blonde – Page 27 – Contemplating the divine

Divine retribution

Do not seek to question it.

It’s funny how you sometimes feel let down after a birthday, don’t you think? As if there should have been more to it, somehow? Oh well – there’s always next year. In you go.

Yes, let’s get it sorted.

Still am, I’m afraid to say. Ow!

And she’s used to getting what she wants.

Easy to confuse the two. Wouldn’t it be awful, though, if you visited a beautiful young professional lady for an intensive CBT session, then found yourself spending the next two hours putting positive feelings into practice?

Teenage kicks right through the night

Great song, terrible idea if you have to get up and go to work the next day.

Like, totally.

Oooh. Four, I think. Yes. Four. But strangely, there’s another eight I never reach. I wonder what they’re for?

Actually you do kiss on both cheeks too. That’s the next bit, after she turns round.

I’m beginning to think that bloody die is loaded. But she wouldn’t do that to me. Would she?

Don’t forget to tell her that joke. You know – the one you found on the Internet to show her how witty you are.

I wish she’d make her mind up

You know, for years now my Significant Other has been telling me (and all of her friends, and my co-workers, and people who work in the shops locally and so on) that my cock’s too small.

But do you know what? Just the other day, she told me she’s decided it’s too big, and she’s arranged for something to be done about it!

Well, I had to laugh. Women, eh?

Femdom air stewardess gloves and an attitude

Nothing to worry about – the flight’s delayed by three hours, so there’s plenty of time.

Married life… it’s going to take some getting used to. Might as well start now.

Looks like she’s decided to work to save the marriage. That’s a relief.

Hmm. Another lady who seems to have made a big decision. Looks like important relationship milestones are a theme of today’s blog.

Worcester is pronounced “wooster”, in case you were wondering. And this is the most beautiful woman alive. Anything else I can help you with?

Out with the old, in with the new

New year, new…well, more…of the same sort of really…captioned images of female domination!

Obviously.

Sigh. Back to it.

My Significant Other reckons some people over-complicate chastity play. You lock someone up – he’s in chastity. Job done, and you can get on with your life.

Actually, I think one of them has a Girl Guides first aid qualification.

The problem being, of course, that Madame Sarka likes the cooked meat arranged in a gentle curve. And she’s not as lenient.

Independent thought is over-rated. Just take the pill.

It’s best not to worry too much about what people think of you, I find.

All about Eve

New Year’s Eve, that is.

My very best wishes to all my female readers, and let’s hope the new year brings nothing but misery, humiliation, pain and degradation to the others. That way, everyone’s happy.

Don’t miss tomorrow’s extra, bumper, first-of-2013 edition of Contemplating the Divine! It’s all about resolve…

I know when I’ve been beaten

and sometimes the neighbours do, too.

Actually, that whip she gave him is pretty take-charge too. But it doesn’t hurt to make sure. Well..I mean, it does hurt. Obviously.

A little light spanking?

Yeah, come on. She’s right. Sometimes you just have to trust people. What’s the worst that can happen? Hmm? Oh – well apart from that, then.

Her very first maid-boy! Bless.

Business. It’s all about relationships. This particular relationship is female-led and abusive. Welcome to the team. Worm.

I will feel a glow just thinking of you…

…and the way it felt, last night. Thank you, Ma’am.

You might want to refer back to my series: Seven secrets of a happy marriage. Urgently.

Men, eh? Only interested in one thing, and – excuse me? Down here? There’s a caption too, and I.. Hello? Oh never mind, I know when there’s something more interesting to look at.

I’m not one of those men who won’t cry in front of women. Just the opposite, actually.

Woah! Might be time for a safeword, there.

If you have any comments on this captioned image, I’ll be in the homeless refuge round the corner, OK?

Pervertual reality

Welcome to my world.

You need to be careful about that. Dommes can be rather literal-minded. I told my Significant Other that my heart belonged to her, and it took quite a while (and a lot of cash) to persuade her that it was best to leave it inside me for a while.

Sometimes, one partner in the relationship has to take the first step, and really try something new, y’know?

Come to think of it, it was nothing. Forget it.

It’s just not fair on her, the way it is, do you see? Having to say no every month – it just makes her the bad guy. Come on – give a little, here.

See? Didn’t I tell you? If you don’t want them to take your requests literally, just don’t ask. Now look what you made her do.

Brutal elegance

Or should that be ‘elegantly brutal’? Both are good, I think.

Leather clad femdom whip and boots oh yum yum

That’s a relief. I thought she might be cross.

Women always appreciate a compliment. Quick, try another. She might even take one of the weights off.

Schoolgirl caning - but the other way around

I don’t know why they have those canes with them, though. I suppose they don’t realise that corporal punishment has long been abolished in British schools. Poor things – they must have been so worried!

Well, this is going well.

Wife loves your new secretary or she will

Later, when his new secretary moved in with them, the ladies found a way of making doubly sure. So that’s all right.

And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

More captioned images of female domination. Obviously.

Captioned image of Mistress Vixen showingf her skills

I hope Peter appreciates the expertise. Look at that whip-work. Marvellous.

And it’s probably best to think of all that housework as roleplay too. Hell, she might even let you wear a little maid dress if you ask nicely.

Dominatrix squeezes both men into her cage

She’s actually talking to the man in the cage, you know, not to you.

Femdom nurse might have removed more than your tonsils

You can get compensation for that, I understand. Just fill out a form and they might give you anything up to £25. Worth a go. You could buy some panties with it.

If any German-speaking females want to correct my grammar, spelling or anything else, then of course they are welcome to do so – and propose any appropriate correction to help the lesson stick in my mind.