smoking – Page 2 – Contemplating the divine

And make her some great Princess, six feet high!

Grand, epic, homicidal.

Armpit Fetishist Monthly is just another example of the decline of traditional media, another fine publication swept away by the Internet. I recall their cookery page with particular affection.

…and by the way, I have posted this before even with the same comment, but… Oh. My. Goddess. I have to see this movie!

My office established a system of disciplinary procedures for inappropriate sexual activity. Which to my mind is just having your cake and eating it too… or would be, were I allowed cake.

I’m thinking of paella – perhaps a nice Rioja to go with it? And maybe Roger might like to try bastinado, in keeping with the Spanish theme.

With luck, she’ll take up chewing gum obsessively.

Love hurts and so does she.

By the way, this lady is going to feature here rather a lot from now on. Unless she takes out an injunction or something (don’t you hate it when women do that?). Nata!

You know how bad girls get

Ah.. school days – cold showers, long tedious detentions, horrible over-cooked cabbage for lunch, exams and homework… not to mention the corporal punishment and the humiliating bullying. It seems so long ago now… must be months at least. I really must book another session.


No I never said that! So unfair, you horrible old cow. Oops.

But not so brave as to refuse. There’s brave and there’s sheer suicidal lunacy.

Spelling ‘wear’ wrong shouldn’t go unnoticed and uncorrected, either.

Mistress Teresa May, obviously. Of all the things that could complicate a career in professional domination, “Having the same name as the Prime Minister” (or vhery nhearly the same) was probably not one that she anticipated.

I think she’s probably right there. You might have to conduct a careful examination of her feet before you’re sure, though.

He probably doesn’t know what the capital of Gabon is. Trouble is, nor does she. I wonder how they’ll resolve the impasse?

Sub title

On the other hand, until she’s actually checked the lingerie, she won’t know. I mean, he might.

Safewords are a hard limit for my own domme. She understands why some people like to use them in play, but it’s just not for her. Or – therefore – for me, obviously.

Oohhh I ‘d say… three times…maybe three and a half times? Oh – sorry – you mean in absolute terms?

Gotta take out those male supremacist religious maniacs. We like female supremacist religious maniacs. With a vigorous approach to rooting out sin.

I’ve heard employers like to see a broad range of skills on your CV (resumé, Americans, resumé), so this sounds like 10,000 hours well spent.

So pretty, oh so pretty

Not the version by those dreadful yobs, of course, but by Mistress Joan.

Oh well, I suppose it’s something to take my mind off it.

She’s Prisoner Welfare Officer too, so you know she’s got your best interests at heart.

A lot of new findommes have the wrong idea about financial domination. It’s actually quite hard work. But not for the domme, obviously.

This being a fantasy blog, I expect she’s going to ‘punish’ you by doing all the things you’ve always dreamed about, rather than just divorcing you and exposing you to ridicule in the newspapers.

They’re very zealous about it. Indeed, I believe that some of his team are about to raid an establishment where they’ve received a tip-off about repeated violations of the ban on smoking in the workplace. They don’t give any warning – just burst straight in through the door, cameras at the ready.

Servility costs nothing

(although finding someone to whom to be servile can run to several hundred pounds an hour, in my experience)

This is something many men still have to learn. Just because a woman chooses to wear something sexy, you can’t assume she’s doing so for your pleasure.

Any fundamentalist religious types who don’t believe in female supremacy might care to meditate on why the Divine Being provided males with testicles in such a handy container, and then wired them stright into the pain centres. Don’t you think She’s given us a bit of a clue, there?

Mis-statement I’d like to forget?

One day he’s going to have to give up the thing that matters most to him. Her.

Yeah, the usual order.

Back to his place

That seems very cruel. My own SO is much kinder – she’s got me on a diet consisting almost entirely of fatty bacon sandwiches and chocolate cake! Yum. She wants me to take up smoking too. She’s thoughtful like that.

There’s actually a Lifetime Achievement category at the annual snuff movie awards, but strangely no-one’s ever claimed it.

Well… OK. As long as she listens to his
concerns this time. Last time, she decided she needed to pee right in
the middle of the conversation and I think he never got to say
everything he intended.

There you are, you see? Now why did she let him get like that? Too soft on him, that’s what she is.

This blog doesn’t often feature dominant males, so say hi to Master Rod. You won’t be seeing him often, but maybe he’ll be brought out to play from time to time.

Domme-splaining

And don’t worry if you find yourself crying at night, miserable, love-lorn and alone, OK? Cos she’s fine with that too.

You don’t want to be one of those men that just satisifies his own sexual desire and leaves her unfulfilled, do you? No? Didn’t think so. Up you get, then. Don’t forget to scream on the way down.

I used to have this problem of my sessions being over too quickly. So I complained to my domme and now we have this system whereby my session officially ‘starts’ 23 hours before I actually arrive. I get a 10% discount off the usual hourly rate too, so it’s a good deal really.

So many new things to understand in this relationship. The dictionary’s a big help. So’s the shock collar, of course.

What a lovely spanking bench. Don’t you think?

All that she wants

… she gets.

Best not to argue. You don’t want to end up with your allowance stopped again.

You would. Well, you can’t shoot a smoking scene with unlit cigarettes. Looks like they’re going to have to revert to plan B: ball-busting.

And we all know how slowly that can be.

She’s going to get their top saleswoman award this month. Quite remarkable, with only one client.

Anyway, she’s got a bunch of medical gear, so if it goes wrong she’s well-prepared.

Put in place

So I’m just supposed to hang around until she’s ready to talk, eh? Tsk. Bloody typical.

Mmm… keys.

You can give upward feedback too. From waaaay down there.

Hmm. Quite a predicament! Hope little wifey doesn’t smell the smoke! You know what she’s like…

She really shouldn’t have to worry about damage to boys’ internal organs. After all, damage to their external organs is so much more fun.

Giving until it hurts

I donate all my spare money to the retired dominatrices’ malevolent fund. It doesn’t make me feel any better about myself, but it saves all that time that I used to waste buying stuff, eating out or going on holiday.

I have a very active fantasy life, as you can tell. Sometimes it does go too far, though. I mean, really…men’s lib?? Come on Servitor…let’s try to keep the blog reasonably grounded in reality.

Yes, I’ve never had any problem with female authority figures. My difficulty arises when we have 19 year-old female interns around the office. They’re just not used to giving orders or having someone else get their coffee. But over the course of a six week internship, they usually get the idea.

To cut a long story short: she said so, he protested, she insisted, he tearfully agreed and now it’s one of their biggest sellers. So he can afford to give her even more tribute. Funny how things work out.

That doesn’t mean she would always give you a handjob, of course.

…and why it will continue to happen.