sexy things, I don’t know what will!

They’re more kind of… snaily, if you know what I mean. You don’t? Oh. Well – kind of like a cockroach that’s been squished under a boot most of the day – and I expect you know how bad that tastes!

Awww… sweet.