Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.
… all the way to the chip shop.
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| It might. |
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| Let’s hope he doesn’t say anything embarrassing. |
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| A male submisive who fantasises about domestic drudgery but actually doesn’t know the first thing about housework? Wow – pretty crazy idea, huh? |
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| The worst of it is, she doesn’t allow me nearly enough pocket money to even dream of saving up to pay for a session with her. So it’ll be bananas all the way. |
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| She knows, having tested a few to destruction. |
You’ll lose your mind and play.
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| Obviously, I don’t approve for one moment of non-consensual BDSM play. I’ve made that very clear to my SO, and She in turn has explained that she doesn’t give a fuck what I think. So we have an understanding. |
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| It’s not going to be like having actual sex, of course. There won’t be all that “What the fuck? Already? Is that it?” business at the end, for one thing. |
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| I’m very suggestive. |
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| What’s the vibrator got that I haven’t, I’d like to know? |
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| He’s probably feeling very relaxed already, knowing he’s in such safe hands. |
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| I won’t give away the ending. Oh all right then, I will. The book falls off and he gets the crap beaten out of him with a perspex cane. OK? |
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| Now I understand why they make the interns wear shorts. |
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| erm… Translation? Rotation? Summation? |
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| I’ve heard that if you insult the waiting staff in some restaurants, they’ll spit into your food. But I just can’t bring myself to be other than grovellingly respectful to a waitress. What’s a sub to do? |
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| One day she’ll meet Mr Perfect and won’t feel the need to enslave and degrade him. One day. |
And I still do both, I’m very glad to say.
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| Of course, you can still try negotiating your way out of this if you ask nicely. I mean, it only took her an hour to get all that ready. She won’t mind. |
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| And then it’ll be the turn of the next one, and so on for the rest of the evening. |
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| Sounds like she’s looking after him very well. |
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| Men rarely think these things through. Some of us are lucky enough to have plenty of time to think things through, free from any distractions except the sight of the corner of the room and the feeling of a sore bottom. |
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| It’s not the crime; it’s the cover-up. And it’s not the paddle or the strap; it’s the cane. |
A word used mainly with “love” or “surrender”. Or – best of all – both.
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| Never seen her scrubbing her back with the bath brush, though. |
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| Still, he’ll have a unique souvenir of what looks to have been a memorable session. |
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| Yes, M’m, thankee M’m. |
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| And so does everyone else. Not that they care. |
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| Yeah, that would be awful. Let me know if you see anyone like that reading the blog, OK? I’ll kick them right off. |
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| Probably best. A little crying and pleading is OK, but after an hour or more it can start to get quite irritating. I’m sure you’d want to spare her that. |
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| The trick is to turn the slave all the way upside down. But I expect she’ll work it out eventually. Some dommes use scissors, but that’s cheating really. |
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| No fool like an old, emasculated fool, eh? |
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| I’m not so sure he was all that gentle… but I guess we can agree to differ. |
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| It’s going to be his special night, too. |
She’s the kind of a girl that makes the News of the World
Yes you could say she was attractively built.
(Pictures are unrelated. I just like the song and the idea of linking it to femdom.)
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| Yes, do try. Fortunately, I had a bit of an off day when writing these captions, so there are no sexy thoughts here. Carry on – it’s perfectly safe. |
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| Of course, you can refuse if you like. But then she’ll stay cross. That’s really not good news. |
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| Hmmm. Well, I’ll try anything once, you know? |
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| Errr… two and a half? Two and three-quarters… thr… three? |
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| Actually, this isn’t one of mine. It just arrived in my email inbox. I thought I’d share it. |
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| Or indeed speak. |
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| You see, it’s not actually a mail-order bride service. It’s for mail-order husbands. |
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| She’s obviously know. Most of the girls in the office know all about your, ermm… little problem. |
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| He doesn’t take up much room. |
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| Just a little light spanking. Then the heavy paddle. So much more fun, on the front. |
Do not seek to question it.
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| It’s funny how you sometimes feel let down after a birthday, don’t you think? As if there should have been more to it, somehow? Oh well – there’s always next year. In you go. |
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| Yes, let’s get it sorted. |
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| Still am, I’m afraid to say. Ow! |
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| And she’s used to getting what she wants. |
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| Easy to confuse the two. Wouldn’t it be awful, though, if you visited a beautiful young professional lady for an intensive CBT session, then found yourself spending the next two hours putting positive feelings into practice? |
Goodness me, it seems that twenty-one secrets of a happy marriage are still not enough for some of you! Frankly, if your marriages are that unhappy, ladies, have you considered drowning the obnoxious little git? And men – well, you can just drown yourselves, can’t you? Try not to make a mess.
Anyway, for those without access to conveniently uninhabited locations with deep water, here are yet another seven secrets for a happy marriage.
1. If she wants to try something new in the bedroom, try to put up with it without complaining, even if it’s not really your thing.
2. If you unexpectedly find a sex toy in her drawer, just put it back the way you found it and don’t mention it. She’s probably waiting for the right time to introduce it into your lovemaking.
3. If she’s really angry about something you’ve done, she probably won’t mention it immediately. She’ll wait until she thinks the time and place are just right, so the two of you can discuss it properly.
4. Sometimes women won’t directly say what it is they really want to try in your lovemaking… but they’re sending out subliminal signals all the time, if you can only learn to tune into them!
5. Many men dread those long moments of silence, when she’s really annoyed and you’re waiting for her to start talking about it. But don’t. That silence helps. It gives you both the time to think about what’s happened – and what’s going to happen now. And then in a few moments, you can both devote yourselves to trying to make your relationship work better. And that’s something to look forward to. Isn’t it?
6. Too many men rush straight for the flower stall when they know they have an upset wife. Sure, all girls like to receive flowers from time to time, but if it’s a substitute for understanding her anger, don’t expect your two dozen long-stemmed roses to solve the problem. You’ll probably end up making things worse – especially for yourself.
7. Mornings matter. What’s the first thing you do together each day? Think about how you can use it to tell your husband what you think of him, especially after a night of lovemaking.
