Love and marriage


yes, I’d forgotten you haven’t been here since I had that put in.  Don’t you recognise it?  It’s George – you know, my husband!  Well, what’s left of him.

yes, he’s still my husband.  We’re just
waiting for the divorce papers to come through. 
That’s why I had him fixed there, to remind me.

is clever, isn’t it?  Yes, they were able
to amputate the arms and legs all the way up to the joints.  Because I was afraid that they’d leave little
stumps or something, and he’d be able to waggle them a bit.  Wouldn’t that be disgusting?  But no, they’ve done it very neatly.  Just a torso. 

he can’t move his neck either.  The
doctors attached a steel bar running right down his spine, you see, and it goes
all the way into his skull.  He can’t
move nod or turn his head at all – not even a millimetre.  And his jaw’s wired up, of course.  Sorry about the silly little grin, but they
needed to keep it a little open, for feeding purposes.  But they removed his teeth and his tongue, of
course.  And his vocal chords.

Hmmm?  Oh trust you to notice that!  Yes, I did decide to leave them on.  Of course, I was really tempted to have him
castrated – they even said I could do it myself.  But I thought it might be more fun if they
were still there, you know?  I do enjoy
playing with them, after all.  It’s
amazing how well they’ve lasted really, after all I’ve done to them.  They can take a lot more punishment than you
think, actually.  I’ve even set them on
fire a few times, but there are still some nerve endings left.  Look – I’ll show you.  There! 
See how his breathing gets much faster when I push this pin into
it?  And then if I wiggle it about I –
yes, you see?  Plenty of nerve endings

yes, I don’t think I’ll keep him much after the divorce papers come
through. Should be any day now.  And then
maybe I’ll just stop feeding and watering him – and put him outside by the
trash.  Unless you’d like to…?  No?  I
just thought I’d offer, seeing as the two of you were an item back in college,
that’s all.  No problem: I’ll deal with

he can still use his eyes.  Apart from
his lungs, I suppose they’re the only other muscles he can still move.  See – look at how he’s watching us?  Oh – isn’t that sweet?  He’s crying. 
He seemed to have stopped doing that a few weeks back, but maybe seeing
you reminds him of his old life or something. 
Maybe he thinks you’ll save him? 
Hard to know what he’s thinking really. 
But I do like him still to be able to see me, so I know he’s thinking
about what I’m doing to him.  I’ll
probably put them out before I finally get rid of him, of course.


clever you!  No, I suppose he doesn’t
need both eyes.  I hadn’t thought of
that!  Why don’t we do one of them right
now?  I don’t suppose you have a
cigarette on you, do you?  You do?  Oh wonderful – that’ll be perfect.  I gave up just over a year ago, you
know.  But maybe I could…I mean just one
wouldn’t hurt, would it?  And then maybe
we could both stub them out at the same time. 
Shall we do the right or the left, do you think?

Mmmm….  Oh god, this is wonderful.  I’d forgotten how much I loved smoking.  You shouldn’t have let me have it, you
naughty girl!  Oh never mind,
though.  Mmmm….lovely.  Well, when I finish this one, I’ll stub it
out, and that’ll be that.
I think the left one…don’t you?

funny, you know.  He always disapproved
of my smoking.  He was so pleased when I
gave up.  Said watching me stub the last
one out was the best day of his life. 
Didn’t you, darling?  Well, you’ll
certainly be watching very closely when I stub this one out. Very closely indeed…

0 thoughts on “Love and marriage”

  1. Is this Cruella Pain, the writer of those books on Amazon? Have you read them?

  2. Do you mean is the lovely lady Cruella Pain or do you mean am I, as the author, really her?

    It doesn't matter too much, as the answer to both is no. She's a spectacular model from the early, glorious days of Cruella Magazine in the UK and I'm… well, not.

    I don't doubt the books are very nice, though, at least as far as the author's name is anything to go by, so maybe I'll check them out.

    Best wishes


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