Category: caption

Gender imbalance

I won’t give away the ending. Oh all right then, I will.  The book falls off and he gets the crap beaten out of him with a perspex cane. OK?


Now I understand why they make the interns wear shorts.

erm… Translation?  Rotation?  Summation?

I’ve heard that if you insult the waiting staff in some restaurants, they’ll spit into your food. But I just can’t bring myself to be other than grovellingly respectful to a waitress.  What’s a sub to do?



One day she’ll meet Mr Perfect and won’t feel the need to enslave and degrade him.  One day.




Sex and violence…

Sex and violence, sex and violence
goes together like a gag and silence…




Fortunately for us, we can only see her front in this picture, so obviously there’s no inappropriate leering from our side.

She’s got a funny story about how he actually proposed – just wait.

Bondage and arachnophobia… quite a stimulating combination, I think.

The lovely Idda Van Munster who will be featured here again, believe me.



…and just to annoy Declan again:

       
Can I stake a claim for the first use of the word ‘contemporaneous’ in a femdom porn blog, please? *  



* Don’t worry – we’re back to normal service after Friday’s maledom special and we are no longer expecting male dominant readers.  So it’s OK to use big complicated words and subtle(ish) humour.  Yay!

The wrongs of man

are self-evident but can be sorted out by the smack of firm government in the right hands.


 

She sounds like she knows what she’s doing.
Another day, another dollar.  Well… not a whole dollar, obviously.  That’s just a saying.  In fact, they only spend a penny each time.


Huh! I’d like to see him do better.
Maybe try another topic of conversation? I mean – you got her attention. That’s a good start.

See, there he is while she’s telling him how upset she was about his thoughtless gift and all he can think about is how his lungs are burning.  That’s what men are like. It’s a good thing there’s femdom to help set us right, that’s all I can say.


Indignity

Try hopping back and forth from one leg to the other. That can help a lot.

Well, OK, as long as it’s safe, sane, consensual and well-deserved. Or any two of those, anwyay.
People say that to keep up a diet you have to be really strict with yourself, but I’ve found that someone else being strict works just as well.
While you’re down there, you notice Simon’s shoes are quite badly scuffed – and there’s a client meeting later. What do you do? (a) say nothing, (b) let him know or (c) give them a quick polish yourself, as you’re there anyway. Take your time, there are no ‘wrong’ answers.


Well, as long as she remembers to keep it charged this time.


Pitiful, really

…but it’s all I’ve got.

I once dated a girl who said she wanted me to be a stallion in the bedroom.  So I got all kitted up, you know in reins and harness, and when she came into the room I handed her spurs and the riding whip and she just screamed, slapped me round the face and left. How humiliating. Happy days…

Former boyfriends… bane of my life.

The first time a domme gave me a golden shower and ordered me to lick it up, She asked me what the taste was like.  I replied ‘tart’ and things got very painful, very quickly.   (Non-British readers won’t get that: don’t worry about it, move on).

I took a personality test once and scored a perfect zero.

She’s lying because she knows I like the contempt.  Really, she has to keep swigging at that bottle to take her mind off the hot action in front of her.  Otherwise she’d be overpowered with lust, at the sight of an overweight middle-aged sub, desperately jerking away on the floor by her boots.  Women just can’t resist that kind of thing.


Servility costs nothing

(although finding someone to whom to be servile can run to several hundred pounds an hour, in my experience)


This is something many men still have to learn.  Just because a woman chooses to wear something sexy, you can’t assume she’s doing so for your pleasure.

Any fundamentalist religious types who don’t believe in female supremacy might care to meditate on why the Divine Being provided males with testicles in such a handy container, and then wired them stright into the pain centres.  Don’t you think She’s given us a bit of a clue, there?

Mis-statement I’d like to forget?

One day he’s going to have to give up the thing that matters most to him. Her.

Yeah, the usual order.


Simply divine, darling





It’s always such a relief when finally the boxes are all unpacked, there’s a chain the right length in each room, all the pillories and cages have been assembled and you can get back to ordinary married life, for goodness sake.

She’s always taken roleplay very seriously. They tried medical fetish play once and it didn’t turn out well.

Making a decision of my own free will, to do exactly whatever she has told me, immediately, is the secret to a happy life I find.
Oh, you’ve already promised to honour and obey him, so adding love to the mix doesn’t change much.

The truth will not set you free.


Suitable treatment

Ah… the second childhood. I’m looking forward to that.

(sorry)

Therapy can be painful.

Quite a therapeutic theme today.  Using boys for anger management makes a lot of sense: it can work off a lot of tension and no one who matters gets hurt.

Little does she know I’m a humiliation freak as well as a service-oriented submissive, so being despised is just all part of the fun!



Hmmm… just noticed that my favourite Tumblr cuandolasmujeresmanden has just disappeared.  Damn! I know there’s about a billion femdom image reposting Tumblrs but cuando somehow just managed precisely to match my own perverted tastes .  And only posted high quality pictures too.  First ‘Femdom Times’ goes into hibernation for ever and now this.  Does Tumblr close down ‘adult’ blogs?  I must say, I can’t quite see the point, given that there’d still be 999,999,999 of them left.

Grrrr….   If anyone has a particular recommendation feel free to share it in the comments.  No blogs with nekkid women, granny porn or really icky things being done to men’s genitals and shown in close-up please.  Just good healthy bondage and discipline.  And humiliation, contempt and cruelty.

Deliver us from freedom

 

It’s a small town, so the walk of shame afterwards will only take you 15 minutes or so.

I had a very traditional upbringing – strict discipline, cold showers, that kind of thing.  It cost about £450 but it was worth every penny and I’m going back in a few weeks for another one.

Goodness, if you can’t trust your cleaner with that sort of trivial responsibility, why would you even let her into the house?
Ahhh male doms.  I think male doms are just great, in their proper place.



Perhaps you’d better approach the bench.