A fairy-tale romance

… with me as the frog.



She’s trying to de-clutter.


Should last her until the spring, her favourite time of the year, when the first fresh green nettles start to arrive.


It’s probably that damn dog.  The same one that keeps stealing her used underwear.

It’s a service industry.








I guess she would.  Vigorously, immediately and without mercy.

Sexual kneeling


Mmm… concussion play.




To be fair, she did promise Simon a blow-job.  So don’t dawdle.

They did a guy last year who – purely by coincidence – actually developed tonsillitis two weeks later. It took forever to get him strapped down the second time, goodness only know what they poor thing thought they were planning to cut off on that occasion!

It likes looking at the pretty pictures and thinking naughty thoughts, though, doesn’t it?
Well, all right then. But I hope Mike doesn’t go talking about it at work on Monday, that’s all.


Hard-core scorn



Anyway, she can’t chat long.  She’s just off to the pet shop.  Wants to buy a couple of dogs, apparently.

It’ll be good when you’re married and you can just just be yourself.
I’m gender non-binary.  Well.. gender fractional, anyway.  About 1/7, my SO reckons.

Forgetfulness?

It’s good to know a domme with a really creative imagination.


I’m gonna give you some terrible thrills

Like a

Earth… it’s like a drive-in burger bar for hungry space travellers.

My signalling organ is permanently set to ‘silent mode’.
Not going to work – you need to use an internationally recognised safeword as established by the Geneva Convention.  In Esperanto.


I’m sure he’d like to apologise to her and to women in general, for the thoughtless behaviour that got him into his mess.  Trouble is, that mouth’s not really built for speaking. Plus, everyone he’s going to meet from now on is likely to be a man.




What do you mean, it’s not science fiction?  This is your future.

Cower pose

Actually, little wifey has a spare and could easily be persuaded that medical monitoring at work is important too.
Remember: she loves you and would never want to cause you any pain.  But sometimes she feels she has to.
Nicer, but dimmer.
It’s quite a slow way to communicate.  But effective.

She believes equally in strict maternal and uxorial discipline.


Conscious incompetence

That’s me…with occasional periods of unconsciousness, when She plays a little too vigorously.

I
don’t know about you, but I’ve reached the point in my life where just
stuffing high-value notes into an envelope gives me an erection.




He gets up early and sings his little song.

The irony is, they then use ordinary gelding clippers to remove what remains of the burnt semi-dissolved flesh. So it’s all a bit pointless, really.  Will you tell her, or shall I?


Unaccompanied males can enter the country on their own passports, of course.  It’s just leaving that’s forbidden.
Best not to argue, though.


I was so upset I cried

… all the way to the chip shop.


It might.
Let’s hope he doesn’t say anything embarrassing.
A male submisive who fantasises about domestic drudgery but actually doesn’t know the first thing about housework?  Wow – pretty crazy idea, huh?
The worst of it is, she doesn’t allow me nearly enough pocket money to even dream of saving up to pay for a session with her. So it’ll be bananas all the way.
She knows, having tested a few to destruction.


Corrigible







And if you don‘t think so… well, that just proves her point, doesn’t it?







Time for some firmer measures here too.







I have no idea what that means.  I don’t even speak Swiss – or Austrian or whatever.







I paid a prostitute for a ‘girlfriend experience’ once.  She took out an injunction and banned me from being within half a mile of her.  I am allowed to visit her flat once a month to make the payments, though.









Yes.  Yes it is.


Fragile masculinity

…and that’s a precious thing, because – oops!  Dropped it.  Oh well.  I never really used it anyway.  I’ll fetch a dustpan and brush, shall I, Ma’am?

Now that sounds like a man who’s strong enough to say sorry.







We hold these truths to be self-evident.  That all men are created feral.

Perhaps if you save up, you could buy her time for an evening or something. On your wedding anniversary, for example.  That would be a nice gesture.

Divorce in haste, repent at leisure.  The positive thing is that he’s actually still seeing quite a lot of his wife, which I think is very healthy.

 

It’s called ‘I dare you even to think about not telling the truth, you devious little brat.’