caption – Page 105 – Contemplating the divine

Confidently supreme

She doesn’t like ‘torturess’ either. It’s sexist. Like a woman can’t torture people just as well as a man, you know? Better, even. So don’t call her that. Call her… oh I don’t know. Something respectful, I’d suggest. Very respectful.

‘You’re a taxi!’ It’s an old joke, but I like to make my date laugh. Often, the evening together ends with her leaving my apartment almost hysterical with laughter. In fact, I bumped into an old flame the other day and she started giggling as soon as she saw me.

No problem. That’s what Kenny is here for. He pays handsomely for the privilege, after all.

I wouldn’t mind, but I read that book before, counting ‘the’ for another Mistress.

This is the wonderful Lady Sophia Black, who is if anything even more wonderful in person than Her online persona (which is very, very wonderful indeed).

Hmmm. She seems to have mostly disapppeared from the Internet. Now that is a loss.

Choking on someone else’s vomit? Unpleasant but, well, you know, Her kink is not your kink. Or anyone’s.

Mistress Cassie Hunter, the Hunteress, who seems not to have retired after all. So that’s a bit better.

Dancing to Her tune

It’s definitely syrup, so don’t worry about that, OK?

I mean it’s no wonder she prefers spending time just with Howard if you’re all gloomy, is it?

I dunno. She orders me around, ignores my wishes, feeds my genitals to the cat… Sometimes I wonder why I put up with it all.

See? And you were worried you might not be having any sex on your honeymoon!

Domino specialists are odd. To visit one, you need to book in advance, phone that same morning before 10am to confirm (and receive instructions on meeting up, the first time) then take your course fees along in an unsealed envelope. I always take a little gift, too. Not dominoes – I expect they get enough of those.

Panic of girls

Oh well. It has to be better than that call centre in Dhaka she put me in last year.

That is what little boys are made of, after all. Somehow I always knew.

Well, as long as she’s genuinely rehabilitated herself, I suppose it’s OK.

Girls have always known I’m ‘special’ and treated me accordingly.

I feel disempowered every time I even see a picture of Gal Gadot. I go weak at the knees.

What She said

Damn… I’d already bought the ring. Oh well. I suppose the cock could take one more, but they’re going to jingle together when I walk.

You don’t know until you’ve tried it, do you?

Mmpphh mpphhhnnmm mmmphhh nng.


Well, they might not care and she might not care, but I care. Doesn’t that count for anything? Oh. OK, then.

Probably just as well that physical responses to stereotypically sexually submissive outfits don’t engender automatic castration. I mean, Tumblr’s business model would collapse, for a start.

PS: dedicated readers of this blog might enjoy this four minute movie. It’s not, like, explicit femdom or anything but I thought it was rather sweet. He’s a lucky guy – the husband, I mean. Well, Santa too, I guess.

Lap of honour

It’s funny how much clearer things can appear, through tear-stained eyes.

Yes, I suppose I am. I even irritate myself, sometimes.

Oh good. Thrash it out, once and for all.

It must be awful for her, having a brutal boyfriend. Imagine how she felt: just having to stand there watching you being beaten up.

Well, that’s settled. Good. On with the ironing.

Shameful display!

20 minutes? Women, eh? I can get there in 20 seconds, usually before I’ve even got my trousers off.

,,,and footboys are sworn to the code of secrecy. Also, rarely if ever allowed to go out or communicate with anyone except Mistress.

They proved it scientifically, using double-blind tests. 125 blindfolded men were slapped across the face repeatedly, over a period of three years (while others received equivalent amounts of pain in other ways, as a control). On average, memory retention increased by 2.3%, on a statistically significant basis. The effect wasn’t uniform, though. Some subjects benefitted a lot, but fully 17% of the men receiving the slapping treatment were unable to remember anything at all from their lives before the programme started. There’s obviously a lot still to learn, but the Institute just received a €8 million grant, so research continues.

He likes her to be pristine for when he comes on her breasts.


Just what I always say. It’s all very well to say that men and women should be equal in status and respect, but naughty bottoms don’t spank themselves, do they, so there has to be some differentiation of roles in marriage. That’s a nice-looking corner, just behind them, by the way, don’t you think? I expect they make good use of that.

Taking liberties

There are a few other differences: for example, they use shorter words and less complicated concepts in the male stream, for obvious reasons.

I already wanted to be laundry boy. Very, very much.

I’ve heard she’s a bit of a sweetie in real life. Torture is just a job for her, you know? She’s awfully good at it, though.

No… no. I think that’s all very reassuring.

This is the truly delightful (yes: another Lady with the misfortune to have encountered servitor in the quivering flesh), beautiful, witty and sexy Miss Tiffany Naylor.

Oh, I don’t know. I think I’d quite like to be at least a little bit late.

Controlling personality syndrome

It’s not a ‘disorder’, thank goodness.

It’s a remarkable experience, actually wanting your penis to be smaller all of a sudden.

Should be a lot of fun.

It’s kind of her to help him like that. Spreader gags can be so impersonal.

My pleasure.

Cometh the hour cometh the thithy

The whole principle of arguing with women is intrinsically wrong

I’m not claiming the link is really on topic but (a) I like Simon Pegg (b) I like Sally Phillips too – rather a lot (c) she does say that and she topples him too… After that, it’s less interesting.

Meanwhile, more of this:

She’s right. You can have a lot more sex in a chastity belt than without one, oddly enough, especially if you’re taken to the right clubs.

Of course Suzie won’t mind at all, but it’s kind of her to ask. Consent – it’s the foundation of BDSM.

I must say, I find all these lovers’ pet names a bit embarassing, don’t you? Goodness, if I were Brad I’d be cringing with humiliation right now.

I mean, obviously, the two of you can always use a gag when you play, but I’ve always thought that really spoils the sensation for the woman. A muffled ‘mmmpph’ can be cute enough, but sometimes what she really needs is a good, sustained session of agonised, terrified screaming. Yum.

Actually, he is still experiencing a paid-for abduction fantasy. Only difference being: it’s hers.

Good manners never hurt anyone

Bad manners, on the other hand, can you leave you sore for days.

See what I mean about good manners? He’s approaching the conversation in a polite, respectful way. I am sure she’ll give him a fair hearing and explain the reasons for her decision, in return.

Now this looks like an example of someone going all sulky and silly about things. She offered him a choice. She didn’t have to but she did. If he won’t respond graciously to that then… well, there will be consequences, let’s just say that and leave it there.

She’s very keen on good manners. Impossible girl.

See how fair they’re being? They’re going to calmly debate it and they’ll only keep on whipping him if it’s what the majority wants to do. I hope he’ll accept the decision graciously, even if it’s not what he wanted. Not that it affects anything, whether he accepts it or not, but it’s more polite.

My SO went to the Caribbean. – Jamaica?- No, of course not. I don’t get to tell her what to do – I’m her slave.