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| It’s not the only cane, either. Dammit. |
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| Yes, that might be best. |
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| Don’t worry. She’s good at pain management. You’ll see. |
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| Thoughtful! |
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| Just one today, thank goodness. |
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| C’mon now! Are you going to let her get away with that? Huh? Oh. OK then. |
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| Yeah, the human body has remarkable self-healing powers. And if not, there are lots more men out there. |
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| She should watch out… illegal to watch that sort of thing in Britain. Illegal just about everywhere to actually do it too, so don’t worry about a thing – she’s only playing. |
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| Just try to hold onto the memory. For about eight weeks. |
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| I like to be helpful. |
Ah well, summer holidays over and it’s back to the daily grind. Which to be honest can leave you quite sore, especially when you then have to get up and go to work. But who am I to argue?
I hope you enjoyed the archival clear-out over August. But not that you enjoyed it so much you did anything you shouldn’t.
Back to normal. More of the same, but written more recently.
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| Down you go. You’ve got at least 10 hours before sunset. |
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| Submissive man not actually very good at housework, in reality! Who’d have thought? |
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| It’s just her thing. Go with it. |
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| She got you, babe. |
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| Yes. Anyway, it really doesn’t matter how big it is, if you’re not allowed to do anything with it. |
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| Aooooarrrahhh-oooo, eeehhhhuuuh! |
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| I’m sure we’ve all been there. |
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| That’s true, actually. I mean, I certainly don’t experience pain the way my Significant Other does. I experience it a lot more frequently, for a start. |
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| “Just” in the sense of “only” |
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| Hmm. 16 orgasms in less than a minute. Quite a performance. Let’s try not to repeat it. |
…of the usual sort.
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| Don’t worry, she always reaches orgasm eventually. She won’t give up. |
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| If you pay extra, she’ll do tease and denial too. That’s where she asks you if you’d like to come, before telling you to fuck off. |
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| Actually, she does get occasional complaints. But they’re always retracted, with a heartfelt apology, before the end of the session. |
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| Technology… oh dear. As if I wasn’t already obsolete enough. |
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| In space, no one else can hear you scream. |
(Occasionally I need a title like that to keep the search engines interested, I feel).
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| Lucky Andy’s getting a freebie! |
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| She is good at dealing with feelings of guilt. |
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| It’s quite a common condition. Thank goodness they’ve found a cure. |
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| Let’s hope Steve’s nice. And not too fat. |
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| Interestingly, I find the stress often starts before I’m put into the position. |
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| Maybe just for the company? |
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| And work slowly around the rest of your body. |
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| There’s something comforting about a collar. |
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| Yeah. He’ll have been fine. Probably. Anyway, that’s not really the point of the story, you know? |
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| Oh go on – try the chat-up line anyway, why not? |
Well, the consensus seems to be that Google has backed down, so here we go again.
Have a double-length post to make up for it. Oh – and for the next three weeks or so there will be an additional caption each day on the Tumblr site, that will not appear here (because my filing system is too disorganised to find the right ones, if I delete the Tumblr queue).
****ing Google.
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| Don’t worry. You don’t have to do anything she doesn’t want you to do. In fact, you mustn’t. |
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| Who says men are useless, eh? |
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| I expect you’ll manage well enough without. |
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| It’s bound to be a bit painful at first. But you’ll get used to it. |
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| I’ve always had this ability to make women laugh. I think I was born with it. |
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| When he left school, he wanted to work in IT. And he does – he usually stops by that department just before lunch |
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| Something to look forward to. |
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| That’s good of her. |
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| Another thing to tick off her bucket list. |