female-led relationships – Page 24 – Contemplating the divine

Try to see it Her way

Quite a moment here, in your marriage. Because it’s the last time you’ll hear “fetch the canvas bag” without experiencing that stab of fear.

Nothing wrong with a healthy day’s sport. Really, they’re just helping Nature to keep the numbers down.

Another femdom castration caption? Dear me

Hmmm… she’s rather pretty isn’t she? It’ll be fun fantasising about her when you’re lying in bed after your operation. As long as your throat doesn’t ache so much you’re not feeling in the mood, anyway. Something to look forward to!

Lesbian twosome is the closest youll get

God, it can be agonising waiting for a woman to come sometimes, can’t it? Especially when you’ve started drawing blood. Oh well – better get on with it.

Really, you can scream and beg as much as you like. She doesn’t mind at all.

I have to praise Her

…like I should…

Although to be fair, it takes him even longer. Months, usually.

Oh don’t worry – it’s just a caption, she’s not really that unfeeling. Anyway, she got another one, so it all ended up well.

Marriage – it takes some getting used to. Just deciding to eat whenever you feel like it, thinking only of yourself, entering or leaving a room without permission, owning things – you just have to gradually accept that you don’t do that any more.

One femdom swallow does not a summer...oh Im not going there

Refusng to swallow could turn out to be quite hazardous to your health, though.

Mmmmpphrrrnnnghhhh.

Safe words

“Sorry” is usually fairly safe, I find.

Hmmm…

“Yes Mistress” is generally quite harmless too…

Not sure I know of any others.

Another day, another, err…

I used to think it was a load of nonsense, but then I went on a gender sensitivity course and was surprised to discover just how sensitive parts of my body could become.

I have nothing to say.

Isn’t technology wonderful? Just a few fingers swiped across this simple device and all the household chores are done and there’s an extra €10,000 in her bank account. Amazing.

Nothing wrong with a few visible signs of a good healthy loving relationship.

Marks for bad behaviour

What was his offence? Oh – reading porny blogs on the Internet, I think. Eighteen months with hard labour – he got off quite lightly, wouldn’t you say?

Mmmm. A new experience!.

Just like a mother to remind you of those embarassingtimes over her knee, eh? Last Friday, for example, just before the wedding. That was a bad one.

Freedom is slavery.

D-I-V-O-R-C-E - find out what you mean to her

Well… at least you’re talking. That’s good, right?

A facility for correction

This wonderful lady certainly has one. Thank You, my Lady.

‘Dainty’. Isn’t that a nice word? All dainty down there. And kinda cute.

Oh – and for the orgasm shots they use a body double.

Fortunately, all my girlfriends assured me that I never suffered too much from that particular complaint.

Are you going to let her order you about like that? Are you? Well?

Funny, that, because it always tastes exactly like soap.

Screaming when she comes

I usually find I do.

On with the captioned images of printed circuits. Sorry, I mean female domination. Long day.

And there he was thinking he’d got off lightly for once. Good thing Linda came home.

It’s nice when something you thought was finished gives you just a little bit extra like that.

But you have to pay her €500 first.

I think this is one of those times when it’s just up to you to decide how to take it, you know? On the one hand you could get angry – let’s face it, it was a pretty mean trick. But on the other, you could just be pathetically grateful that they noticed your miserable existence at all, couldn’t you?

Actually, to be entirely accurate, you won’t be able to leave one small corner of the basement.

The truth can hurt

…but so can lying.

Actually, he was wearing two belts.

Men’s brains aren’t good at remembering dates, but they do have a really good nerve connection to the genitals, so it’s a perfect match.

“Snip-Lit”. It’s going to be the next big thing after 50 Shades of Grey, you’ll see.

She’s not actually a dentist. She did admit that on his fourth visit, to be fair.

I think this is one of those marriages where the arguments always end up with screaming and tears, don’t you?

Her obedient servant

Hurry up, she wants you suspended and well flogged before going out – and the dinner reservation is for eight!

Dave season starts today! Actually, that’s not true. Every day is Dave season.

Just try to empathise. Men aren’t very good at it, but women know that and often make a particular effort to make their feelings known.

He can’t tell Coke from Pepsi, but he can tell Paolo from Antonio.

Oh well, never mind. You’d probably have been rubbish at it anyway.

Domesticated

Feral males can be such a nuisance, especially in urban areas, don’t you think? These ladies could sort all that out.

The ladies in the picture do actually seem to be carrying ~~canes. Isn’t that great?~~ swords. Not canes, swords. Oh well..maybe a quick 20 with the flat… hmmm?

This is the Chilean army according to the divine Ms Ayesha, so there we are. Chile. Long and thin. Very much so. I’ll admit I don’t know much else about Chile… but I know what I like.

A bleak lonely and miserable caption about kinky sex

If he only realised it, the triple whipping he gets occasionally is for his wedding anniversary. But men – they always forget, don’t they?

I think it’s a bit cruel. It’s not as if most men have that many brain cells to begin with.

Of course, she doesn’t use spurs and riding whip. Not on a pony.

Easy for her to say. She didn’t have to spend the night sleeping in the hotel corridor.

Restraining orders

Yes please. Those.

These too:

The leash is invisible, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one there.

Rather a thoughtless gift, as she can’t drive, don’t you think? I expect he’ll be punished for that. When she can be bothered.

Pain-killers don’t work, anyway. I was taking some, for a minor condition, but when I went to visit my Significant Other the nipple clamps still hurt like hell. I’m thinking of complaining to the Adertising Standards Authority.

I cant remmebre what this femdom caption was about

Yes, being caged up for that long is pretty scary. But not as scary as Lucy.

That would be really helpful, actually. I find that almost every day, there are some moments when I catch myself not thinking about Anne. Of course, it doesn’t happen often, but it’s still a bit worrying.