spanking – Page 9 – Contemplating the divine

So pretty, oh so pretty

Not the version by those dreadful yobs, of course, but by Mistress Joan.

Oh well, I suppose it’s something to take my mind off it.

She’s Prisoner Welfare Officer too, so you know she’s got your best interests at heart.

A lot of new findommes have the wrong idea about financial domination. It’s actually quite hard work. But not for the domme, obviously.

This being a fantasy blog, I expect she’s going to ‘punish’ you by doing all the things you’ve always dreamed about, rather than just divorcing you and exposing you to ridicule in the newspapers.

They’re very zealous about it. Indeed, I believe that some of his team are about to raid an establishment where they’ve received a tip-off about repeated violations of the ban on smoking in the workplace. They don’t give any warning – just burst straight in through the door, cameras at the ready.

Pink? Pink? Well, what’s wrong with pink?

Seems like you got a pink kink in your think!

Thank goodness I’m not going to be the only one there in pink, anyway.

I only went for the make-up tips anyway.

Ah – the rolling pin! Just in that sweet spot between loving domestic discipline and cranial fracture.

Time to come out and play!

Nor are there many rhymes for “penectomy”. I mean, you can just about work something in with “respect for me” but it’s a bit contrived, don’t you think? And we don’t like to have excessively contrived notions here on Contemplating the Divine, as you probably know.

Suffering fools

Gladly or otherwise.

I never want to be more than two paces behind… for the rest of my life.

I hate having to disturb her when she’s working. But I can’t just take money from her purse without permission, so…

Tony gets steak and chips… not fair, I say. But then he does have a night of vigorous sexual activity ahead of him, so I suppose he needs the calories.

Sometimes they get a babysitter, but if they’re not going out until 7.30 or so, it’s easier just to put Paul to bed half an hour early. I mean it’s not like anything can go wrong, with his mittens fastened to the sides of the cucky-drawer.

Aparently, a lot of condemned prisoners have women writing to them offering sex. I don’t think that’s going to happen to him, though.

Indignity

Try hopping back and forth from one leg to the other. That can help a lot.

Well, OK, as long as it’s safe, sane, consensual and well-deserved. Or any two of those, anwyay.

People say that to keep up a diet you have to be really strict with yourself, but I’ve found that someone else being strict works just as well.

While you’re down there, you notice Simon’s shoes are quite badly scuffed – and there’s a client meeting later. What do you do? (a) say nothing, (b) let him know or (c) give them a quick polish yourself, as you’re there anyway. Take your time, there are no ‘wrong’ answers.

Well, as long as she remembers to keep it charged this time.

Simply divine, darling

It’s always such a relief when finally the boxes are all unpacked, there’s a chain the right length in each room, all the pillories and cages have been assembled and you can get back to ordinary married life, for goodness sake.

She’s always taken roleplay very seriously. They tried medical fetish play once and it didn’t turn out well.

Making a decision of my own free will, to do exactly whatever she has told me, immediately, is the secret to a happy life I find.

Oh, you’ve already promised to honour and obey him, so adding love to the mix doesn’t change much.

The truth will not set you free.

That’s what she said

There’s a lot of give and take in their relationship, as you can see.

That one’s called ‘the tickler’. Come on – arms up to the shackles – this is going to be fun!

Men’s
libbers just need to spend more time reflecting quietly on how lucky
they are to be living in a female-led society, if you ask me. In the
corner, with a well-smacked bottom, preferably.

Just lick something at random – quickly!

With thanks to Alex Bragin for the translation.

There’s a hand gesture for ‘go away’ as well. Pray she never uses it.

Out with the old…

… in with the younger, sexier and less fucking annoying – as my SO likes to say.

This year She’s decided that my new year’s resolutions will remain Her own secret. Pretty exciting! She’s going to make a little note every time I break one of my resolutions, then deal with it all at the end of the year. That way I can’t sneakily avoid puishment by complying, She says. So that should be fun! Apparently, I’ve broken two of them already.

Anyway, with a slightly nervous twitch in case posting captioned images is one of the things I’ve resolved to cut out, here are the first captioned images of 2017! Just like all the previous ones, huh?

I think you should stand up for yourself. Who does Katie think she is, anyway? Go on – man up.

Male class can be quite uncomfortable, but it’s a lot better than it was in the early days of commercial aviation. You’re inside, for a start and that makes quite a difference.

You see? Now male class in the passenger section is a lot better than going airfreight as livestock, and – What’s that? Oh. Well, it’s even better than going as cargo on a container ship too, I expect. Bon voyage.

He’s probably fine. Men’s brains can go for long periods without oxygen without loss of any useful functions anyway.

Most wedding venues keep a spanking chair somewhere around – just ask the organisers.

You made a life out of hurting me

Well, a career anyway. (warning: link is DSFW*)

*Disappointingly safe for work.

Yeah, just do whatever comes naturally. She doesn’t mind.

Apparently, onset of the male menopause can occur as early as your 20s. You just have to marry the right woman.


And what’s Ioannis got that I haven’t, I’d like to know?

In an emergency, she could always just use one of the hotel’s coathangers or something.

She only puts the big ones on her trophy wall. Smaller ones she makes into into novelty hat or shoe racks and sells them on e-bay..

Penile servitude

It turns out they did get the sugar, but it was a little untidily heaped in the bowl, so, you know…

Bad interns get spanked. Good interns get spanked and made to wear little lacy panties too.

I had to go to court once. The lady magistrate ordered me to be bound over to keep the peace. But apparently that doesn’t mean what you might think. Who knew? I just started to get myself ready, then and there, but… it’s a long story but anyway, I ended up sentenced to six months with hard labour for an obscene display in contempt of court. So that turned out quite well in the end.

Odd thing to say. I think she looks very nice.

And that’s before they start.

Lap of honour

She uses a system of rewards and penalties. Some days, when you’ve done particularly well, you’re rewarded by not being penalised.

I wasn’t a service oriented submissive when I started out, but my SO sent me on an orientation course.

The other things are negotiable. Just go ahead and negotiate – but you do have to be in position first, OK?

In any marriage, learning when to communicate – and when to stay silent – is as important as learning how.

I find these networking sites can really eat up my time. I had fifteen ironing assignments on Slavr last week, for example – took me hours to get all that done – and then there were eight notifcations waiting for me on Spankr. I thought all this technology was supposed to give us all more free time?