Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.
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| Girls can play so rough…. |
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| If it helps you bear the discomfort, today’s actually the best day because from tomorrow there’ll be sand in it too. Not deliberately, but you know how it gets everywhere. |
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| She’s not going to bother asking him what he thinks his biggest flaw is. Anyway, that’s for her to decide. |
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| Her eyes are up there. And they’re looking into your soul. |
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| You can see yourself out. |
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| She’s a perfectionist – and you’re a long way from perfect. Still, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, as they say. |
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| Obviously it’s going to be a bit tense for you, waiting to learn the outcome. You’ll be able to hear them at it, in the next room, so if you hear her have an orgasm, you’ll know she – what’s that? You don’t know what your wife’s orgasm sounds like? Oh. OK. Well, best of luck anyway. |
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| He used to practice a hands-on management style, but I expect those days are over now. |
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| What’s the hockey stick got to do with it? Honestly, don’t they teach them how to speak properly in schools these days? |
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| There was something actually but… erm… oh, nothing important. It can wait. |
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| There used to be a big problem with this sort of play in an office environment: which washrooms to use, the ladies’ or the gents’? But more and more workplaces are moving to unisex, thank goodness, which makes (heterosexual) toilet play a lot less likely to cause a stir. |
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| Yeah, she’s a sweetie. By the way – this picture is the last known image of Helmut Kleinwanger, a German businessman who disappeared on a solo hiking holiday in the Czech republic. If anyone has any information about what happened to him, please post it on a femdom porn story blog. |
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| According to Freud, many men suffer from castration anxiety. I quite often do, to be honest, but so far it’s always turned out OK. |
This caption was of course inspired by the 1960s film The Pure Hell of St Trinian’s, in which the temporary headmistress Matilda Harker-Packer (replacing the jailed Miss Fritton), played by Irene Handl, states proudly that she is among the very few heads of educational establishments who can produce a certificate actually proving her sanity. And you thought I only watched St Trinian’s movies for the sexy sixth-formers in gymslips!
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| Just run around for a bit to try to keep warm. You’ll need the accumulated body warmth, for when you’re in the pillory, later. Especially during the snowballing scene and the ice bucket challenge (I know, I know: ice bucket challenges haven’t been a thing since 2019 but you just try telling them that…). |
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| He’ll have to learn to write backwards, which will be difficult. Fortunately, they have some very effective teaching methods, for young males. |
I was once threatened with ‘formal disciplinary procedures’ by the Head of Human Resources at a company I was working for. Needless to say, I initially misinterpreted her offer! So it nearly got quite embarrassing but as soon as she explained that she wasn’t speaking about HR matters in a work context, but just wanted to put me across her lap and spank my naughty bottom, we both relaxed and ended up having rather a fun evening.
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| Don’t worry, it doesn’t stay that impersonal. She has pet names for each of her favourite interns – and for those she most dislikes, too, oddly enough. |
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| She likes to give direct feedback on her employees’ performance, so she’ll probably end up asking if she can borrow the remote. |
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| Expensive things. That’s why they call them ‘expenses’ after all. |
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| Guys who sexualise and objectify women in a work context are the worst, aren’t they? I’m glad I published this post, so I can make my views on that clear. |
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| What a very understanding work environment. Basically, they are creating an unsafe space just for you. I hope you’ll be suitably grateful. |
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| Ah… furniture privileges. I remember the first time my SO told me I wasn’t allowed on the furniture any more and I cheekily asked if that included the whipping bench. How we laughed… or we would have done if I’d dared say it out loud. |
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| Elbow-length latex gloves should come with a safety warning, in my view. And latex gloves that cover the full length of the arm are just unsafe, no matter what the ‘experts’ might tell us about the length of the lower intestine. |
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| See all the little gold rings on their toes? Aren’t they pretty? They’ve got lots more gold rings, for you to wear, so maybe you’ll look just as pretty too. But they’re not going on your toes, obviously. |
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| If it’ll help, the soaking wet towel she is planning to ram down your throat will taste quite soapy. |
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| You might think that spousal abuse is neither funny nor sexy. My wife disagrees, though: she loves it, so who am I to argue? |
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| It is. We so easily lose sight of what’s really important in this world. |
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| Ah… the Police. They never do anything, do they? You know, a few weeks ago I filed a detailed report about how I had been kidnapped by five young blonde lesbians and they put a collar and chain on me, then dressed me in a frilly maid’s dress and made me lick their boots clean, while they kissed and cuddled each other wearing various latex and leather outfits – and do you know what? The Police said they thought I’d made it all up! |
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| No rush. You’re not going anywhere. |
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| Many men who’ve been on the course say it was a life-changing, eye-opening experience. They’re all very, very grateful. |
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| Not too much, mind. Don’t want to make it too easy. |
Grand, epic, homicidal.
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| Armpit Fetishist Monthly is just another example of the decline of traditional media, another fine publication swept away by the Internet. I recall their cookery page with particular affection. |
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| My office established a system of disciplinary procedures for inappropriate sexual activity. Which to my mind is just having your cake and eating it too… or would be, were I allowed cake. |
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| I’m thinking of paella – perhaps a nice Rioja to go with it? And maybe Roger might like to try bastinado, in keeping with the Spanish theme. |
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| With luck, she’ll take up chewing gum obsessively. |
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| Love hurts and so does she. |
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| More and more companies are discovering the benefits of setting up dedicated disciplinary departments. Of course, any good manager knows that she should try to deal with performance issues in person whenever possible, but there’s only so many hours in the day. |
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| There’s an honesty about femdom that’s sometimes lacking in other areas of professional sex work, I believe. |
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| So we did. |
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| I went to a financial advisor and explained to her how exciting I found financial domination and she said I should seek professional help. Which is exactly what I was doing… very confusing. So I explained that I wanted her to take all my money with no explanation and never give me anything in return – and it was her turn to look confused, because apparently that’s exactly what she does, as an independent financial advisor. |
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| I get a bit fed up with being asked that. Why do professional ladies assume I’m into SPH? It’s the first question every doctor I’ve ever had has asked me, for instance. |
Just, more of it than usual.
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| It’s not that special. Chocolate log with a couple of profiteroles, basically. I could do that. I don’t see why they need such a big carving knife for it, either. |
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| There are few surer ways to keep the romance of marriage alive than doing your wife’s boyfriend’s laundry, and picking things up around his apartment. |
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| And they say there are no jobs for men in the modern workplace! There will always be shoes, I say and I don’t think we’re going to be seeing them cleaned over the Internet any time soon! |
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| Probably. Or some other reason. Does it matter? |
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| Don’t worry – they have a solar charger, so it’s very environmentally sound. Anyway, no one could seriously consider it a ‘waste’ of electricity to shock a man’s testicles, could they? It’s what electricity was invented for. |
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| Mmm…. Sounds like there’s a heavy session in store! And without even having to pay! Well… not pay directly, anyway. |
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| You can claim compensation from the airline, I expect. Then get another one. A nuisance but hardly the end of the world. Except for him, obviously. |
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| I’m hoping to develop a bead-sorting fetish. Hasn’t happened yet, but there are many, many long nights ahead of me so there’s plenty of time. |
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| I wish my wife would let me have a weekly allowance… imagine, money of my own to spend on whatever I want! But she says I’m not ready for that kind of responsibility and she’s probably right. |
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| Or maybe next year. |
The delightful Mistress Eleise, the best view ever to appear through a periscope, here to round off this bumper holiday bonanza of… you can supply your own word beginning with b.
And… just to finish off, a little found femdom starring the fabulous Emily Ratajkowski.
I recommend Mr Pinniped’s channel more generally, actually.
I hope all the female readers (OK, both the female readers) of this blog have a lovely 2019 and the rest of you have the miserable, soul-destroying time you so richly deserve and secretly crave.
Whoops – I appear to have scheduled two posts to appear on the same day. Oh well, too late to change it now. Scroll down for another post immediately under this here one and marvel at how samey it all is, when experienced in bulk.
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| No indeed. He doesn’t have to have a happy marriage for it to be a successful one in all the ways that matter. |
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| Don’t forget to ask when you can see her again. |
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| It’s his own fault. He should have told her he’s afraid of heights. Sorry – what’s that? He did tell her? Oh. Well, it must be his own fault for some other reason then. |
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| Supposedly you can gain confidence as a speaker by imagining your audience naked. Worth a try. |
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| She doesn’t like to bring her work home. Occasionally, a few fingernails or other bits get stuck to her boots, but that’s about it. |
