Category: girls with guns

Miss-judged



I’ve been a very bad wolf.

Actually, there’s a funny story about this one.  It turned out there were no fewer than three Miguels on the beach!  So as you can imagine things got a little embarassing – and of course we soon ran out of condoms and beer, so I had to run back to the shop. Still, it all worked out OK in the end.

You can cary an orgasm donor card, you know: ‘I want to help someone come when I die’?  Not that it really makes much difference, but prior consent is a thing with some people.

I think he’s looking at her funny now.  Some men never learn, huh?

And the evening, and the next day too, if need be. One wrist can outlast a great many bottoms, as any schoolmistress will attest.


Taking liberties


There are a few other differences: for example, they use shorter words and less complicated concepts in the male stream, for obvious reasons.

I already wanted to be laundry boy.  Very, very much.

I’ve heard she’s a bit of a sweetie in real life. Torture is just a job for her, you know?  She’s awfully good at it, though.


No… no. I think that’s all very reassuring.
This is the truly delightful (yes: another Lady with the misfortune to have encountered servitor in the quivering flesh), beautiful, witty and sexy Miss Tiffany Naylor. 
Oh, I don’t know.  I think I’d quite like to be at least a little bit late.


Femalevolence


Oh, just go with it. You enjoy sexy abbatoir play, she enjoys bacon sandwiches.  You’re very compatible.

Don’t worry. She respects the hard limits imposed by the Geneva Convention.  No hollow-nosed bullets, just a good clean round through the forehead if you get the password wrong.

Poor thing. She obviously misses him terribly.

Yes, I could use a muscle relaxant.  I’m feeling strangely tense about this – which is silly, because there’s really nothing that can go wrong with a tonsils operation.

Love that biker chic.  He’s a switch – prefers to top, but confident enough to play the strong and silent sub on the bottom, you know?  Goes by the name of Master Marcus when he’s domming.  He’s also bisexual, or he soon will be, anyway.


Sub title


 

On the other hand, until she’s actually checked the lingerie, she won’t know.  I mean, he might.

Safewords are a hard limit for my own domme.  She understands why some people like to use them in play, but it’s just not for her.  Or – therefore – for me, obviously.

Oohhh I ‘d say… three times…maybe three and a half times?  Oh – sorry – you mean in absolute terms?
Gotta take out those male supremacist religious maniacs.  We like female supremacist religious maniacs.  With a vigorous approach to rooting out sin.


I’ve heard employers like to see a broad range of skills on your CV (resumé, Americans, resumé), so this sounds like 10,000 hours well spent.


People and things

These things, for example.


Just for once, the linked music video is related.


Loosely, anyway.

A stage magician tried to hypnotise me once, but he failed completely.  I am one of those very rare people who just have too much willpower, he told me!  I tried to go back again the next night, to see if he wanted another go, but my wife said I had to stay at home and do chores, so that was that.

Yeah.  Why not?

Yes Ma’am.

Yes Ma’am.  Again.






Actually, I’m not that worried.  I was told once by a girl I trust that my penis is microscopic.  No way any sniper’s hitting that!


When you see her, say a prayer and kiss your heart goodbye

She’s trouble, in a word get closer to the fire.  Run faster, her laughter burns you up inside.

Mistress Annie, and her bearded keyboards boy, of course.

She’s very good with pain.


If you don’t want to do that, just tell her.  You could try stamping your little foot and having a tantrum even – you never know, it might work out quite well.


Drill, baby, drill.

It’s funny how men go on and on about themselves and their jobs, but women rarely do.  She should try being more assertive.
This is what a femme fatale really looks like.  Believe me – a long cigarette holder and a slinky dress has nothing on a battery of field artillery.




And when he pulls his frilly nylon panties right up tight

…He feels a dedicated follower of fashion

Oh yes he is (oh yes he is)

But you get bigger tips, so maybe it’s nearly even.

There!  Now who can still claim that men can’t take on front-line combat roles?
I’ve heard chlorinated water can be quite good for cuts and bleeding welts, so maybe if you ask nicely she’ll ask them to dip you in the pool when you’re done.


Yet oddly enough, he still gets it wrong. Men and housework… will they ever learn?

Sissy fights always end the same way, at least when wives are around to step in.

Violent sexual imagery

… and I just want to check none of you would be terribly offended by that?*





I think he might have forgotten, actually.  Hope they’re not too upset.








I’d like to hear the good news, very, very slowly?






As submissive as she wants, in practice.






I don’t know what I was thinking…






Men have too much stuff.  Most men do, anyway. I have an iron and a mop I’m very proud of… otherwise pretty minimalist.













* Warning: American or other readers familiar with Peter Capaldi only as the twelth doctor might find themselves disturbed by this. Possibly even ‘extremely miffed’.