blimey its got the lot – Page 2 – Contemplating the divine

Making him pay

nnnn nnnNNN NNNGGG! nngg nnnng!

Oh well. It’ll be agony this time, around, but…it’s not as if you masturbate often. Is it?

Oddly, I understand this is one exception to the rule ‘everything tastes like chicken’. It just doesn’t.

This is from a lovely English Mansion clip, much of which can be found here. I just love the way Mistress Neive (the blonde one) giggles. ‘Hee hee hee’. Somehow the way she’s slightly self-conscious makes it even sexier.

Good thing you’re into humiliation. You’ll be getting lots of that.

Actually, it’ll be quite a bit cheaper than having it done back in a properly equipped facility in the First World. More holiday spending money – can’t object to that!

Boys will be toys

Yet more captioned images of female domination. What else were you expecting? Dancing kittens?

But don’t ask her to buy you any long trousers. You know she won’t.

She’s going to be applying some science.

It’s all right. She’ll take it nice and slowly.

This is the divine Mistress Vixen.

You’ve only yourself to blame. You gave her the job – remember? I can’t imagine why. She’s rubbish at cleaning.

It’s not as if Raoul would be taking your matrimonial rights. She’s not going to fuck you, whetever happens, she’s made that quite clear. So you’re not losing anything. Be reasonable, hmm?

Try to see it Her way

Quite a moment here, in your marriage. Because it’s the last time you’ll hear “fetch the canvas bag” without experiencing that stab of fear.

Nothing wrong with a healthy day’s sport. Really, they’re just helping Nature to keep the numbers down.

Another femdom castration caption? Dear me

Hmmm… she’s rather pretty isn’t she? It’ll be fun fantasising about her when you’re lying in bed after your operation. As long as your throat doesn’t ache so much you’re not feeling in the mood, anyway. Something to look forward to!

Lesbian twosome is the closest youll get

God, it can be agonising waiting for a woman to come sometimes, can’t it? Especially when you’ve started drawing blood. Oh well – better get on with it.

Really, you can scream and beg as much as you like. She doesn’t mind at all.

Inconsequential

Mostly, that’s me. But occasionally, my behaviour has consequences, and sometimes I just have to sit quietly and reflect upon that.

Just talk about whatever comes to mind.

Actually, several of her classmates still fear her, but they pay for the privilege now.

His and hers – something for everyone. But always check it fits before leaving the shop.

I expect she’ll be terribly embarassed when she discovers her mistake.

No really. You’ll be screaming too. You’ll see.

Premature ejaculation

That’s what you call it when you come before she’s given you permission. It can be quite painful.

On with the show:

Days with a “y” in them, for example.

Now two men aren’t having sex with her.

But in the event she decided the next morning not to marry him. Wanted a man who still had his testicles, apparently. Women! Eh? You just can’t please them.

Femdom image caption caption caption and so on

It’s very kind of Sarah to do this while she’s away. After all, she really doesn’t like men – quite the man-hating lesbian, really.

Consent. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it’s the most important word in BDSM.

Femdom captions. More femdom captions.

Oi, Google! Over here. More femdom captions. Other world kingdom. Dominatrix. Bandicoots. Anne Hathaway. Kittens doing amusing things on video.

That’s enough site optimization for now. On we go.

The arms only get broken anyway, so it’s a bit silly really.

No danger of this one being talked about in the secretary’s pool. Not as long as she gets that pay rise. And yours too.

It’s better to give than receive. And important always to swallow, too.

Of course, she’s a bit of an amateur and there’s lots she doesn’t know about. Safewords, for instance. She doesn’t know about those. Or care.

Lesbian girlfriends and punishment oh my

Poor Natalie. I hope she gets over it quickly, don’t you?

Rebel without a clue

She asked me, “What are you submitting to?” and I smirked and said “What have you got?”.

So she hit me.

I like this one. I really do. This is why I caption pictures.

It’s OK, you can scream if you like. She doesn’t mind. Rather likes it, actually, if done with taste.

You should be pleased. Very few men can really make a woman laugh like that.

Toilet slavery and marriage, what a combination

We all have days that feel like that. Harvey’s are just more literal.

You will thank her later, you know.

Sweet cruelty

Shackles - the making of many a femdom marriage

They laughed when I was said I was going to start a femdom blog devoted to humorous captions and stories. They’re not laughing now…*

They offer a choice of general anaesthetic, local anaesthetic or straps plus a gag. Most patients prefer some sort of anaesthetic. But it’s not the patients who make the choice.

OWK smoking dominatrices starve slaves to death shock horror!

Of course, they give them drinks of water from time to time. Otherwise they’d just die of thirst within a day or two. Like the first batch.

Ooooo.

* Copyright Bob Monkhouse, approx. 1875.

The Power and the Glory

For ever and ever. Awomen.

Femdom wife prefers to use the cane! width=

There’ll be plenty of things to discuss later, though. How very, very sorry you are, for example.

The divine Miss Hathaway again. I’d like to write her a thank-you note for existing.

Seems nice. Let’s hope this one doesn’t insist on your sleeping on the floor in the kitchen. Like the last two.

And don’t forget to laugh at her joke, every time she makes it in front of a new client. Keep that smile on!

Nurses accidentally domme a man or possibly two men

I think Nurse Collins is the one on the right, but that’s just my opinion and it’s quite worthless.

**Update. Well for some reason (probably technical incompetence) I can’t seem to comment on my own blog today, so I’ll take this opportunity to thank Ralph D for his comments. I’m glad you don’t mind my using a picture found on your site. It works the other way too, of course, so help yourself! We’re in agreement about Anne Hathaway too (and Marie Louise Parker… and what a good idea, I’ve got a few more pictures of her around here somewhere). I think it’s the eyes. You just fall in and are lost. Have you seen the Tim Burton film of Alice in Wonderland? If not, you must. Anne as an ethereal White Queen apparently innocent of all the world, but actually scheming and manipulative. Lovely. Sadly, it’s her sister the Red Queen who actually behaves like a dominatrix (“pig!”).

The sound of one hand clapping

…while the other holds you firmly across her lap, obviously.

Before we start with the captioned images of female domination, a big thank you to Bob (or possibly BOB), for all of the thoughtful, enthusiastic and just plain deviant comments he left over the last few days, on posts going right back to the start of the blog. I’m not going to reply to each one, but I do really appreciate people leaving comments, particularly positive ones (from male readers – those whose genetics are not ruined by the presence of y-chromosomes are very welcome to leave contemptuous abuse). Thanks Bob (or possibly BOB)!

Here we go then: