She’s right, you know

 She just is.




My
SO once told me that it was on our honeymoon that I gave her the best
sex she’s ever experienced.  Which is a bit of luck, really, as you
never know what you’re going to get when you’re in a foreign place and
you don’t know the escort agencies well.


It’s only fair: she took his electric razor, when they split up, I understand.



Got there eventually.  Well done.  Now let’s talk about ironing pleats.



Don’t worry: he won’t allow himself to be improperly influenced.  Properly influenced, yes, certainly, possibly even vigorously influenced.  But no more than that.




Women, eh?  Sometimes you’re supposed to scream in agony, sometimes you’re supposed to stay silent.  How are we supposed to know?  I mean, unless they use ball-gags and stuff.

Despotic love

I suppose I can wait to watch the cookery programme – I’ve become quite good at coping with deferred gratification.  Thank goodness it’s only Raoul this time, anyway.  Sometimes she invites all the guys round to watch a big game and I’m rushed off my feet fetching and carrying beers, snacks and condoms.  She must find it quite exhausting too. 

  

 

It’s funny how the simple act of having electrodes attached to your genitals can change your whole perspective on things.

 


I know she’s a busy woman, but I really think she could cane her own husband. And detention is a very special time in any relationship.



She works hard for her money (so he’d better treat her right).



But with dignity.  Always with dignity.

Fair mistreatment

 

How soon will she be back?  Oh… you know.  It’ll be forever and it’ll also be too soon, same as usual.

 


There’s actually another guy out there, but you’re unlikely to see him unless you start digging in the compost pile, and why would you do that?

 The lovely but, by the looks of things, retired Princess Neive. I wonder what she did with the boots?  I’d give them a loving home.



Poor thing. She seems very upset.  I hope this will make her feel better.


As her name is ‘Josephine’, maybe you’re better off sticking with ‘hamster’?  At least ‘hamster’ fits on one line.




Shocky!

Enthralled

What a lovely word.  I am her thrall.


Happiest day of your life!  And don’t you forget it, you ungrateful little bastard, or she’ll give you something to be unhappy about!

 

It’s not just convicted sexists, either.  Carry the donor card, help someone to look fabulous after your death.










I’ve never liked spiders. Bitter acrid flavour and the legs get stuck between your teeth.










Looks fun.  And they give you a little souvenir bag of sugar at the end of the month.  Give it to your domme, the next time you book a normal session and thank your lucky stars it’s just fantasy play.










He found her through a card she’d put up in the local telegraphy office.


Fair maidens, faint hearts




I find it’s always easier to tell the truth. The aftermath is sometimes extremely difficult.

I have my pride.  At least, I did. Hang on…it’s got to be here somewhere.

By a curious coincidence, I got the cattle prod for ‘last night’ the very second day of my marriage.
I get quite excited about this sort of thing.
I heard Jason was having an operation so I sent flowers and my best wishes for a full recovery.  Well, you never know, he might.









Pure bliss and divine serenity

Perhaps she ought to explore ways to teach him what her orgasm sounds like.  There must be opportunities, for an independently-minded lady such as her. .
Actually, most of the women I have ever paid to mistreat me are very kind to animals.  Maybe it’s a balance thing.
Thank badness for that.

Hmm… let’s think.  I’m not staying at a Travellodge, OK?  I do have some standards.

I read about this fake findomme who was defrauding her clients. Apparently she was taking their money and then not ignoring them at all.  It’s sad that kind of thing happens, as it gives the whole industry a bad name.


Subjectivity

Noun: the state of being a subject.  That used to be me but now I’m more objective.


No great loss, right?
Somehow it still feels like I’m on the leash, even when I’m not.  Strange, that.
I rolled a six this month!  But apparently “rules are made to be broken”!  Not her usual attitude to rules, I have to say… but that’s women for you.  Bless ’em.
She’s already being the best wife she can. That’s why you’re wearing the shock collar.








My brain hurts.  Sorry: I think I’m just too male today to understand this one. Something about a hash?  Is she talking about breakfast?

Repent at leisure

My repentence, her leisure.

I often suffer from pain during my SO’s sexual activity.  Usually in the same room, but not always.  Her reaching orgasm sometimes brings relief from the pain – temporarily at any rate – I’m glad to say.
Visiting a domme can be a very spiritual experience.
Oh well.  No real harm done
 The lovely Divine Mistress Heather, who in real life I am sure always makes sure her slaves get exactly the voltage they need: neither more nor (most certainly) less.
See?  She’s not a vicious, unfeeling sadist at all.  She’s a considerate, empathetic sadist.  They’re the worst.
The one on the back’s quite long. I was told it describes in detail the ways I am blessed.


Our youngers and betters

I suppose it never hurts to go through things again, just to make sure.  Well… I don’t mean it never actually hurts – obviously it does hurt – I just mean…. oh , you know.




The longer it goes on, the longer his pleasureable anticipation, I suppose.
I wonder what she has planned for the evening.  For you, that is.
Aww… is there a little furry… hairy, leggy, fangy.. friend in there with you? Or several.
You, by contrast, can easily go quite badly wrong.  But you’ll know when you do.


Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do

Mistress Apple, there, of course and she’s right, they will.





Off to your mystery honeymoon destination.  Exciting!
My SO enjoys watching me write my name.  There’s a whole bunch of forms waiting for me, as soon as I’ve finished this post.  They’re all in Arabic, so I’ve no idea what they say but apparently they’re very important.
Peggy pegs.
People can be so cruel. Especially men.  Bastards.
He can explore his submisive side.  Or not. It really won’t make much of a difference either way.