Category: blonde

Back to black

You’ll be in real trouble if he doesn’t.

I’ve always been confused about my masculinity. I went to a therapist once, but she just laughed hysterically the whole time.  12 one-hour sessions…I got worried she might do herself some injury, but they do say laughter is the best medecine.

Yes.  So much easier being a domme – if you’re having a bad day, just take it out on your clients.

They say women don’t like men who come quickly, but every woman in whose presence I’ve ever achieved orgasm always just seemed to want to get it over with as quickly as possible.  I suppose it maximises their income per hour.

Just one of many things that can go wrong. Good thing nothing important got damaged this time.


How I loved you, How I cried…..

And I still do both, I’m very glad to say.





Of course, you can still try negotiating your way out of this if you ask nicely.  I mean, it only took her an hour to get all that ready.  She won’t mind.
 The lovely Mistress Mina Thorne, of course.  You knew that already, right?  Course you did – you read Femdom Resource.

And then it’ll be the turn of the next one, and so on for the rest of the evening.

Sounds like she’s looking after him very well.

Men rarely think these things through.  Some of us are lucky enough to have plenty of time to think things through, free from any distractions except the sight of the corner of the room and the feeling of a sore bottom.

It’s not the crime; it’s the cover-up. And it’s not the paddle or the strap; it’s the cane.


4300 kPa

The pressure exerted by a woman walking in high heels. so it seems. That’s a lot of Pascals.  4.3 million Pascals, I suppose.  Makes you think, eh?  And that’s assuming she’s not actually jumping up and down.


I read that on the Physics Website, which (drawing I suspect on Cutnell, John D., & Kenneth W. Johnson. Physics. 4th ed. New York: Wiley, 1998. 338) explains it this way:

equation

This is approximately 40 atmospheric pressures. Now you realize the full potential
of the high heel.
For comparison’s sake, would you rather your hand be pummeled by a herd of elephants
or a group of angry women wearing high heels?

Sorry, what was that?


Would you rather your hand be pummeled by a herd of elephants
or a group of angry women wearing high heels? 

Mmmmm… sounds like you don’t read this blog very often, Mr Physics Website.

Anyway, it all seems very instructive. I won’t link to the website as I don’t think they’d particularly appreciate this source of traffic (yes, dear readers, that’s right: I am ashamed of you).   On with what we do on this website, now.






It’s not actually the days wearing the collar that will hurt you, in any case.  It’s all the things you said and did during those days when you weren’t wearing it.




Looks like you’re about to get a feel for Russian culture.

Interestingly, a recent survey found that many women with husbands in chastity actually start wearing sexy clothes more often than before.  Women, eh? Always missing the point.  Bless ’em.

Anyway, he’s got another ear. So it’s not like the time when she – oh, well,, that’s another story.

Kafkaesque, no?


Blonde obedience

You just have to be polite.  You don’t have to approve of castration yourself – you’re welcome to your own opinion, after all.  She might not take any particular notice of your opinion, but you can have it.

A talent you never knew you had.

I don’t uderstand people who pay for vanilla sex. I mean, I go to a dominatrix, it’s two hours of punishment and humiliation.  A really rich, varied experience. Pay someone for straight sex and what have you got?  Three seconds of fun, maybe four?


Chemical castration.  Hmm.  Not much fun for her, is it?


Little toys for little boys.


Marriage guidance

Honesty is so important in a mariage. I told my wife on our wedding night that I wanted her to be completely honest and open, if my performance in bed wasn’t satisfying her, and the very next day she told the hotel staff and a couple of guys we met in a bar all about it.  And since then, she’s told all her friends, all my friends, my co-workers and quite a lot of random strangers.  So much better for these things to be out in the open, don’t you think?


Oh… that Sonia.  Oh dear.







We can’t always get what we want. She can, but we can’t.









I guess you could always renegotiate if it isn’t working out for one or other of you.


She’s got a lot of pain for Doug to work through.




You’ve got me pretty deep baby

I can’t figure out your watery love

She can help you deal with feelings of guilt, too.


I’ve never seen the point of masturbation gloves, to be quite honest.  I mean why buy a special item of clothing that you’re almost never going to wear?

You could try to bluff your way out. Or grovel.  I think I’d go with grovel… but that’s just me.

Nice to have something to think about, to take your mind off how much it’s going to fucking hurt.

Always consensual. It’s rule number 1.  Well, in my relationship it’s actually rule number 286, but you know what I mean.

The agony and the ecstacy

Well, she seems very nice. Many dommes would be quite angry in such a situation.  Up you get.

She needs the money to get into the scene, that’s all.  Don’t worry – she’s genuinely turned on by fat middle-aged men rubbing against her like that.  That’s why she does it.

She owns a plumber too, which could come in handy if she decides to install you as a toilet slave.
I think Emily will be able to tell exactly how very, very sorry you are in just a short while.


Yes, I rather suspect she does.


It’s all so calculating (she’s got a calculator)

You say you’ll never know him, he’s an unnatural man

It’s not the size anyway, it’s what you do with it.  And how many times.

He can say no, of course. As many times as he likes, actually.
She gets through boyfriends quite quickly, I’ve heard.  Must be a bit fickle, I suppose.  Shame, ‘cos she’s cute.

Looks good on her, don’t you think?  Better than on the donors, I expect.

Actually, there are lots of things they don’t approve of men doing. Good job you’ve got her to protect you.

I’m so hot for her, I’m on fire for her

yet she’s so cold.  And so’s the tub of cream in the bathroom cabinet, if she’ll only let me out of this corner to go and get some. Please, Mistress. Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease.

It’s not about you, do you see?

 

Actually, you can fit a sub in either way round. She’s just got it wrong, that’s all. Made an embarassing, stupid mistake. Do you want to tell her, or shall I?

I could add a caption here, but what does my opinion matter anyway?

It’s important to understand the power dynamics of your bdsm relationship. Frankly, that’s important at any time, but it’s particularly important when you’re naked and dangling helplessly from the ceiling.
It’s good she’s decided to treat you as an adult, for once.


Adult content warning

Persons proceeding past this point will encounter no genuinely adult content whatsoever, merely juvenile humour and sexual innuendo written by someone with the emotional intelligence of a teenager. You have been warned.

Let’s hope he enjoyed wishes 1 and 2.


Not very politically correct. Perhaps I need to be politically corrected.

Don’t worry, she’ll give him a 10% discount for all those extra hours.

These gender roles are essentially all social constructs anyway.  Why should we have to conform to a role because of what sex we are?  What if I choose not to do the housework, hmm? Well… I get tied across a chair and thrashed, obviously. But I could if I wanted to.. and didn’t mind the beating. That’s the point.






Self-harming is such a waste.  When there are people out there who’d love to do it for you.